So I picked up the latest Schneider Comp along with the ECW and SMW sets last week. They reached my doorstep the other day, much to my merriment. No idea when I'll dive into the SMW and ECW sets, but the new Schneider Comp looks like it might be the best yet. I'm gonna try and talk about all of it. I'll probably fail or it'll take me seven years, but I'll at least TRY, and that's what's important.
Team Beyond v Aeroform (Beyond Wrestling, 11/5/10)
Pretty much a perfect popcorn match. I'd never seen any of these guys before. Never even heard of Beyond Wrestling. Basically, I had no idea what to expect out of this. For 18 minutes I wound up sitting with a giant smile on my face watching 4 guys run through a fucking truckload of crazy spots and bumps. Some of the shit they were doing was more goofy in a stupid way than in a cool way, but even the stupid stuff was new to me so it at least worked on a "well THAT was different" level. The lucha armdrag sequence at the start between Flip Kendrick and Chase Burnett was really nifty, and Kendrick is a guy that seems freakishly agile. He does a moonsault where he starts off sitting on the mat that looked cool as Hell. Wasn't really a "sitting moonsault," because he didn't exactly moonsault from his ass, but he started there at least. If there's one thing you take away from this it's that Chase Burnett is a fucking bump machine lunatic. He eats a knee RIGHT to the cheekbone from Louis Lyndon, and later on he takes a psychotic flat back flip bump off the apron to the concrete. Zane Silver has a bunch of forearm and backhand slap variations. Some of them look kind of whiffed and crummy, but I'm tickled he'd try them in the first place. Really, considering the sheer amount of stuff - and the difficulty of some of it - they were pulling out of their asses here, it's remarkable they managed to pull off pretty much every spot cleanly. This was a total blast.
LA Park v El Mesias (Mask v Hair) (AAA, 6/18/11)
Well fuck the world, this was absolutely incredible. I'll probably watch it again soon, but on first watch it really felt like the best match of the decade so far. Hell, I'd even put it up there with any of the MOTDC stuff from the last decade as well. Park looked like the best wrestler on earth here, taking insane bumps, bleeding like this was a fucking apuestas match, hurling sick chair shots, brawling like crazy, etc. He starts jawing with some lady in the front row, and they play off that even into the post-match. When she threw a cup in his face it looked like he would've murdered her if Mesias wasn't there to save her. The thing that really impressed me about this (other than the crazy bumps and blood and such) was the way they paced it. Within the first five minutes Mesias has taken two table bumps - one of which looked completely fucking nuts, btw - and by the time they hit the ten minute mark you're wondering what else they can do without it coming off as them just "doin' stuff." Match goes about 30 minutes total, and not once did it seem like they were running out of ideas or just moving from spot to spot. I mean, this was more about them doing crazy shit to each other (not in a spotfesty way) than straight lucha brawling (punch, kick, forehead biting, posting, etc.), but they totally made it work, and at the risk of getting carried away with hyperbole, it honestly felt like one of the most smartly paced matches I've ever seen. Never thought any of the table stuff felt out of place, either. I don't usually like it when guys bring tables and ladders and whatever else into blowoff matches, because a lot of the time it comes across as them just wanting to do cool looking shit. It feels pretty out of place in a hate feud. I watched a bunch of Jimmy Jacobs brawls from that early 2007 ROH run last week. The Cabana match from Chicago and the Whitmer brawls were all crazy, but I started to lose interest once they brought out the tables and ladders. I'd much rather they just kept stabbing each other in the head with rail-road spikes. The reason the falls count anywhere match from Liverpool was my favourite of all those crazy brawls is because they stuck to just beating the ever loving dogshit out of each other (and Whitmer blades his forehead about 15 times) and never bothered with the props. This has several nutso table bumps, but all of them felt like a case of one guy trying to kill the other. The fact they looked totally badass was just a bonus for the people watching this massacre. Park setting up a table in the middle of the ring only to be speared through it was kind of contrived, sure, but he gets up on the table and starts dancing like a shithead. In amongst all this carnage, he still takes the time to do his dance. It might've been contrived, but it was the best set up to a contrived table bump you'll see. Oh and the actual spot looked motherfucking spectacular. And Hell, I even liked the bullshit finish. Just a phenomenal match; maybe the best in the history of the company.
Wednesday, 28 March 2012
Wednesday, 21 March 2012
Bernard v Nagata + Ohtani INVADING!
Giant Bernard v Yuji Nagata (New Japan, 4/30/06)
Man, this was outstanding; totally blew me away. I've liked a lot of the Giant Bernard stuff from Japan that I've seen, but this might be his career performance, and I never really thought he had a match this great in him. It starts out with Nagata trying to hit and move as Bernard swings for the fences. He goes in for the arm, but that leaves him too close and Bernard just mows him down. Bernard's pretty great working on top for the next 6 or 7 minutes, almost like a more mobile Mark Henry at points. A couple times Nagata starts firing back and Bernard cuts him off by uppercutting him right in the throat. When Nagata starts to make his comeback he really lays in the kicks and tosses Bernard with some big suplexes, and that's his opening to go back to the arm. Really dramatic moment when Nagata finally manages to lock in the armbar. Sometimes it can feel like guys are sitting in the hold for too long and it eventually reaches a point where, if they haven't tapped out already, they're not going to. Wasn't the case here, as you could buy the match being over even though it was only about 10 minutes in. He manages to make the ropes and force the break, but his sell job for the rest of the match was great. He tries to hit the powerbomb about 7 times, and it's not until right at the end that he's able to actually get Nagata up for it. Every other time he just about manages it, but the arm gives out and he has to drop him. When he finally hits it he doesn't even get all of it, which I thought was cool. Stretch run is awesome without crossing into overkill territory, plus you've got Nagata trying to go back to the arm in amongst the bomb throwing. Honestly, I thought this was about on par with Nagata's match with Takayama from '02 as far as "Yuji Nagata in Uphill Struggle" matches go. Bernard's on his way back to WWE soon as well. I was excited at the prospect of him matching up with a bunch of guys in the company already, but this has me REALLY stoked. I'm not sure who the WWE equiv of Nagata would be. Punk? Babyface Danielson? No way they should be turning Danielson face again any time soon, but Bernard/Punk could be fucking great.
Mitsuharu Misawa & Kotaro Suzuki v Shinjiro Ohtani & Tatsuhito Takaiwa (NOAH, 3/5/05)
This was the Shinjiro Ohtani show. I mean, everybody was good in it, but Ohtani is such a first class dickhead from word one that he took something that would otherwise be really good and propelled it to greatness. Even when he's standing in the ring before team NOAH have come out he's grabbing the ref' by the scruff of the neck and shoving him around. When he and Misawa get in together they have this awesome little exchange of douchebaggery. Ohtani backs Misawa into the ropes, and as he breaks he shoves Misawa in the chest while shouting "BREAK." When Misawa backs Ohtani into the opposite ropes, he fakes to throw an elbow, then just pats him on the head before breaking clean. Ohtani HATES it and spittle flies from his mouth. The heat section on Kotaro was really good here. Kotaro is a pretty bland junior that I don't really have much desire to watch, but this might be the best he's ever looked. He really leans in to getting elbowed in the face (although it's not like Takaiwa needs an invitation to put his weight behind throwing elbows) and plays a fine spunky underdog. Of course, a lot of that is probably down to Ohtani. He mocks him, beats on him in nasty ways (at one point he sits in a camel clutch position, fish hooks both cheeks and starts yanking back) and cuts him off by kicking him right in the dick. Old man Misawa was pretty awesome as well. Throws elbows like he's Misawa, and the early flurry that rocks Ohtani looked super nasty (Ohtani's awesome sell of it didn't hurt, though). Takaiwa probably popped up a bit too quickly after the last big Kotaro nearfall, and the double powerbomb into death valley driver spot is a combo I hate because it's so glaringly cooperative, but those are minor quibbles. I really wish Ohtani got to stretch out like this way more over the course of the last decade. A guy that's such a natural asshole should be allowed to act like one.
Man, this was outstanding; totally blew me away. I've liked a lot of the Giant Bernard stuff from Japan that I've seen, but this might be his career performance, and I never really thought he had a match this great in him. It starts out with Nagata trying to hit and move as Bernard swings for the fences. He goes in for the arm, but that leaves him too close and Bernard just mows him down. Bernard's pretty great working on top for the next 6 or 7 minutes, almost like a more mobile Mark Henry at points. A couple times Nagata starts firing back and Bernard cuts him off by uppercutting him right in the throat. When Nagata starts to make his comeback he really lays in the kicks and tosses Bernard with some big suplexes, and that's his opening to go back to the arm. Really dramatic moment when Nagata finally manages to lock in the armbar. Sometimes it can feel like guys are sitting in the hold for too long and it eventually reaches a point where, if they haven't tapped out already, they're not going to. Wasn't the case here, as you could buy the match being over even though it was only about 10 minutes in. He manages to make the ropes and force the break, but his sell job for the rest of the match was great. He tries to hit the powerbomb about 7 times, and it's not until right at the end that he's able to actually get Nagata up for it. Every other time he just about manages it, but the arm gives out and he has to drop him. When he finally hits it he doesn't even get all of it, which I thought was cool. Stretch run is awesome without crossing into overkill territory, plus you've got Nagata trying to go back to the arm in amongst the bomb throwing. Honestly, I thought this was about on par with Nagata's match with Takayama from '02 as far as "Yuji Nagata in Uphill Struggle" matches go. Bernard's on his way back to WWE soon as well. I was excited at the prospect of him matching up with a bunch of guys in the company already, but this has me REALLY stoked. I'm not sure who the WWE equiv of Nagata would be. Punk? Babyface Danielson? No way they should be turning Danielson face again any time soon, but Bernard/Punk could be fucking great.
Mitsuharu Misawa & Kotaro Suzuki v Shinjiro Ohtani & Tatsuhito Takaiwa (NOAH, 3/5/05)
This was the Shinjiro Ohtani show. I mean, everybody was good in it, but Ohtani is such a first class dickhead from word one that he took something that would otherwise be really good and propelled it to greatness. Even when he's standing in the ring before team NOAH have come out he's grabbing the ref' by the scruff of the neck and shoving him around. When he and Misawa get in together they have this awesome little exchange of douchebaggery. Ohtani backs Misawa into the ropes, and as he breaks he shoves Misawa in the chest while shouting "BREAK." When Misawa backs Ohtani into the opposite ropes, he fakes to throw an elbow, then just pats him on the head before breaking clean. Ohtani HATES it and spittle flies from his mouth. The heat section on Kotaro was really good here. Kotaro is a pretty bland junior that I don't really have much desire to watch, but this might be the best he's ever looked. He really leans in to getting elbowed in the face (although it's not like Takaiwa needs an invitation to put his weight behind throwing elbows) and plays a fine spunky underdog. Of course, a lot of that is probably down to Ohtani. He mocks him, beats on him in nasty ways (at one point he sits in a camel clutch position, fish hooks both cheeks and starts yanking back) and cuts him off by kicking him right in the dick. Old man Misawa was pretty awesome as well. Throws elbows like he's Misawa, and the early flurry that rocks Ohtani looked super nasty (Ohtani's awesome sell of it didn't hurt, though). Takaiwa probably popped up a bit too quickly after the last big Kotaro nearfall, and the double powerbomb into death valley driver spot is a combo I hate because it's so glaringly cooperative, but those are minor quibbles. I really wish Ohtani got to stretch out like this way more over the course of the last decade. A guy that's such a natural asshole should be allowed to act like one.
Tuesday, 20 March 2012
Rey Flows Like the Blood on a Murder Scene, Like a Syringe on Some Wild Out Shit, to Insert a Fiend
Rey Mysterio v Brock Lesnar (Smackdown!, 12/11/03)
Well this was pretty terrific. These two work the 'big v little' dynamic together about as well as any pair in history. Lesnar just manhandles Rey early on, throwing him across the ring when they tie up, mocking him because he's tiny, and at one point he picks Rey clean up off the ground by his ankle and chucks him across the ring. If you gave someone a real life Super Soldier Serum, you'd get another Brock Lesnar. They do a great Tom and Jerry bit where Lesnar chases Rey in and around the ring for about 30 seconds, and when Lesnar stops to catch his breath the crowd start up a massive "you tapped out" chant (he tapped to the Crossface in a match with Benoit the week before). Couple super nifty spots on the floor as well. First Rey goes for a seated senton off the apron, but Brock catches him and hoists him up for a powerbomb, so Rey rolls through and sort of sunset flips Lesnar back-first into the gueardrail. Then he does another seated senton and hurricanranas him into the ring post. Brock's also a guy that's about as fast and agile as he is freakishly strong, so when he runs at Rey and Rey dropkicks him in the knee to send him flying face-first into the middle turbuckle, you can buy him having built up enough momentum for something like that to actually happen. You don't get that same sense with a lot of the big guys Rey works with (shit, you don't get it with a lot of big guys in general). Eventually Lesnar manages to pluck Rey out the air and takes over by just kicking him in the balls. Everything Brock does looks as nasty and vicious as you'd think. He always had awesome looking offence, but Rey completely hurls himself around for all of it like most guys can't and it makes it stand out even more. Thought the 619 set up was pretty great here as well. First Rey sneaks in a revenge low blow by kicking the middle rope into Lesnar's groin, then he dropkicks him and Lesnar kind of trips and falls across the middle rope (still selling his nads). Rey is still on the apron, so he just runs along it and swings around the ring post to hit it. The string of nearfalls after that gets a TON of heat, then Lesnar catches him again and fucking PLANTS him with a sick powerbomb. The Brock Lock/stretch muffler at the end looked hideous. I mean, fuck, talk about breaking someone in half.
