Tully v Magnum: The REAL Brawl to End it All!

Tully Blanchard v Magnum TA ('I Quit' Cage Match) (Starrcade, 11/28/85)

One of the definitive brawls in wrestling history. This is just a nasty, gritty, seedy masterpiece of a thing. It's only, what, fifteen minutes long? If that? Yet by the end it feels like they've come through a war that lasted a lifetime. It feels so violent and visceral because they don't really work it like a traditional brawl with the kinds of momentum shifts and exchanges you usually see. I actually prefer the Duggan/DiBiase stips match if we're ranking classic US brawls, but that was a pro-wrestling match with the set ups and payoffs slotted in where you'd probably expect. The real set up to this was done in the months leading up to it with Tully being a first class weasel and the payoff was the sort of attempted murder Magnum had been promising all along. This never had your traditional brawling exchanges. The punches were great but they weren't really the driving force. Instead Tully tried to gouge Magnum's eyes out and Magnum tried to bite chunks out of Tully's arm. When they were rolling around on the mat it was the kind of thing you'd expect to see in a fight where two guys were trying to kill each other, especially after the exhaustion had set in. The selling was off the charts from both of them but Tully was unbelievable as a man who'd been forced to find a side of himself he never knew existed. He'd never explored these depths of himself before and he really came across as a guy who would maim Magnum or worse if he needed to. Say what you want about him, but he was the US champ for a reason, he was the top drawer athlete he said he was, and at this point he was sick to death of everything about Magnum TA. The part where he goes for a cover out of instinct is a pretty great example of his mindset. It's like he's sleepwalking through this hell he's been forced into, not really taking in just what exactly he's doing, almost going on muscle memory at points before realising that wrestling acumen ultimately doesn't count for shit if he wants to end this. Then there are the parts where they're shoving the mic in each other's face with all the roaring and screaming. Tully almost sounds like he's pleading with Magnum but of course Magnum is never going to quit, so Tully just cracks him in the head with the mic. Baby Doll covering her face in horror as Tully refuses to quit is such an incredible visual. And that whole ending sequence is pretty much iconic. I mean Tully smashing a chair to bits and trying to stab Magnum in the face was fucking insane, but the finish itself was even wilder than I remembered. I hadn't seen this in about fifteen years and I didn't recall it being so gruesome. After all the shit Tully and Baby Doll had pulled over the last few months you knew Magnum would take it as far as he needed to, but I don't think anybody expected him to try and cut Tully's face off. Just a ridiculous finish and holy cow did Magnum look like the most unfuckwithable human being on the planet afterwards. The way he stood there with that chair leg staring down Tully, Tully rolling around trying to hold his eyeball in place, Baby Doll distraught in the corner...and Magnum drops the weapon, throws his new title over his shoulder, walks out head held high, the people in raptures.