Rey Project
Well this was pretty terrific. These two work the 'big v little' dynamic together about as well as any pair in history. Lesnar just manhandles Rey early on, throwing him across the ring when they tie up, mocking him because he's tiny, and at one point he picks Rey clean up off the ground by his ankle and chucks him across the ring. If you gave someone a real life Super Soldier Serum, you'd get another Brock Lesnar. They do a great Tom and Jerry bit where Lesnar chases Rey in and around the ring for about 30 seconds, and when Lesnar stops to catch his breath the crowd start up a massive "you tapped out" chant (he tapped to the Crossface in a match with Benoit the week before). Couple super nifty spots on the floor as well. First Rey goes for a seated senton off the apron, but Brock catches him and hoists him up for a powerbomb, so Rey rolls through and sort of sunset flips Lesnar back-first into the gueardrail. Then he does another seated senton and hurricanranas him into the ring post. Brock's also a guy that's about as fast and agile as he is freakishly strong, so when he runs at Rey and Rey dropkicks him in the knee to send him flying face-first into the middle turbuckle, you can buy him having built up enough momentum for something like that to actually happen. You don't get that same sense with a lot of the big guys Rey works with (shit, you don't get it with a lot of big guys in general). Eventually Lesnar manages to pluck Rey out the air and takes over by just kicking him in the balls. Everything Brock does looks as nasty and vicious as you'd think. He always had awesome looking offence, but Rey completely hurls himself around for all of it like most guys can't and it makes it stand out even more. Thought the 619 set up was pretty great here as well. First Rey sneaks in a revenge low blow by kicking the middle rope into Lesnar's groin, then he dropkicks him and Lesnar kind of trips and falls across the middle rope (still selling his nads). Rey is still on the apron, so he just runs along it and swings around the ring post to hit it. The string of nearfalls after that gets a TON of heat, then Lesnar catches him again and fucking PLANTS him with a sick powerbomb. The Brock Lock/stretch muffler at the end looked hideous. I mean, fuck, talk about breaking someone in half.
Rey Project
Thursday, 15 March 2012
We Said No Holds Barred, but We Didn't Expect This!
Shawn Michaels v Diesel (WWF In Your House 7: Good Friends, Better Enemies, 4/28/96)
Man, I fucking love this match. Shawn Michaels launching Marty Jannetty through a window while a dude with hedge clippers and horrendous pants stood in awe was what made me a wrestling fan for life. I wouldn't say I'm a massive Michaels fan anymore (though tag worker Michaels is still awesome), but he was my favourite wrestler for a good while growing up, and no matter how many Butch Reeds or Fuerza Guerreras or Volk Hans bump and stooge and tricked-out-matwork their way into my heart, I'll probably always have a soft spot for him. So I will probably always fucking love this match.
He gets bumped and ragdolled around like crazy here. It's interesting to see how Michaels worked with Nash in comparison to how Bret worked with him. Bret seemed to try and get him to work into Bret's 'Bret Hart v Big Man' formula -- he tried to "work with" him as opposed to "work around" him. When Nash was game I thought that turned out pretty great, and he'd do things working opposite Bret that he never would working opposite anyone else (and I don't think Nash was utter dogshit or anything, anyway...although he could stink it up with the worst of them when he wanted to). To say Michaels is going out here and just working around Diesel isn't really fair, since Nash's character is a big reason why this is so good, but Michaels is definitely in full on pinball mode.
Nash is a pretty wonderful scumbag in this, by far the best "character performance" of his career (that I've seen, at least. If there's one better that I've missed I'd be stunned, though). He throws his leather jacket at Vince before the match, trash talks all the way through it, and above all else beats the shit out of Michaels. When he rips Mad Dog Vachon's prosthetic leg off so he can use it as a weapon, even Lawler on commentary can't advocate that shit. "Oh my God...Oh my" (then he goes back to cheering him on 30 seconds later). Offensively he busts out a gigantic sidewalk slam, cracks Shawn right in the spine with a chair, chokes him with Hebnar's belt and hangs him over the top rope (Michaels really HANGS there, and when he's getting choked he doesn't bother using his fingers for any sort of separation. He looked like Justin Roberts that time Daniel Bryan choked him with his own tie on RAW and got fired for it), and in one of my favourite spots of the match he takes the tape off his wrist and just starts choking the ref' (so he can steal his belt).
Michaels' performance is pretty great as well. He ditches the dancing and male stripper routine at the start and actually looks like he's ready for a fight. He even steals one of the announcer's boots and waffles Nash in the head with it. His whole run of offence at the start seemed really fired up, then he takes his upside down bump in the corner, and as Nash clubs him off the apron he goes flying into the railing with an insane Brian Pillman throat bump. The powerbomb through the table spot is probably what this is most remembered for, and it really is a spectacular looking table spot. They don't start clearing the table of monitors and headsets before it, so you don't know it's coming until Nash lifts him up and turns towards it. When Shawn goes through it one of the monitors almost bounces up and hits Vince right in the face. Michaels lies there covered in debris and it looks like a car wreck while Diesel struts around the ring with the WWF title (he even asks Hebnar to put it on him).
The nip up spot is definitely problematic. Vince shouting "JUST LET IT BE OVER!" as Shawn tries to crawl out from under the rubble and drag himself back into the ring is a cool moment, but after everything up to that point...man, if you've just been hurled through a table, whipped and hanged with a belt, taken a ludicrous bump into a guardrail, blasted with a chair, etc., you probably shouldn't be nipping up and bouncing around quite so easily. I've never thought it killed the match or anything, and the nip up spot doesn't bother me a great deal in general, but this was one of the more egregious ones he's ever done.
Still, they don't head to the finish after the big comeback, and Nash blocking the first SCM attempt and mowing him down with a clothesline is one of the best spots of the match, so you take the good with the bad. A little later we also get a great payback spot with Michaels hitting Diesel low as he's about to drill him with Vachon's leg (Diesel hit a low blow earlier on as Michaels was about to smack him with a chair, which was actually a really great cut off spot that I never mentioned).
Every time I watch this I go in thinking I'll like it a little less than before. Then it ends and I wind up liking it a little MORE than before. By far my favourite Nash match ever. Probably one of my top 5 favourite Michaels matches ever. If Shawn had thrown up after he realised he was holding a dude's leg it would've been top 1.
Man, I fucking love this match. Shawn Michaels launching Marty Jannetty through a window while a dude with hedge clippers and horrendous pants stood in awe was what made me a wrestling fan for life. I wouldn't say I'm a massive Michaels fan anymore (though tag worker Michaels is still awesome), but he was my favourite wrestler for a good while growing up, and no matter how many Butch Reeds or Fuerza Guerreras or Volk Hans bump and stooge and tricked-out-matwork their way into my heart, I'll probably always have a soft spot for him. So I will probably always fucking love this match.
He gets bumped and ragdolled around like crazy here. It's interesting to see how Michaels worked with Nash in comparison to how Bret worked with him. Bret seemed to try and get him to work into Bret's 'Bret Hart v Big Man' formula -- he tried to "work with" him as opposed to "work around" him. When Nash was game I thought that turned out pretty great, and he'd do things working opposite Bret that he never would working opposite anyone else (and I don't think Nash was utter dogshit or anything, anyway...although he could stink it up with the worst of them when he wanted to). To say Michaels is going out here and just working around Diesel isn't really fair, since Nash's character is a big reason why this is so good, but Michaels is definitely in full on pinball mode.
Nash is a pretty wonderful scumbag in this, by far the best "character performance" of his career (that I've seen, at least. If there's one better that I've missed I'd be stunned, though). He throws his leather jacket at Vince before the match, trash talks all the way through it, and above all else beats the shit out of Michaels. When he rips Mad Dog Vachon's prosthetic leg off so he can use it as a weapon, even Lawler on commentary can't advocate that shit. "Oh my God...Oh my" (then he goes back to cheering him on 30 seconds later). Offensively he busts out a gigantic sidewalk slam, cracks Shawn right in the spine with a chair, chokes him with Hebnar's belt and hangs him over the top rope (Michaels really HANGS there, and when he's getting choked he doesn't bother using his fingers for any sort of separation. He looked like Justin Roberts that time Daniel Bryan choked him with his own tie on RAW and got fired for it), and in one of my favourite spots of the match he takes the tape off his wrist and just starts choking the ref' (so he can steal his belt).
Michaels' performance is pretty great as well. He ditches the dancing and male stripper routine at the start and actually looks like he's ready for a fight. He even steals one of the announcer's boots and waffles Nash in the head with it. His whole run of offence at the start seemed really fired up, then he takes his upside down bump in the corner, and as Nash clubs him off the apron he goes flying into the railing with an insane Brian Pillman throat bump. The powerbomb through the table spot is probably what this is most remembered for, and it really is a spectacular looking table spot. They don't start clearing the table of monitors and headsets before it, so you don't know it's coming until Nash lifts him up and turns towards it. When Shawn goes through it one of the monitors almost bounces up and hits Vince right in the face. Michaels lies there covered in debris and it looks like a car wreck while Diesel struts around the ring with the WWF title (he even asks Hebnar to put it on him).
The nip up spot is definitely problematic. Vince shouting "JUST LET IT BE OVER!" as Shawn tries to crawl out from under the rubble and drag himself back into the ring is a cool moment, but after everything up to that point...man, if you've just been hurled through a table, whipped and hanged with a belt, taken a ludicrous bump into a guardrail, blasted with a chair, etc., you probably shouldn't be nipping up and bouncing around quite so easily. I've never thought it killed the match or anything, and the nip up spot doesn't bother me a great deal in general, but this was one of the more egregious ones he's ever done.
Still, they don't head to the finish after the big comeback, and Nash blocking the first SCM attempt and mowing him down with a clothesline is one of the best spots of the match, so you take the good with the bad. A little later we also get a great payback spot with Michaels hitting Diesel low as he's about to drill him with Vachon's leg (Diesel hit a low blow earlier on as Michaels was about to smack him with a chair, which was actually a really great cut off spot that I never mentioned).
Every time I watch this I go in thinking I'll like it a little less than before. Then it ends and I wind up liking it a little MORE than before. By far my favourite Nash match ever. Probably one of my top 5 favourite Michaels matches ever. If Shawn had thrown up after he realised he was holding a dude's leg it would've been top 1.
Tuesday, 13 March 2012
Rey Got News for You All, Let Him Show You how to Ball. See the Legendary Fall? He Ain't Heard of That
Rey Mysterio v Luke Gallows (Smackdown!, 3/5/10)
This feels like quite the Luke Gallows showcase. I didn't see a ton of Gallows in his SES role, but he was pretty fucking rad here and Rey made his already-good offence look totally killer. There's a super cool spot where he shoves Rey into the ropes and hits a monster clothesline from him knees, which sort of reminded me of the awesome spot in the Rey/Henry match I talked about a few days ago. He spends a chunk of time working over Rey's back in pretty nasty looking ways here. He initially takes over by grabbing Rey, running him along the apron and throwing him spine-first into the post. When he's in control he hits a fallaway slam, squeezes him with a bearhug and throws some great looking headbutts right to the spine and kidneys. He also throws some killer punches -- Rey jumps off the top at one point and Gallows catches him with an AWESOME uppercut. Thought the set up to the 619 was really cool here as well. First Rey hooks in a guillotine choke, and when Gallows gets to the ropes he still sells grogginess. While he's shaking the cobwebs Rey chop blocks him and Gallows falls into position for the 619. I don't remember seeing it set up like that before, but it was one of the more organic set ups for it I've seen. Serena jumps in the way as Rey is about to hit it, and when Punk sneaks in the back door it looks like we're heading for a screwy finish. Instead, Gallows tries to powerbomb Rey, but Rey manages to shift his weight and score a flash pin. A friend of mine has been at me to watch this for about two years now, and it was as nifty as I'd hoped. Everything pre-commercial is good, but it really hits another gear after that sweet apron/post spot.
Rey Project
This feels like quite the Luke Gallows showcase. I didn't see a ton of Gallows in his SES role, but he was pretty fucking rad here and Rey made his already-good offence look totally killer. There's a super cool spot where he shoves Rey into the ropes and hits a monster clothesline from him knees, which sort of reminded me of the awesome spot in the Rey/Henry match I talked about a few days ago. He spends a chunk of time working over Rey's back in pretty nasty looking ways here. He initially takes over by grabbing Rey, running him along the apron and throwing him spine-first into the post. When he's in control he hits a fallaway slam, squeezes him with a bearhug and throws some great looking headbutts right to the spine and kidneys. He also throws some killer punches -- Rey jumps off the top at one point and Gallows catches him with an AWESOME uppercut. Thought the set up to the 619 was really cool here as well. First Rey hooks in a guillotine choke, and when Gallows gets to the ropes he still sells grogginess. While he's shaking the cobwebs Rey chop blocks him and Gallows falls into position for the 619. I don't remember seeing it set up like that before, but it was one of the more organic set ups for it I've seen. Serena jumps in the way as Rey is about to hit it, and when Punk sneaks in the back door it looks like we're heading for a screwy finish. Instead, Gallows tries to powerbomb Rey, but Rey manages to shift his weight and score a flash pin. A friend of mine has been at me to watch this for about two years now, and it was as nifty as I'd hoped. Everything pre-commercial is good, but it really hits another gear after that sweet apron/post spot.
Rey Project
Monday, 12 March 2012
They Form a Huddle, Whisper Like They Want Trouble, Rey Melts the Ice Grills Into Rainwater Puddles
Rey Mysterio & Edge v Brock Lesnar & Tajiri (Smackdown!, 10/10/02)
I had no idea this ever happened. I mean, I went back and watched a shit load of the Smackdown! stuff from this period a couple years ago, but I never came across this. It goes about ten minutes, has a really hot crowd, and Brock Lesnar fucking kills dudes. I had forgotten just how much of an athletic freak that guy was. He and Rey always used to have great interactions any time they wound up in the ring together (their TV match from '03 was awesome), and Brock just absolutely manhandles him at a couple points here. Rey tries to scurry away from him by crawling under his legs, but Brock grabs him, hurls him in the air with his ankles and slams him right down on his shoulder. Then in the post-match, from the floor, he tosses Rey over his head back into the ring, and Rey almost clears the top rope. Just inhuman strength. He and Tajiri make a super fun team. Tajiri chills on the apron until Lesnar mows down Rey and Edge, then he tags in and tells Brock he'll handle it from here...if that's okay with him. He throws a couple jaw-shattering kicks and there's a tarantula spot that looked pretty organic. When he fucks up by accidentally blasting Lesnar with a kick, he makes this AMAZING "oh fuck what have I done?" face while biting his fingers. Post-match Lesnar kills him for it, naturally. Edge was fine here, too. He takes a monster overhead belly to belly on the floor (from guess who) and Tajiri at least makes his spear look decent enough, so I can deal. Did Brock and Tajiri ever have a singles match together? That had to have been good, surely? Also feel like I owe it to myself to watch everything Rey and Lesnar ever did together.
Rey Project
I had no idea this ever happened. I mean, I went back and watched a shit load of the Smackdown! stuff from this period a couple years ago, but I never came across this. It goes about ten minutes, has a really hot crowd, and Brock Lesnar fucking kills dudes. I had forgotten just how much of an athletic freak that guy was. He and Rey always used to have great interactions any time they wound up in the ring together (their TV match from '03 was awesome), and Brock just absolutely manhandles him at a couple points here. Rey tries to scurry away from him by crawling under his legs, but Brock grabs him, hurls him in the air with his ankles and slams him right down on his shoulder. Then in the post-match, from the floor, he tosses Rey over his head back into the ring, and Rey almost clears the top rope. Just inhuman strength. He and Tajiri make a super fun team. Tajiri chills on the apron until Lesnar mows down Rey and Edge, then he tags in and tells Brock he'll handle it from here...if that's okay with him. He throws a couple jaw-shattering kicks and there's a tarantula spot that looked pretty organic. When he fucks up by accidentally blasting Lesnar with a kick, he makes this AMAZING "oh fuck what have I done?" face while biting his fingers. Post-match Lesnar kills him for it, naturally. Edge was fine here, too. He takes a monster overhead belly to belly on the floor (from guess who) and Tajiri at least makes his spear look decent enough, so I can deal. Did Brock and Tajiri ever have a singles match together? That had to have been good, surely? Also feel like I owe it to myself to watch everything Rey and Lesnar ever did together.
Rey Project
Friday, 9 March 2012
Rey Terrorises the Jam Like Troops in Pakistan, Swingin' Through Ya Town Like Ya Neighbourhood Spiiiiiidaman
Rey Mysterio v Drew McIntyre (Smackdown!, 3/11/11)
This only goes about 8 minutes, and with the commercial break we miss a few of those minutes, but shit, this was a really great little match. Drew looked awesome here and I really wish they'd actually DO something with him (apparently they are now...maybe? I don't really know). He wastes Rey with a boot to the head right at the start (and laughs about it), hits an awesome tilt-a-whirl backbreaker, bends Rey with a bow and arrow, talks a bunch of trash, and fucking KILLS him with a backbreaker on the apron. He's a guy that has a TON of cool and interesting ways to hurt you (the Christian matches from a couple years ago are good examples). He also sets himself up for the 619 here in a way that doesn't look nearly as contrived as set ups for that move usually do. Rey does what he does and is as great a whipping boy as always - takes a Hell of a bump off a missed springboard where he jumps about 90 feet in the air and plummets face first to the mat - and I'd love it for these two to get 20 minutes, because I can't imagine that not ruling.
Rey Project
This only goes about 8 minutes, and with the commercial break we miss a few of those minutes, but shit, this was a really great little match. Drew looked awesome here and I really wish they'd actually DO something with him (apparently they are now...maybe? I don't really know). He wastes Rey with a boot to the head right at the start (and laughs about it), hits an awesome tilt-a-whirl backbreaker, bends Rey with a bow and arrow, talks a bunch of trash, and fucking KILLS him with a backbreaker on the apron. He's a guy that has a TON of cool and interesting ways to hurt you (the Christian matches from a couple years ago are good examples). He also sets himself up for the 619 here in a way that doesn't look nearly as contrived as set ups for that move usually do. Rey does what he does and is as great a whipping boy as always - takes a Hell of a bump off a missed springboard where he jumps about 90 feet in the air and plummets face first to the mat - and I'd love it for these two to get 20 minutes, because I can't imagine that not ruling.
Rey Project
Wednesday, 7 March 2012
In the Glow of the Moon, Over the Melancholy Metro Rey's Poetry is Set Like a U.F.O.
20 Man Battle Royal (Smackdown!, 1/13/06)
Super fun TV battle royal. Rey and Mark Henry are really your stars here. First ten minutes have a bunch going on, but Rey's near-eliminations and running around like a mouse while Henry plays monster truck in amongst stock cars are the two main themes. Angle comes in as the mystery entrant (this is for the World Heavyweight Title that Batista vacated earlier in the night) and throws people around, but eventually Henry gets fed up with that and puts him through a table. Henry is a total beast in this. He does a shoulder tackle spot with Lashley where Lashley REALLY runs at him and still ends up getting bounced across the ring. There was nothing showy about it -- he really charged full speed at Henry, Henry just stood his ground, and Lashley almost got knocked clean off his feet. Henry picks him up like he's nothing, dumps him onto the apron and punts him right in the chest. He totally ragdolls everybody else (tossed out Brian Kendrick like he was a six year old). After everybody else is gone it briefly comes down to Henry and Rey, and we get a great taste of what a singles match would be like before Rey flies around once too often and gets hurled over the top. Finally ends up being Henry v Angle (Angle spent half the match on top of a broken announce table), and Angle is a total pitbull going back to the headscissors. Still, you watch this and get the sense a Rey/Henry match would be really great...
Rey Mysterio v Mark Henry (Smackdown!, 1/20/06)
And sure enough, it was really great. Just an awesome huge guy v tiny guy match; at times it's like a rabbit trying to pick a fight with a bear. Rey tries to get Henry to chase him around early and burn him out, winging kicks at his tree trunk legs to chop him down some. There's a spot where Henry catches Rey by the ankle as he's sliding into the ring and, with one hand, just yanks him back out with so much force Rey goes flying into the barricade. Henry takes over completely when Rey runs towards him, and Henry stops him cold in his tracks Vader style. People should stop running at that guy. It's bad enough standing in front of him, I have no idea why you'd actively want to close the gap. If a bus is driving towards you, don't run INTO the fucking windshield. Henry looks like the most unfuckwithable brick wall on earth here. He gives Rey a slingshot suplex where he hangs him over the top rope and cracks his sternum with a kick (Rey's bump to the floor is great as well). Awesome spot where Rey starts building some momentum and Henry mows him down with a huge leaping clothesline. He was kind of on his knees when he jumped into it, so it looked totally out of nowhere and amazing. Really liked the teeter-totter set up to the 619 here as well. Henry catches Rey's attempted springboard like he did in the battle royal, but this time Rey manages to hotshot Henry on the top rope as he's being thrown out. Then Rey hits three 619s; one to the kidneys, one to the stomach, and finally one to the face. Finish is great. Rey hits the frog splash from about three quarters of the way across the ring, but as he pins him Henry just sits up, rolls backwards onto his feet while still holding onto Rey, and crushes him dead with the World's Strongest Slam. Rey sort of whiffs on the frog splash because he's too far away, but it actually kinda adds to the finish. You've got one shot against this guy, you either make it count or you're toast.
Rey Project
Super fun TV battle royal. Rey and Mark Henry are really your stars here. First ten minutes have a bunch going on, but Rey's near-eliminations and running around like a mouse while Henry plays monster truck in amongst stock cars are the two main themes. Angle comes in as the mystery entrant (this is for the World Heavyweight Title that Batista vacated earlier in the night) and throws people around, but eventually Henry gets fed up with that and puts him through a table. Henry is a total beast in this. He does a shoulder tackle spot with Lashley where Lashley REALLY runs at him and still ends up getting bounced across the ring. There was nothing showy about it -- he really charged full speed at Henry, Henry just stood his ground, and Lashley almost got knocked clean off his feet. Henry picks him up like he's nothing, dumps him onto the apron and punts him right in the chest. He totally ragdolls everybody else (tossed out Brian Kendrick like he was a six year old). After everybody else is gone it briefly comes down to Henry and Rey, and we get a great taste of what a singles match would be like before Rey flies around once too often and gets hurled over the top. Finally ends up being Henry v Angle (Angle spent half the match on top of a broken announce table), and Angle is a total pitbull going back to the headscissors. Still, you watch this and get the sense a Rey/Henry match would be really great...
Rey Mysterio v Mark Henry (Smackdown!, 1/20/06)
And sure enough, it was really great. Just an awesome huge guy v tiny guy match; at times it's like a rabbit trying to pick a fight with a bear. Rey tries to get Henry to chase him around early and burn him out, winging kicks at his tree trunk legs to chop him down some. There's a spot where Henry catches Rey by the ankle as he's sliding into the ring and, with one hand, just yanks him back out with so much force Rey goes flying into the barricade. Henry takes over completely when Rey runs towards him, and Henry stops him cold in his tracks Vader style. People should stop running at that guy. It's bad enough standing in front of him, I have no idea why you'd actively want to close the gap. If a bus is driving towards you, don't run INTO the fucking windshield. Henry looks like the most unfuckwithable brick wall on earth here. He gives Rey a slingshot suplex where he hangs him over the top rope and cracks his sternum with a kick (Rey's bump to the floor is great as well). Awesome spot where Rey starts building some momentum and Henry mows him down with a huge leaping clothesline. He was kind of on his knees when he jumped into it, so it looked totally out of nowhere and amazing. Really liked the teeter-totter set up to the 619 here as well. Henry catches Rey's attempted springboard like he did in the battle royal, but this time Rey manages to hotshot Henry on the top rope as he's being thrown out. Then Rey hits three 619s; one to the kidneys, one to the stomach, and finally one to the face. Finish is great. Rey hits the frog splash from about three quarters of the way across the ring, but as he pins him Henry just sits up, rolls backwards onto his feet while still holding onto Rey, and crushes him dead with the World's Strongest Slam. Rey sort of whiffs on the frog splash because he's too far away, but it actually kinda adds to the finish. You've got one shot against this guy, you either make it count or you're toast.
Rey Project
Tuesday, 6 March 2012
Rey Rose Early Mornin', Spread His Wings Yawnin', Vague Memory of Last Night, Now it's All Dawnin'
Rey Mysterio v Kurt Angle (Smackdown!, 3/31/06)
So this is about 6 months before WWE released Angle, and hindsight being a beautiful thing and everything, you can kind off see why Vince half expected him to die in the ring at some point. His arms look a bit Paul Orndorffy and you see him squeezing some feeling into his fingers after a few flat back bumps. I have no idea how he still has full use of his limbs 6 years later. I'd have bet money he'd be at least a hemiplegic by now. Match starts out with Angle taking Rey down and grounding him, and if there's one thing I'll say about Angle it's that he projects an aura of a guy that'll tear your arms off on the mat (looking like an ACTUAL psychopath helps). Rey catches him off guard with a springboard armdrag here and there. First Angle smiles in acknowledgement, then he gets annoyed and just launches Rey into the barricade. He spends the rest of the match working over Rey's midsection with a tight looking bodyscissors, some takedowns with real snap, and adds a bunch of nasty touches like grinding his forearm across Rey's eyes while he squeezes his ribs with his legs. Felt pretty Finlayesque, which you know I'll get behind. I was setting myself up to be disappointed when it looked like they were going with an Anglefied finishing run, but lo and behold there were only two counters out of finishers before Angle plucks Rey out the air and grapevines the leg for the tap out. This was pretty fucking good. I don't really have any interest in watching Angle at this stage, but Rey's a good match-up for him. Might actually be his most consistently good opponent. I'd still take the best Angle/Austin match over the best Angle/Rey match, but I'd rather watch the third or fourth best match Angle and Rey had together than the third or fourth best Angle and Austin had.
Rey Project
So this is about 6 months before WWE released Angle, and hindsight being a beautiful thing and everything, you can kind off see why Vince half expected him to die in the ring at some point. His arms look a bit Paul Orndorffy and you see him squeezing some feeling into his fingers after a few flat back bumps. I have no idea how he still has full use of his limbs 6 years later. I'd have bet money he'd be at least a hemiplegic by now. Match starts out with Angle taking Rey down and grounding him, and if there's one thing I'll say about Angle it's that he projects an aura of a guy that'll tear your arms off on the mat (looking like an ACTUAL psychopath helps). Rey catches him off guard with a springboard armdrag here and there. First Angle smiles in acknowledgement, then he gets annoyed and just launches Rey into the barricade. He spends the rest of the match working over Rey's midsection with a tight looking bodyscissors, some takedowns with real snap, and adds a bunch of nasty touches like grinding his forearm across Rey's eyes while he squeezes his ribs with his legs. Felt pretty Finlayesque, which you know I'll get behind. I was setting myself up to be disappointed when it looked like they were going with an Anglefied finishing run, but lo and behold there were only two counters out of finishers before Angle plucks Rey out the air and grapevines the leg for the tap out. This was pretty fucking good. I don't really have any interest in watching Angle at this stage, but Rey's a good match-up for him. Might actually be his most consistently good opponent. I'd still take the best Angle/Austin match over the best Angle/Rey match, but I'd rather watch the third or fourth best match Angle and Rey had together than the third or fourth best Angle and Austin had.
Rey Project
Monday, 5 March 2012
The Motherfucking Rey Mysterio Project!
So I was watching some random Smackdown! matches from 2006 last night, and I got to thinking about whether there have been any guys in the world that have been as consistently good over the last 10 years as Rey Mysterio. Couldn't think of anybody in WWE. Only other guy from America that is fucking with him is probably Danielson. Wrestling in Japan has steadily gotten worse and worse to the point where there's barely a handful of guys I'm interested in watching at this point. There's probably a few guys from Mexico, but I didn't watch a good deal of lucha from '00-'08, so that's a blind spot.
Point is, Rey has been fucking awesome since he came to WWE in 2002 (not that he was shitty before that) and one of the most "sure thing" guys in the world from that point on (when he's not having knee surgery or tearing all of his muscles, anyway).
I've seen most of his WWE run already, but there ALWAYS seems to be WWE Mysterio stuff popping up that winds up being at least interesting that I'd never even heard of before. Plus I want an excuse to re-watch all of the stuff I already know I like. So here we go again.
Same deal as the Finlay project in that I'm only going to focus on his WWE run. I'll break it all down the same as that as well, with the best stuff being in the top tier and the "worst" stuff being in the fourth/bottom tier. I've already talked about a bunch of Rey matches here already (watched a few for the Finlay project), so I'll just link to those over time. The goal is to have everything watched and listed before I'm dead (so I give it about 10 years).
Rey Mysterio v Brock Lesnar (Smackdown!, 12/11/03)
Rey Mysterio v Eddie Guerrero (Smackdown!, 3/18/04)
Rey Mysterio v Jamie Noble (Velocity, 5/1/04)
Rey Mysterio v Chavo Guerrero (Great American Bash, 6/27/04)
Rey Mysterio v Jamie Noble (Velocity, 5/1/04)
Rey Mysterio v Chavo Guerrero (Great American Bash, 6/27/04)
Rey Mysterio v Eddie Guerrero (Judgment Day, 5/22/05)
Rey Mysterio v Eddie Guerrero (Smackdown!, 6/23/05)
Rey Mysterio v Eddie Guerrero (Great American Bash, 7/24/05)
Rey Mysterio & Batista v MNM (Smackdown!, 12/30/05)
Rey Mysterio v Mark Henry (Smackdown!, 1/20/06)
Rey Mysterio v Eddie Guerrero (Smackdown!, 6/23/05)
Rey Mysterio v Eddie Guerrero (Great American Bash, 7/24/05)
Rey Mysterio & Batista v MNM (Smackdown!, 12/30/05)
Rey Mysterio v Mark Henry (Smackdown!, 1/20/06)
Rey Mysterio v CM Punk (Rey Joins S.E.S v Punk's Hair) (Over the Limit, 5/23/10)
Rey Mysterio v John Cena (RAW, 7/26/11)
Rey Mysterio v Tajiri (Smackdown!, 9/4/03)
Rey Mysterio v Tajiri (Smackdown!, 9/25/03)
20 Man Battle Royal (Smackdown!, 1/13/06)
Rey Mysterio, Chris Benoit & Bobby Lashley v Finlay, JBL & Randy Orton (Smackdown!, 2/24/06)
Rey Mysterio v Kurt Angle (Smackdown!, 3/31/06)
Rey Mysterio v Finlay (Smackdown!, 9/8/06)
Rey Mysterio v The Undertaker (Royal Rumble, 1/31/10)
Rey Mysterio v Cody Rhodes (Falls Count Anywhere) (Extreme Rules, 5/1/11)
Rey Mysterio, Edge & John Cena v Eddie Guerrero, Chris Benoit & Kurt Angle (Smackdown!, 8/8/02)
Rey Mysterio & Edge v Brock Lesnar & Tajiri (Smackdown!, 10/10/02)
Rey Mysterio v Luke Gallows (Smackdown!, 3/5/10)
Rey Mysterio v Drew McIntyre (Smackdown!, 3/11/11)
Rey Mysterio v Cody Rhodes (Wrestlemania XXVII, 4/3/11)
Rey Mysterio, Kofi Kingston & John Morrison v The Miz, Alberto Del Rio & R-Truth (Summerslam, 8/14/11)
Rey Mysterio & Eddie Guerrero v MNM (Smackdown!, 7/7/05)
Rey Mysterio v John Cena (RAW, 7/26/11)
Rey Mysterio v Tajiri (Smackdown!, 9/4/03)
Rey Mysterio v Tajiri (Smackdown!, 9/25/03)
20 Man Battle Royal (Smackdown!, 1/13/06)
Rey Mysterio, Chris Benoit & Bobby Lashley v Finlay, JBL & Randy Orton (Smackdown!, 2/24/06)
Rey Mysterio v Kurt Angle (Smackdown!, 3/31/06)
Rey Mysterio v Finlay (Smackdown!, 9/8/06)
Rey Mysterio v The Undertaker (Royal Rumble, 1/31/10)
Rey Mysterio v Cody Rhodes (Falls Count Anywhere) (Extreme Rules, 5/1/11)
Rey Mysterio, Edge & John Cena v Eddie Guerrero, Chris Benoit & Kurt Angle (Smackdown!, 8/8/02)
Rey Mysterio & Edge v Brock Lesnar & Tajiri (Smackdown!, 10/10/02)
Rey Mysterio v Luke Gallows (Smackdown!, 3/5/10)
Rey Mysterio v Drew McIntyre (Smackdown!, 3/11/11)
Rey Mysterio v Cody Rhodes (Wrestlemania XXVII, 4/3/11)
Rey Mysterio, Kofi Kingston & John Morrison v The Miz, Alberto Del Rio & R-Truth (Summerslam, 8/14/11)
Rey Mysterio & Eddie Guerrero v MNM (Smackdown!, 7/7/05)
Friday, 2 March 2012
In Comes Romeo, He's Moaning 'You Belong to Me I Believe,' and Finlay Says 'You're in the Wrong Place, my Friend, You Better Leave'
Finlay v Bobby Lashley (Smackdown!, 5/12/06)
Is Finlay Lashley's best ever opponent? I remember that Cena match from the Great American Bash 2007 being a really good WWE Style Main Event, but I've seen a bunch of Finlay/Lashley matches now and they all felt really rugged. You get the sense the Bash match with Cena had a Pat Patterson laying things out beforehand and Cena doing the rest. The Finlay matches feel more like uncooperative fights. This is probably the best of those matches, and while Lashley hangs around and looks pretty good hitting his stuff and being roided out of his eyeballs, it's more or less a Finlay show. He controls most of this by doing a bunch of super nasty looking shit. Even when he's working a headlock Finlay looks like he's trying to hurt you. When he grabs hold of it he makes sure to really clamp his arms tight around your head and jerk your neck. He works a Fujiwara armbar and digs the point of his elbow into Lashley's shoulder joint. Then he just hauls off and punts him right in the spine (sounded like a gun blast). Lashley's a guy that never really seemed all that imposing despite the fact he was made up entirely of human growth hormone and built like Conan (that's Conan the Barbarian, Conan with a 'C'; not Konan with a 'K', shittiest wrestler in the history of the universe...although he was jacked to high Hell as well). Maybe it's because he sounded like a 12 year old and had the charisma of a tree stump. It's not like he was Mark Henry-level imposing here, but he hits real hard (pretty much a pre-requisite against Finlay) and busts out a great looking gutbuster from a gorilla press. And his spear looked as good as I've ever seen it, too. Basically he was a decent compliment to the best wrestler in the world at the time, and that is about all I can ask for.
Finlay Project
Is Finlay Lashley's best ever opponent? I remember that Cena match from the Great American Bash 2007 being a really good WWE Style Main Event, but I've seen a bunch of Finlay/Lashley matches now and they all felt really rugged. You get the sense the Bash match with Cena had a Pat Patterson laying things out beforehand and Cena doing the rest. The Finlay matches feel more like uncooperative fights. This is probably the best of those matches, and while Lashley hangs around and looks pretty good hitting his stuff and being roided out of his eyeballs, it's more or less a Finlay show. He controls most of this by doing a bunch of super nasty looking shit. Even when he's working a headlock Finlay looks like he's trying to hurt you. When he grabs hold of it he makes sure to really clamp his arms tight around your head and jerk your neck. He works a Fujiwara armbar and digs the point of his elbow into Lashley's shoulder joint. Then he just hauls off and punts him right in the spine (sounded like a gun blast). Lashley's a guy that never really seemed all that imposing despite the fact he was made up entirely of human growth hormone and built like Conan (that's Conan the Barbarian, Conan with a 'C'; not Konan with a 'K', shittiest wrestler in the history of the universe...although he was jacked to high Hell as well). Maybe it's because he sounded like a 12 year old and had the charisma of a tree stump. It's not like he was Mark Henry-level imposing here, but he hits real hard (pretty much a pre-requisite against Finlay) and busts out a great looking gutbuster from a gorilla press. And his spear looked as good as I've ever seen it, too. Basically he was a decent compliment to the best wrestler in the world at the time, and that is about all I can ask for.
Finlay Project
Thursday, 1 March 2012
Roughneck, Fit Finlay's on the Set, The Rebel, I Make More Noise Than Heavy Metal
Finlay v Rey Mysterio (Smackdown!, 3/24/06)
Finlay/Rey is a really awesome match-up, and this might be their best match together. WWE Rey Mysterio is obviously less about doing crazy shit and innovating this or that or the other than WCW Rey Mysterio was. WWE Rey Mysterio is all about selling from the bottom and making comebacks. He's a guy you can stick in there with practically anybody WWE's had on their roster for as long as he's been there and it'd result in something at least watchable. Ideally you (or at least I) want him in there with someone that can lay down a good beating...and who lays down a better beating than Fit Finlay? Match goes about 15 minutes and Finlay just beats the holy fuck out of Rey for almost all of it, while Rey does what he does and throws in his hope spots and comebacks. When these guys wrestle it feels less like Rey is being "worked over" -- he's being straight up BULLIED. Finlay just launches him spine-first into the barricade and starts working over his neck and back a bit. It's the kind of thing aspiring pro-wrestlers watch and think "nah, on second thought I'll just take that job at McDonald's. I'd rather flip burgers and spit on chicken nuggets than have Fit Finlay stretch me until my chin touches my nipples." He throws a forearm uppercut right to Rey's neck at one point and it looked just motherfucking ungodly. Rey also seemed to ramp up the stiffness on his end any time he'd work with Finlay, and he really lays in a few shots here. Finlay tries to roll him up with a sunset flip, but Rey rolls all the way through and completely blasts his ear off with a roundhouse kick. The 619 isn't something that looks good in a "holy shit I buy THAT knocking someone out" kind of way very often, but Finlay takes it like a fucking man; two shins square in the nose. Finish is screwy, but for a screwy finish that would be pretty hard to nail perfectly, this was nailed pretty much perfectly.
Finlay Project
Finlay/Rey is a really awesome match-up, and this might be their best match together. WWE Rey Mysterio is obviously less about doing crazy shit and innovating this or that or the other than WCW Rey Mysterio was. WWE Rey Mysterio is all about selling from the bottom and making comebacks. He's a guy you can stick in there with practically anybody WWE's had on their roster for as long as he's been there and it'd result in something at least watchable. Ideally you (or at least I) want him in there with someone that can lay down a good beating...and who lays down a better beating than Fit Finlay? Match goes about 15 minutes and Finlay just beats the holy fuck out of Rey for almost all of it, while Rey does what he does and throws in his hope spots and comebacks. When these guys wrestle it feels less like Rey is being "worked over" -- he's being straight up BULLIED. Finlay just launches him spine-first into the barricade and starts working over his neck and back a bit. It's the kind of thing aspiring pro-wrestlers watch and think "nah, on second thought I'll just take that job at McDonald's. I'd rather flip burgers and spit on chicken nuggets than have Fit Finlay stretch me until my chin touches my nipples." He throws a forearm uppercut right to Rey's neck at one point and it looked just motherfucking ungodly. Rey also seemed to ramp up the stiffness on his end any time he'd work with Finlay, and he really lays in a few shots here. Finlay tries to roll him up with a sunset flip, but Rey rolls all the way through and completely blasts his ear off with a roundhouse kick. The 619 isn't something that looks good in a "holy shit I buy THAT knocking someone out" kind of way very often, but Finlay takes it like a fucking man; two shins square in the nose. Finish is screwy, but for a screwy finish that would be pretty hard to nail perfectly, this was nailed pretty much perfectly.
Finlay Project
Tuesday, 28 February 2012
RAW Stuff From '94! No Catchy Title!
The Quebecers v Razor Ramon & 123 Kid (RAW, 2/21/94)
My fears were confirmed: Jannetty went and got fired before he and Razor could wrestle the Quebecers. But then the 123 Kid takes his place and that's about as good a replacement as we could've gotten. On the one hand Kid isn't as good a tag wrestler as Jannetty. On the other hand he was REALLY good in '94. Either way, this turned out to be as good as I was hoping. Razor has a pretty uninspired FIP spell, and going through all of this stuff he hasn't really looked, like...good. Hasn't been terrible, but I'm not sure 1994 Razor Ramon would make the top 25 WWE wrestlers of 2012. Still, he and Kid have some neat double-teams, like Razor fallaway slamming Kid onto Pierre, and he only gets worked over for a few minutes before they head into a longer heat segment on Kid. Kid is miles better as a FIP than Razor. He just bumps and sells his ass off for everything. He's still nursing the leg injury that kept him out of the Rumble and is visibly limping, so the Quebecers zero right in on it -- Jacques slams Pierre straight on his knee at one point, they repeatedly stomp on it, etc. Finish is screwy and they almost mistime it, so you've got Michaels running through the crowd and hopping the rail at a million miles an hour just to get in the ring and break up the pin. Really, this was a Hell of a match. I was psyched about it when it was announced, then my excitement died a little when Jannetty got canned, but then Kid stood in for him and I was psyched again...and it totally lived up to my expectations.
Bret Hart v Tom Prichard (RAW, 2/21/94)
This was okay. All really basic, but it got plenty of time and built well. Bret controls early by always going back to the arm. He slips out of a headlock and hammerlocks Tom's arm; he armdrags him down and bars it; he applies a top wristlock and takes him down to keep him grounded, etc. It's the kind of stuff you've seen in a thousand Bret matches, but it keeps things moving along nicely and they don't waste a ton of time sitting idly in holds. Eventually Prichard takes over, and there's a nasty looking spot where Cornetee winds up the tennis racket to take a pop at Bret, but Savage jumps up form the announce desk and rips it out of his hand, and Cornette stumbles back and falls into the steps, smacking the back of head on the way down. Bret ends up on the floor, so Owen comes down and tosses him back in the ring. Then as he's walking back up the aisle Bret scores the win, and Owen makes a bunch of pissed off faces. He thought he was throwing him back in so Prichard could finish him off...then THAT happens? Wasn't the plan. They tease a scrap there and then, but the refs keep them apart. Their match for 'Mania has been built up pretty well. They built to the Owen turn well, then the turn came off great, and Bret has been good as a guy that doesn't want to fight his little brother, but has resigned himself to the fact that it has to happen. Owen continually acting like a little shit is only making it easier to accept.
Randy Savage v Yokozuna (RAW, 2/28/94)
This started the show and it was GREAT. Savage is super fired up and you can just tell he's psyched to be wrestling on TV again. Vince seemed to have been trying to phase him out for about a year and a half at this point, but he still looks like one of the best wrestlers in the company. They should've put him in a programme with Bigelow and had them beat the shit out of each other for a million years. Yoko bumps and flings himself around like an absolute trooper here, taking a huge faceplant airball bump off a missed splash, hurling himself out to the floor, etc. Savage has to stick and move and flies around like a bearded pinball. Crowd is crazy hot for all of it as well. We get shenanigans at the finish with a salt bucket shot and run-ins, but Savage is amazing in the post-match trying to get at Crush, taking wild swings and spitting on him. There aren't many guys that sell "I want to tear your head from your shoulders" quite like Savage, and I'm definitely looking forward to seeing the Wrestlemania match. I fucking love Savage, Yoko was boss, and this was really good.
1994 WWF Project
My fears were confirmed: Jannetty went and got fired before he and Razor could wrestle the Quebecers. But then the 123 Kid takes his place and that's about as good a replacement as we could've gotten. On the one hand Kid isn't as good a tag wrestler as Jannetty. On the other hand he was REALLY good in '94. Either way, this turned out to be as good as I was hoping. Razor has a pretty uninspired FIP spell, and going through all of this stuff he hasn't really looked, like...good. Hasn't been terrible, but I'm not sure 1994 Razor Ramon would make the top 25 WWE wrestlers of 2012. Still, he and Kid have some neat double-teams, like Razor fallaway slamming Kid onto Pierre, and he only gets worked over for a few minutes before they head into a longer heat segment on Kid. Kid is miles better as a FIP than Razor. He just bumps and sells his ass off for everything. He's still nursing the leg injury that kept him out of the Rumble and is visibly limping, so the Quebecers zero right in on it -- Jacques slams Pierre straight on his knee at one point, they repeatedly stomp on it, etc. Finish is screwy and they almost mistime it, so you've got Michaels running through the crowd and hopping the rail at a million miles an hour just to get in the ring and break up the pin. Really, this was a Hell of a match. I was psyched about it when it was announced, then my excitement died a little when Jannetty got canned, but then Kid stood in for him and I was psyched again...and it totally lived up to my expectations.
Bret Hart v Tom Prichard (RAW, 2/21/94)
This was okay. All really basic, but it got plenty of time and built well. Bret controls early by always going back to the arm. He slips out of a headlock and hammerlocks Tom's arm; he armdrags him down and bars it; he applies a top wristlock and takes him down to keep him grounded, etc. It's the kind of stuff you've seen in a thousand Bret matches, but it keeps things moving along nicely and they don't waste a ton of time sitting idly in holds. Eventually Prichard takes over, and there's a nasty looking spot where Cornetee winds up the tennis racket to take a pop at Bret, but Savage jumps up form the announce desk and rips it out of his hand, and Cornette stumbles back and falls into the steps, smacking the back of head on the way down. Bret ends up on the floor, so Owen comes down and tosses him back in the ring. Then as he's walking back up the aisle Bret scores the win, and Owen makes a bunch of pissed off faces. He thought he was throwing him back in so Prichard could finish him off...then THAT happens? Wasn't the plan. They tease a scrap there and then, but the refs keep them apart. Their match for 'Mania has been built up pretty well. They built to the Owen turn well, then the turn came off great, and Bret has been good as a guy that doesn't want to fight his little brother, but has resigned himself to the fact that it has to happen. Owen continually acting like a little shit is only making it easier to accept.
Randy Savage v Yokozuna (RAW, 2/28/94)
This started the show and it was GREAT. Savage is super fired up and you can just tell he's psyched to be wrestling on TV again. Vince seemed to have been trying to phase him out for about a year and a half at this point, but he still looks like one of the best wrestlers in the company. They should've put him in a programme with Bigelow and had them beat the shit out of each other for a million years. Yoko bumps and flings himself around like an absolute trooper here, taking a huge faceplant airball bump off a missed splash, hurling himself out to the floor, etc. Savage has to stick and move and flies around like a bearded pinball. Crowd is crazy hot for all of it as well. We get shenanigans at the finish with a salt bucket shot and run-ins, but Savage is amazing in the post-match trying to get at Crush, taking wild swings and spitting on him. There aren't many guys that sell "I want to tear your head from your shoulders" quite like Savage, and I'm definitely looking forward to seeing the Wrestlemania match. I fucking love Savage, Yoko was boss, and this was really good.
1994 WWF Project
Monday, 27 February 2012
1992 WCW -- That Well is STILL Not Dry
Brian Pillman v Jushin Liger (Superbrawl, 2/29/92)
I'd kind of been putting off re-watching this for a while. Last time I watched it I thought it was good, but I just had very little desire to sit and actually watch it again. It came off this time about as well as I thought the last time, but I'll probably go another 10 years before feeling the need to watch it again. They work even at the start and it's decent enough, then Liger takes over and starts working Pillman's leg. They do a nice struggle over the surfboard and Liger putting on the figure-four gets everybody wooing (although no "we want Flair" chant, unfortunately), and it's all solid stuff and does a fine job killing time...but then Pillman does...something, and it basically serves as the transition into the extended finishing run, and the five minutes of leg work ends up meaning jack shit. Pillman literally does not sell the leg for one second and renders the entire period before that meaningless. Finishing stretch is good and everything, but it's two great athletes doing whatever great athletes do, and I don't really, like, CARE, you know? The vampire in me would prefer it if they hated each other and headbutted each other until they were both bleeding buckets. But they respect each other and Pillman does a nice roll-up. Sure, this is good and all, but punch him in the FACE or something.
Brian Pillman v Shane Douglas (Saturday Night, 10/17/92)
THIS was more like it. This has no nice guy Pillman bullshit -- he is a smarmy little prick and acts like a smarmy little prick. They do some nice duelling armwork in the first half that's punctuated by Pillman acting like a smarmy little prick. Douglas is pretty vanilla, but I'm digging everything he's busting out when going after the arm. He does this hammerlock-into-headstand thing that looked way cool and nasty at the same time. Eventually Pillman takes over by tossing Shane out to the floor and giving him a baseball slide that broke his chin. Then he laughs because he is SMARMY and a prick. You know, as a guy that always used to think babyface Pillman was way better than heel Pillman, I'd probably rather watch heel Pillman at this stage. He's probably a better worker as a babyface, but I'd rather see him act like a shithead than respectable nice guy with high cheekbones. He still has the high cheekbones as a heel, but he's a PRICK about it so it's better. The psycho look he gets on his face as he's about to ram Douglas' head into the ring post was really the pro-wrestling perfection. Shane Douglas seems like a guy in quite the need of a reappraisal. Maybe.
WCW 1992 Project
I'd kind of been putting off re-watching this for a while. Last time I watched it I thought it was good, but I just had very little desire to sit and actually watch it again. It came off this time about as well as I thought the last time, but I'll probably go another 10 years before feeling the need to watch it again. They work even at the start and it's decent enough, then Liger takes over and starts working Pillman's leg. They do a nice struggle over the surfboard and Liger putting on the figure-four gets everybody wooing (although no "we want Flair" chant, unfortunately), and it's all solid stuff and does a fine job killing time...but then Pillman does...something, and it basically serves as the transition into the extended finishing run, and the five minutes of leg work ends up meaning jack shit. Pillman literally does not sell the leg for one second and renders the entire period before that meaningless. Finishing stretch is good and everything, but it's two great athletes doing whatever great athletes do, and I don't really, like, CARE, you know? The vampire in me would prefer it if they hated each other and headbutted each other until they were both bleeding buckets. But they respect each other and Pillman does a nice roll-up. Sure, this is good and all, but punch him in the FACE or something.
Brian Pillman v Shane Douglas (Saturday Night, 10/17/92)
THIS was more like it. This has no nice guy Pillman bullshit -- he is a smarmy little prick and acts like a smarmy little prick. They do some nice duelling armwork in the first half that's punctuated by Pillman acting like a smarmy little prick. Douglas is pretty vanilla, but I'm digging everything he's busting out when going after the arm. He does this hammerlock-into-headstand thing that looked way cool and nasty at the same time. Eventually Pillman takes over by tossing Shane out to the floor and giving him a baseball slide that broke his chin. Then he laughs because he is SMARMY and a prick. You know, as a guy that always used to think babyface Pillman was way better than heel Pillman, I'd probably rather watch heel Pillman at this stage. He's probably a better worker as a babyface, but I'd rather see him act like a shithead than respectable nice guy with high cheekbones. He still has the high cheekbones as a heel, but he's a PRICK about it so it's better. The psycho look he gets on his face as he's about to ram Douglas' head into the ring post was really the pro-wrestling perfection. Shane Douglas seems like a guy in quite the need of a reappraisal. Maybe.
WCW 1992 Project
Saturday, 25 February 2012
All Foreign Wars I do Proclaim Live on Blood & a Mother's Pain. I'd Rather Have my Son as He Used to be Than the King of Mid-South & His Whole Navy
Rock 'n' Roll Express v Midnight Express (1/21/85)
Fuck, the beatdown on Morton is amazing here. It's not quite as good as the absolute shellacking he takes in the RnR/Duggan v MX/Ladd six-man from Houston, but Eaton and Condrey really beat the shit out of him. In a lot of ways this kind of felt like a low-key version of this match-up. The crowd heat isn't as crazy as you're used to in a Midnights/RnR match; the opening stretch has little in the way of MX stooging; the RnRs only bust out one double team; Cornette barely gets involved at all, etc. Morton's heat segment is the best part of the match, but Condrey and Eaton (and Cornette) don't really whip the crowd into a frenzy by taking a ton of cheapshots and constantly cheating. They tone it down a bit, but in some ways they come off looking more vicious than usual. Some of the subtle little bits of nastiness are really awesome, like when Eaton has Morton in a headlock near the MX corner and Condrey just stomps right on Morton's ankle from the apron. I'm convinced Condrey is one of the all time great subtle nasty bastards in wrestling history. When he starts laying into guys with kneedrops right to the ribs, that's not subtle. It always looks brutal, but that's in-your-face brutality. He can do that and do it REAL well, but shit like stomping on a guy's ankle or driving his palm into a guy's throat behind the ref's back or digging his knee into someone's adam's apple, that's the kind of subtle brutality Condrey is a master of. I didn't think any of the MX/RnR matches on this set were blow away great or anything (unless you count the six-man tags), but this DID have an awesome heat segment. Condrey is SUCH a bad motherfucker.
Hacksaw Duggan & Terry Gordy v Ted DiBiase & Steve Williams (Texas Tornado Match) (1/21/85)
This was a fun chaotic brawl, but it never did a great deal for me when I first watched it and it didn't do a great deal for me this time. Gordy drags DiBiase over to the railing and says something to a group of kids, then he grabs DiBiase's head, the kids all kick the guardrail out and Gordy rams DiBiase's head into it. THAT is fan interaction! There's a great moment towards the end where Duggan just comes flying into camera shot and tries to kill DiBiase. The Duggan/Ted interactions in this weren't nearly as molten as they usually were, but that bit was awesome. Loaded glove finish with the twist was cool as well. Really, there isn't anything I can complain about here, but the Mid-South set is so completely STACKED with great shit that even the fun chaotic brawls get lost in the shuffle.
Mid-South Project
Fuck, the beatdown on Morton is amazing here. It's not quite as good as the absolute shellacking he takes in the RnR/Duggan v MX/Ladd six-man from Houston, but Eaton and Condrey really beat the shit out of him. In a lot of ways this kind of felt like a low-key version of this match-up. The crowd heat isn't as crazy as you're used to in a Midnights/RnR match; the opening stretch has little in the way of MX stooging; the RnRs only bust out one double team; Cornette barely gets involved at all, etc. Morton's heat segment is the best part of the match, but Condrey and Eaton (and Cornette) don't really whip the crowd into a frenzy by taking a ton of cheapshots and constantly cheating. They tone it down a bit, but in some ways they come off looking more vicious than usual. Some of the subtle little bits of nastiness are really awesome, like when Eaton has Morton in a headlock near the MX corner and Condrey just stomps right on Morton's ankle from the apron. I'm convinced Condrey is one of the all time great subtle nasty bastards in wrestling history. When he starts laying into guys with kneedrops right to the ribs, that's not subtle. It always looks brutal, but that's in-your-face brutality. He can do that and do it REAL well, but shit like stomping on a guy's ankle or driving his palm into a guy's throat behind the ref's back or digging his knee into someone's adam's apple, that's the kind of subtle brutality Condrey is a master of. I didn't think any of the MX/RnR matches on this set were blow away great or anything (unless you count the six-man tags), but this DID have an awesome heat segment. Condrey is SUCH a bad motherfucker.
Hacksaw Duggan & Terry Gordy v Ted DiBiase & Steve Williams (Texas Tornado Match) (1/21/85)
This was a fun chaotic brawl, but it never did a great deal for me when I first watched it and it didn't do a great deal for me this time. Gordy drags DiBiase over to the railing and says something to a group of kids, then he grabs DiBiase's head, the kids all kick the guardrail out and Gordy rams DiBiase's head into it. THAT is fan interaction! There's a great moment towards the end where Duggan just comes flying into camera shot and tries to kill DiBiase. The Duggan/Ted interactions in this weren't nearly as molten as they usually were, but that bit was awesome. Loaded glove finish with the twist was cool as well. Really, there isn't anything I can complain about here, but the Mid-South set is so completely STACKED with great shit that even the fun chaotic brawls get lost in the shuffle.
Mid-South Project
Friday, 24 February 2012
1992 WCW -- When I Thought the Well Was Dry...
Ricky Steamboat & Barry Windham v Greg Valentine & Dick Slater (Power Hour, 8/1/92)
Yeah, this was good. Slater looks like Jeff Jarrett circa 1996 only a little more bloated. I've never really "got it" with Slater. He's not bad or anything, but any time I see him I kind of feel like I'm watching someone playing Terry Funk. He does a decent enough Terry Funk impression, but I usually watch Slater and find myself wishing I was watching Funk instead. Slater has nice Funk-isms, but nobody has better Funk-isms than Funk. "You can buy that knock-off Rolex, but people will know. You'll fool nobody. Before long you'll wish you had the real thing. But you can't afford the real thing because you're bloated and you look like Jeff Jarrett." Valentine looks pretty much exactly the same as he did in '79. He takes his awesome bump where he stares off into space for a few seconds before falling flat on his face. Has the internet given that bump a name yet? Is it the Valentine Flop? "When a blond haired ruffian falls in the woods and nobody is there to hear it, does it make a sound?" Steamboat plays FIP here and you can imagine how that goes. Valentine and Slater clubber and Steamboat sells like he is who he is. I don't remember Greg throwing a ton of chops, but there was probably a Valentine/Steamboat chop exchange in there somewhere that ruled. I'm assuming this was supposed to be a six-man tag, because before the match Barbarian is out with Slater and Valentine but gets told to hit the bricks, turning it into a 2-on-2. Dustin would've been Steamboat and Barry's partner, but he's got a busted up knee and couldn't even make it out. Well eventually Barbarian comes out anyway and slams Steamboat on the floor, so Dustin hits the scene to even things up. When he gets in there he cleans house on one leg, throwing bionic elbows as Greg, Slater and Barb try to circle him like a pack of hyenas. When Valentine locks in the figure-four, Steamboat grabs the towel and his milking of throwing in the towel is classic dramatic Steamboat.
The Steiner Brothers v Terry Gordy & Steve Williams (Worldwide, 9/26/92)
I'm not sure how many matches these guys had together in '92, but this feels like the "weakest" of the three I've seen (Beach Blast and Clash XIX being the other two). Well, maybe not. The Clash match is definitely better, but this is sort of an abbreviated version of the 30 minute Beach Blast match. It takes a lot of the good from that (BEEF, clubbering, dudes getting tossed around) and, because it's only 12 minutes, eliminates some of the downtime. Rick Steiner throws a total bomb of a clothesline. He always does. When he hits it on beefier guys it sounds like someone took a baseball bat to a slab of meat. Scott plays FIP here and there's a spot where he tries to roll to his corner to make the tag, and Williams, who's on his knees, cuts him off by shoulder tackling him right in the jaw. I liked the finish to this, too. Rick gets the hot tag and things start to break down, but he still manages to pair off with the legal man (Gordy). Williams hits a bridging German suplex on Scott, but as he does that Rick hits one of his own on Gordy for the win. I had no recollection of the tag titles changing hands on TV, but it made for a pretty great moment.
Rick Rude v Erik Watts (Worldwide, 12/5/92)
Man, Rude's promo before the match is so great. He calls Bill Watts a piss ant and rips on his kid for being shitty. He's a boy in a man's world, and Rude is the manliest of them all. He even forgoes the "Shut you mouths while I take my robe off and show you all what a real SEXY MAN looks like" bit at the start and just calls Watts a lowlife punk kid instead. This is a total Rude show. Watts is completely fine and makes nice comebacks and sells well...you can't really ask for much more out of him in a situation like this. He does everything he needs to do and he does it well...but Rude just carries himself like such a fucking badass pro. He is a guy that gets paid to kick the shit out of people, and when he gets to kick the shit out of punk kids whose daddies are piss ants, he takes a certain degree of enjoyment in that. There's no posing and fuck around; this is business and the Watts family is on his shitlist. I've wrote in the past about how Rude really perfected that "hierarchy formula" in '92. This is another example of it. It's not as good as the Dustin and Pillman matches (the two matches I'd say highlight that formula best), but Rude's performance is about as strong in all three. He gave Dustin a good amount of their match because Dustin wasn't far off being his equal. Dustin came out of it looking great and there were points where you could believe he'd win. Pillman was a bit further down the card when they had their match, so he didn't give Pillman as much as he gave Dustin, but he gave him enough. Pillman came out of it looking great and there were points where you could believe he'd win. The gap between Rude's spot on the card and Watts' spot on the card is much bigger, so Rude hardly gives him anything. Watts comes out of it looking great just for hanging as long as he did, and there were STILL points where you could believe he'd win. It's a huge testament to Rude that he'd eat about 20 seconds of offence the whole match and still come across as someone that was in danger of being upset. And it's not like he destroyed his credibility in the process, either. I finally settled on Rude being the best in the world in '92 a while back. This just strengthens his case.
WCW 1992 Project
Yeah, this was good. Slater looks like Jeff Jarrett circa 1996 only a little more bloated. I've never really "got it" with Slater. He's not bad or anything, but any time I see him I kind of feel like I'm watching someone playing Terry Funk. He does a decent enough Terry Funk impression, but I usually watch Slater and find myself wishing I was watching Funk instead. Slater has nice Funk-isms, but nobody has better Funk-isms than Funk. "You can buy that knock-off Rolex, but people will know. You'll fool nobody. Before long you'll wish you had the real thing. But you can't afford the real thing because you're bloated and you look like Jeff Jarrett." Valentine looks pretty much exactly the same as he did in '79. He takes his awesome bump where he stares off into space for a few seconds before falling flat on his face. Has the internet given that bump a name yet? Is it the Valentine Flop? "When a blond haired ruffian falls in the woods and nobody is there to hear it, does it make a sound?" Steamboat plays FIP here and you can imagine how that goes. Valentine and Slater clubber and Steamboat sells like he is who he is. I don't remember Greg throwing a ton of chops, but there was probably a Valentine/Steamboat chop exchange in there somewhere that ruled. I'm assuming this was supposed to be a six-man tag, because before the match Barbarian is out with Slater and Valentine but gets told to hit the bricks, turning it into a 2-on-2. Dustin would've been Steamboat and Barry's partner, but he's got a busted up knee and couldn't even make it out. Well eventually Barbarian comes out anyway and slams Steamboat on the floor, so Dustin hits the scene to even things up. When he gets in there he cleans house on one leg, throwing bionic elbows as Greg, Slater and Barb try to circle him like a pack of hyenas. When Valentine locks in the figure-four, Steamboat grabs the towel and his milking of throwing in the towel is classic dramatic Steamboat.
The Steiner Brothers v Terry Gordy & Steve Williams (Worldwide, 9/26/92)
I'm not sure how many matches these guys had together in '92, but this feels like the "weakest" of the three I've seen (Beach Blast and Clash XIX being the other two). Well, maybe not. The Clash match is definitely better, but this is sort of an abbreviated version of the 30 minute Beach Blast match. It takes a lot of the good from that (BEEF, clubbering, dudes getting tossed around) and, because it's only 12 minutes, eliminates some of the downtime. Rick Steiner throws a total bomb of a clothesline. He always does. When he hits it on beefier guys it sounds like someone took a baseball bat to a slab of meat. Scott plays FIP here and there's a spot where he tries to roll to his corner to make the tag, and Williams, who's on his knees, cuts him off by shoulder tackling him right in the jaw. I liked the finish to this, too. Rick gets the hot tag and things start to break down, but he still manages to pair off with the legal man (Gordy). Williams hits a bridging German suplex on Scott, but as he does that Rick hits one of his own on Gordy for the win. I had no recollection of the tag titles changing hands on TV, but it made for a pretty great moment.
Rick Rude v Erik Watts (Worldwide, 12/5/92)
Man, Rude's promo before the match is so great. He calls Bill Watts a piss ant and rips on his kid for being shitty. He's a boy in a man's world, and Rude is the manliest of them all. He even forgoes the "Shut you mouths while I take my robe off and show you all what a real SEXY MAN looks like" bit at the start and just calls Watts a lowlife punk kid instead. This is a total Rude show. Watts is completely fine and makes nice comebacks and sells well...you can't really ask for much more out of him in a situation like this. He does everything he needs to do and he does it well...but Rude just carries himself like such a fucking badass pro. He is a guy that gets paid to kick the shit out of people, and when he gets to kick the shit out of punk kids whose daddies are piss ants, he takes a certain degree of enjoyment in that. There's no posing and fuck around; this is business and the Watts family is on his shitlist. I've wrote in the past about how Rude really perfected that "hierarchy formula" in '92. This is another example of it. It's not as good as the Dustin and Pillman matches (the two matches I'd say highlight that formula best), but Rude's performance is about as strong in all three. He gave Dustin a good amount of their match because Dustin wasn't far off being his equal. Dustin came out of it looking great and there were points where you could believe he'd win. Pillman was a bit further down the card when they had their match, so he didn't give Pillman as much as he gave Dustin, but he gave him enough. Pillman came out of it looking great and there were points where you could believe he'd win. The gap between Rude's spot on the card and Watts' spot on the card is much bigger, so Rude hardly gives him anything. Watts comes out of it looking great just for hanging as long as he did, and there were STILL points where you could believe he'd win. It's a huge testament to Rude that he'd eat about 20 seconds of offence the whole match and still come across as someone that was in danger of being upset. And it's not like he destroyed his credibility in the process, either. I finally settled on Rude being the best in the world in '92 a while back. This just strengthens his case.
WCW 1992 Project
Thursday, 23 February 2012
Oh, Marty. I Wish You Saved Yourself From Yourself
Marty Jannetty & 123 Kid v The Headshrinkers (Wrestlefest, 1/11/94)
Oh, fuck! Dream match! Waltman and Marty were two of the best guys in the company in '94, and the Headshrinkers might be the best tag team. This got ten minutes and totally ruled like I hoped it would. There are some GREAT kicks in this. Waltman throws a few roundhouse kicks that look like they'd just shatter your jaw, and both Samu and Fatu rattle Jannetty's brains with side kicks. Great spot where Jannetty rams Samu's head into the steps, but Samu just shakes it off (he's Samoan and has an indestructible head) and cracks him right under the chin. Kid and Marty try and work the arm and make quick tags so Fatu just punches Kid in the nose and flattens him with a fatboy powerslam. He looked disgusted that a 70 pound girl would even try that. Marty is a really good FIP, taking a sweet inside-out bump off a Fatu clothesline (which is a cool role reversal since Fatu always loved to take that bump when he'd get clotheslined) and sells the shit out of getting choked with the tag rope. He and Samu have a nice sequence early on where they do a criss-cross spot with Marty dropping down and catching Samu with a monkey flip. When they get back up they do it again, but this time Samu drops down and tries to monkey flip Marty, except Marty is hip to it and just punches him in the face instead. Apparently Samu getting hanged in the ropes is a signature spot of his, because he does it again here. Maybe I should feel guilty about loving that spot so much since it wound up mutilating Mick Foley and turning him into a hideously deformed freak, but I'll assume the ring ropes in the WWF were more forgiving than the ones in Germany that ripped Foley's ear off. So I will continue to love that spot. Headshrinkers should've been on every show WWF ran, every week of every month in 1994 (although I think they turn face soon...that's mildly disappointing).
Marty Jannetty v Johnny Polo (RAW, 1/31/94)
We were supposed to get Kid/Polo here, but Waltman picked up a knee injury and had to drop out of the rumble (for SPARKY PLUGG...did that have one or two 'G's? I forget), and he's still on crutches this week so we get no Kid/Polo match after all. Instead we get Jannetty/Polo while Kid joins McMahon and IRS at the announce table (this is when RAW had a different guy next to Vince on commentary every week. Irwin was fine when he wasn't making crappy tax cheat jokes. He's no Savage, however). I wish Jannetty managed to stay cohesive enough to have a really good run in the WWF, because he can still GO at this point. This was pretty good. I find myself coming around to Levy. ECW Raven does nothing for me, but after watching a bunch of WCW Raven recently and this WWF stuff where he acts like an obnoxious shithead, I get the sense I'd rather watch 1998 Raven or 1994 Johnny Polo than 2012 Naomuchi Marufuji or Fergal Devitt. He blows a backdrop pretty hilariously, but he redeems himself with a nasty crotching on the top rope, and the opening bit where Jannetty ties his feet together with the microphone chord ("I believe this is the first time on Monday Night RAW we've seen a microphone chord used in an offensive capacity" -- Vince, obviously) while he stumbles and stooges was a nice comedy spot. I don't think Jannetty lasts much longer before getting fired (again?), but I'm hoping he gets to wrestle someone like Owen or Bam Bam (or Bastion Booger or ADAM BOMB) before he goes, because that could be the shit.
Marty Jannetty v IRS (RAW, 2/7/94)
This was about as good as IRS/Savage, which I'm content with. Came about after Kid stole Irwin's briefcase the week before and Marty came to his little buddy's aid, and then there was some shit with Razor Ramon and his gold chains. This happened because of that. Marty controls early then Irwin throws him into the ring post and Marty takes an aaaaawesome bump. He goes head-first into it then flies in the air and spins around before coming back down and landing on his face. Looked like he came zooming out of a huge water slide and tried to hit the pool below as awkwardly as he could. Irwin is sweating PROFUSELY after about 45 seconds. He's like the guy at the wedding that spends the whole night dancing and by the end his shirt is completely drenched in sweat. If he's wearing a pale blue shit, by the end of the night it's turned navy. I can't imagine wrestling in a shirt and suspenders being all that comfortable. Actually, why does he never use his tie or suspenders to choke his opponents? It feels like every IRS match in existence has an extended headlock spot where he puts his feet on the ropes for leverage, but it'd be much more fun if he used his uncomfortable wrestling attire to his advantage. The Quebecers and Johnny Polo come out at some point (Quebecers come out twice -- first time they get sent back to the dressing room), then Razor comes out, and I was figuring this would set up a Razor/Jannetty v Quebecers match. Polo trips Marty as he's trying to slingshot himself from the apron into the ring (I'm assuming he was going for a slingshot clothesline or something), and Marty takes it by almost landing on the side of his neck. After the match Razor cleans house, and sure enough he and Marty challenge the Quebecers to a match. Later on in the show Vince tells us it's going to happen in two weeks time, but I'm not sure Marty lasts long enough to take part in it. If he does then I'm STOKED. If he doesn't then they should have the Headshrinkers kill jobbers.
1994 WWF Project
Oh, fuck! Dream match! Waltman and Marty were two of the best guys in the company in '94, and the Headshrinkers might be the best tag team. This got ten minutes and totally ruled like I hoped it would. There are some GREAT kicks in this. Waltman throws a few roundhouse kicks that look like they'd just shatter your jaw, and both Samu and Fatu rattle Jannetty's brains with side kicks. Great spot where Jannetty rams Samu's head into the steps, but Samu just shakes it off (he's Samoan and has an indestructible head) and cracks him right under the chin. Kid and Marty try and work the arm and make quick tags so Fatu just punches Kid in the nose and flattens him with a fatboy powerslam. He looked disgusted that a 70 pound girl would even try that. Marty is a really good FIP, taking a sweet inside-out bump off a Fatu clothesline (which is a cool role reversal since Fatu always loved to take that bump when he'd get clotheslined) and sells the shit out of getting choked with the tag rope. He and Samu have a nice sequence early on where they do a criss-cross spot with Marty dropping down and catching Samu with a monkey flip. When they get back up they do it again, but this time Samu drops down and tries to monkey flip Marty, except Marty is hip to it and just punches him in the face instead. Apparently Samu getting hanged in the ropes is a signature spot of his, because he does it again here. Maybe I should feel guilty about loving that spot so much since it wound up mutilating Mick Foley and turning him into a hideously deformed freak, but I'll assume the ring ropes in the WWF were more forgiving than the ones in Germany that ripped Foley's ear off. So I will continue to love that spot. Headshrinkers should've been on every show WWF ran, every week of every month in 1994 (although I think they turn face soon...that's mildly disappointing).
Marty Jannetty v Johnny Polo (RAW, 1/31/94)
We were supposed to get Kid/Polo here, but Waltman picked up a knee injury and had to drop out of the rumble (for SPARKY PLUGG...did that have one or two 'G's? I forget), and he's still on crutches this week so we get no Kid/Polo match after all. Instead we get Jannetty/Polo while Kid joins McMahon and IRS at the announce table (this is when RAW had a different guy next to Vince on commentary every week. Irwin was fine when he wasn't making crappy tax cheat jokes. He's no Savage, however). I wish Jannetty managed to stay cohesive enough to have a really good run in the WWF, because he can still GO at this point. This was pretty good. I find myself coming around to Levy. ECW Raven does nothing for me, but after watching a bunch of WCW Raven recently and this WWF stuff where he acts like an obnoxious shithead, I get the sense I'd rather watch 1998 Raven or 1994 Johnny Polo than 2012 Naomuchi Marufuji or Fergal Devitt. He blows a backdrop pretty hilariously, but he redeems himself with a nasty crotching on the top rope, and the opening bit where Jannetty ties his feet together with the microphone chord ("I believe this is the first time on Monday Night RAW we've seen a microphone chord used in an offensive capacity" -- Vince, obviously) while he stumbles and stooges was a nice comedy spot. I don't think Jannetty lasts much longer before getting fired (again?), but I'm hoping he gets to wrestle someone like Owen or Bam Bam (or Bastion Booger or ADAM BOMB) before he goes, because that could be the shit.
Marty Jannetty v IRS (RAW, 2/7/94)
This was about as good as IRS/Savage, which I'm content with. Came about after Kid stole Irwin's briefcase the week before and Marty came to his little buddy's aid, and then there was some shit with Razor Ramon and his gold chains. This happened because of that. Marty controls early then Irwin throws him into the ring post and Marty takes an aaaaawesome bump. He goes head-first into it then flies in the air and spins around before coming back down and landing on his face. Looked like he came zooming out of a huge water slide and tried to hit the pool below as awkwardly as he could. Irwin is sweating PROFUSELY after about 45 seconds. He's like the guy at the wedding that spends the whole night dancing and by the end his shirt is completely drenched in sweat. If he's wearing a pale blue shit, by the end of the night it's turned navy. I can't imagine wrestling in a shirt and suspenders being all that comfortable. Actually, why does he never use his tie or suspenders to choke his opponents? It feels like every IRS match in existence has an extended headlock spot where he puts his feet on the ropes for leverage, but it'd be much more fun if he used his uncomfortable wrestling attire to his advantage. The Quebecers and Johnny Polo come out at some point (Quebecers come out twice -- first time they get sent back to the dressing room), then Razor comes out, and I was figuring this would set up a Razor/Jannetty v Quebecers match. Polo trips Marty as he's trying to slingshot himself from the apron into the ring (I'm assuming he was going for a slingshot clothesline or something), and Marty takes it by almost landing on the side of his neck. After the match Razor cleans house, and sure enough he and Marty challenge the Quebecers to a match. Later on in the show Vince tells us it's going to happen in two weeks time, but I'm not sure Marty lasts long enough to take part in it. If he does then I'm STOKED. If he doesn't then they should have the Headshrinkers kill jobbers.
1994 WWF Project
Wednesday, 22 February 2012
Negro Casas v Blue Panther (CMLL, 4/24/11)
This was tremendous. I have no idea how Negro Casas does it. He's a 52 year old man and looks as good as he did 20 years ago. I mean, there's plenty of guys in lucha that reach their 50s and are still awesome. Shit, half of them don't even hit their prime until they're 45. But Casas is more or less the exact same as he was when he was in his 30s. Black Terry, Negro Navarro, Negro Casas, Blue Panther...those guys are still some of the best wrestlers in the entire world. Christ, Terry will be SIXTY this year. Terry and Navarro and Panther have a maestro/vet aura about them. I guess Casas does as well, but he doesn't LOOK old. He doesn't move around like a guy in his 50s that's been wrestling for 30+ years. If someone were to watch this without actually knowing he was 52, they'd think this was a lucha vet wrestling a guy 20 years his junior. Still, this being as good as it was had as much to do with Panther as it did Casas. The first fall is short, but the brawling segment with Casas dishing out punishment was really awesome shit. He jumps Panther in the aisle and just beats on him, choking him with his jacket, headbutting him right in the nose, ramming his head into the fixed seats, etc. Casas is cocky as all get out, but Panther manages to catch him with a flash Fujiwara armbar for the first fall, and they do a great job making the arm a focus for the rest of the match. Panther is such a nasty bastard going after it. He folds it up in a chair and starts kicking at it so hard you could imagine Casas' shoulder getting torn to pieces, and there's a few moments where he'll hammerlock the arm and start biting Casas' fingers. At the end of the second fall Casas dropkicks Panther in the knee (and then takes the fall), and by the end of the match Panther is hobbling around like his leg is completely useless. Third fall is loaded with great moments, but the spot that really cements this as a work of fucking ART is Casas breaking the Nudo Lagunero by SPITTING right in Panther's eyes. Just an incredible desperation spot. Finish pays off all the arm work and is about as great a "flash finish" as the first fall's was. I'm not sure if I'd call this the best match of 2011, but these guys have a fucking hair match coming up in about a week and I will be counting the minutes until that shit shows up.
Tuesday, 21 February 2012
DVDVR Memphis Set, Top 60; #48
The Fabulous Ones v The Sheepherders (6/22/85)
So this set was amazing for a number of reasons. There's the obvious ones like the abundance of great matches, interviews and angles. It's what really cemented guys like Lawler and Dundee as two of the best wrestlers of all time. It got people to watch a bunch of Dutch Mantell and see how great HE was. It showed how awesome Lance Russell was, and I'd assume that 99% of the people who watched the set would consider him one of the best commentators/announcers ever. This set made it pretty clear that Jimmy Hart is one of the all-time great managers. You got to see Randy Savage act like a complete fucking lunatic and it only strengthened HIS case as one of the best ever. Koko Ware showed up and totally ruled it. Really, for a promotion/territory that had a rep for being an "angles territory" with not much in the way of "great work" or whatever...this set really blew that myth clean out the water.
Then The Fabs. I never saw any of the Fabs stuff on the Mid-South set until later (I never picked that up until after I had finished the Memphis set), so going into Memphis I was pretty much completely in the dark when it came to those guys as a team. I'd probably say I was already a Stan Lane fan from his MX stint, but I only really knew Keirn as Skinner in the WWF and that match against Sting in WCW that was really good. By the end of the set they'd become one of my favourite tag teams of all time (then they acted like total assholes when I watched the Mid-South set and that made me love them even more).
Honestly, this isn't the kind of thing I'd show someone that had never seen the Fabs before if I was trying to make a case for them as a great team. If I wanted to highlight babyface Fabs I'd go with the matches against the Moondogs or Pretty Young Things (which serves as a double showcase -- the Fabs and Koko Ware). If I wanted to highlight heel Fabs I'd go with the Guerreros matches from Mid-South (which also serves as a double showcase -- the Fabs and the Guerreros).
This has Keirn getting his ass stomped and hitting a huge gusher, but the Moondogs matches have Keirn AND Lane getting their asses stomped and hitting huge gushers (unless my memory has fucked me again). PLUS they dish out ass stompings of their own and everybody bleeds and FUCK those Moondogs matches were awesome and I can't wait to watch them again.
This is worked in the studio and doesn't really allow them to go totally nuts and brawl and assault each other all over the place like an arena setting would.
Lane and Keirn come out before the match and talk about how they'll defend their tag straps any time, any place. Boyd and Morgan want a title shot, so they'll give them a title shot right this minute. I don't remember what set this whole thing off, but I'm assuming it has something to do with Boyd and Morgan ripping on the USA because Lane is all "You can go back to your own country, you know," although he's not as full on in-your-face about it as a Hulk Hogan or a Hacksaw Duggan. It was more understated. "You come over here and drive American cars and sleep in American hotels, and then every night you try and score with American women" as opposed to "This is AMERICA, God dammit. If you don't like it you can GIIIIIT OUT." Lane is puffy as Hell here, btw. Looks like he has mumps.
Match itself gets a decent amount of time to build. Keirn is really the workhorse for his team here. Lane probably does some stuff early on, but I'm not exactly remembering any of it. Boyd and Morgan aren't my favourite version of Sheepherders, but Boyd will stab you in the head with a flagpole and bite you in the forehead which is all good with me. Morgan is fine enough, but this is really all about what Jonathan Boyd and Steve Keirn are bringing from their respective teams. Boyd coming in to sneak a cheapshot and Keirn just scooting out of the ring because he has no intentions of being caught between two Sheepherders is the kind of cool little touches they bring to this.
Eventually Keirn gets jabbed with a flagpole and starts bleeding. Boyd and Morgan work him over well enough, but I'm not really FELLING it, you know? Keirn had some great "blood loss" selling and took a good pasting, and the Sheepherders worked some nice distraction/choking spots, but it's all kind of a five out of ten on the 'Midnight Express Gang Rapes Ricky Morton Scale'.
Finish is sort of a double-edged sword. On the one hand, someone putting a cue ball in a sock (I'm not sure if it was a cue ball, but it was something in a sock, and cue ball + sock is a match made in heaven so we'll just assume that's what it was), swinging it around in a circle and blasting it off another person's ear is a heck of a way to end a match. On the other hand, you never get that hot tag to really blow the lid off the place. Well, you do, but the ref' misses it and tosses Lane back out. Actually the more I think about it the more I don't really mind it. The replay of Keirn reaching out to make the tag before being dropped like a sack of potatoes makes for a pretty great visual.
Post-match the Sheepherders are stripped of their newly won belts because of the way they won them, but then some lawyer dude that I don't remember ever seeing before (I'm assuming he floated around the territory for a little while) comes out and tells them he'll take the promoters to court over this travesty -- the referee's word is final and his final word was that the Sheepherders won the tag titles. I think Marlin just gave up in the end and handed them the titles. He must not have wanted the messy legal battle.
Not really a great match, and I'd be surprised if I didn't think there were fifty matches better than it by the time I get through the rest of this stuff (2015, probably), but if nothing else it's got me looking forward to the cage match that I had a few spots higher than it.
So this set was amazing for a number of reasons. There's the obvious ones like the abundance of great matches, interviews and angles. It's what really cemented guys like Lawler and Dundee as two of the best wrestlers of all time. It got people to watch a bunch of Dutch Mantell and see how great HE was. It showed how awesome Lance Russell was, and I'd assume that 99% of the people who watched the set would consider him one of the best commentators/announcers ever. This set made it pretty clear that Jimmy Hart is one of the all-time great managers. You got to see Randy Savage act like a complete fucking lunatic and it only strengthened HIS case as one of the best ever. Koko Ware showed up and totally ruled it. Really, for a promotion/territory that had a rep for being an "angles territory" with not much in the way of "great work" or whatever...this set really blew that myth clean out the water.
Then The Fabs. I never saw any of the Fabs stuff on the Mid-South set until later (I never picked that up until after I had finished the Memphis set), so going into Memphis I was pretty much completely in the dark when it came to those guys as a team. I'd probably say I was already a Stan Lane fan from his MX stint, but I only really knew Keirn as Skinner in the WWF and that match against Sting in WCW that was really good. By the end of the set they'd become one of my favourite tag teams of all time (then they acted like total assholes when I watched the Mid-South set and that made me love them even more).
Honestly, this isn't the kind of thing I'd show someone that had never seen the Fabs before if I was trying to make a case for them as a great team. If I wanted to highlight babyface Fabs I'd go with the matches against the Moondogs or Pretty Young Things (which serves as a double showcase -- the Fabs and Koko Ware). If I wanted to highlight heel Fabs I'd go with the Guerreros matches from Mid-South (which also serves as a double showcase -- the Fabs and the Guerreros).
This has Keirn getting his ass stomped and hitting a huge gusher, but the Moondogs matches have Keirn AND Lane getting their asses stomped and hitting huge gushers (unless my memory has fucked me again). PLUS they dish out ass stompings of their own and everybody bleeds and FUCK those Moondogs matches were awesome and I can't wait to watch them again.
This is worked in the studio and doesn't really allow them to go totally nuts and brawl and assault each other all over the place like an arena setting would.
Lane and Keirn come out before the match and talk about how they'll defend their tag straps any time, any place. Boyd and Morgan want a title shot, so they'll give them a title shot right this minute. I don't remember what set this whole thing off, but I'm assuming it has something to do with Boyd and Morgan ripping on the USA because Lane is all "You can go back to your own country, you know," although he's not as full on in-your-face about it as a Hulk Hogan or a Hacksaw Duggan. It was more understated. "You come over here and drive American cars and sleep in American hotels, and then every night you try and score with American women" as opposed to "This is AMERICA, God dammit. If you don't like it you can GIIIIIT OUT." Lane is puffy as Hell here, btw. Looks like he has mumps.
Match itself gets a decent amount of time to build. Keirn is really the workhorse for his team here. Lane probably does some stuff early on, but I'm not exactly remembering any of it. Boyd and Morgan aren't my favourite version of Sheepherders, but Boyd will stab you in the head with a flagpole and bite you in the forehead which is all good with me. Morgan is fine enough, but this is really all about what Jonathan Boyd and Steve Keirn are bringing from their respective teams. Boyd coming in to sneak a cheapshot and Keirn just scooting out of the ring because he has no intentions of being caught between two Sheepherders is the kind of cool little touches they bring to this.
Eventually Keirn gets jabbed with a flagpole and starts bleeding. Boyd and Morgan work him over well enough, but I'm not really FELLING it, you know? Keirn had some great "blood loss" selling and took a good pasting, and the Sheepherders worked some nice distraction/choking spots, but it's all kind of a five out of ten on the 'Midnight Express Gang Rapes Ricky Morton Scale'.
Finish is sort of a double-edged sword. On the one hand, someone putting a cue ball in a sock (I'm not sure if it was a cue ball, but it was something in a sock, and cue ball + sock is a match made in heaven so we'll just assume that's what it was), swinging it around in a circle and blasting it off another person's ear is a heck of a way to end a match. On the other hand, you never get that hot tag to really blow the lid off the place. Well, you do, but the ref' misses it and tosses Lane back out. Actually the more I think about it the more I don't really mind it. The replay of Keirn reaching out to make the tag before being dropped like a sack of potatoes makes for a pretty great visual.
Post-match the Sheepherders are stripped of their newly won belts because of the way they won them, but then some lawyer dude that I don't remember ever seeing before (I'm assuming he floated around the territory for a little while) comes out and tells them he'll take the promoters to court over this travesty -- the referee's word is final and his final word was that the Sheepherders won the tag titles. I think Marlin just gave up in the end and handed them the titles. He must not have wanted the messy legal battle.
Not really a great match, and I'd be surprised if I didn't think there were fifty matches better than it by the time I get through the rest of this stuff (2015, probably), but if nothing else it's got me looking forward to the cage match that I had a few spots higher than it.
Monday, 20 February 2012
Royal Rumble 1994
Well this was a pretty fucking good show. I actually sat and watched the entire thing in one sitting last night. One sitting. I NEVER do that anymore. Tenryu being in the main event was a decent motivator, but everything else was at least solid.
Bam Bam Bigelow v Tatanka
I remember this mostly for Bam Bam stopping Tatanka's war dance/Hulk-Up by blasting him in the back of the head with an enziguri and then mockingly doing a war dance of his own while the crowd boo him really loudly. On top of that one spot I remembered the actual match being good, and for once my memory held up, because this was indeed a good match. Bam Bam strikes me as clearly being one of the best guys in the company at this point. He takes a HUGE DDT bump here, has some great cut-offs, and generally comes across as a guy you don't want to fuck with. Plus his head is covered in tattoos. His enziguri looks real nasty, but there's another spot where they're both standing and he jumps up and squashes Tatanka's head between his ankles. Imagine a pair of giant hedge clippers closing on a rose bush. Finish is good too, with Bigelow crashing and burning on a missed moonsault and Tatanka following it up with a cross body off the top. Fine way to start a PPV.
The Quebecers v Bret & Owen Hart (WWF Tag Team Titles Match)
I'm assuming most people remember this for the Owen turn and subsequent "That's why I kicked your leg out of your leg" promo (I know I did), in which case everything leading up to that has been lost in the shuffle, because this was a really fucking good match. Bret and Owen controlling things at the start is good, then Bret plays face in peril and that's good, then Owen comes in and throws the Quebecers around and THAT'S good. Owen has an awesome belly-to-belly, and as soon as he got the hot tag and started whipping the Quebecers into the ropes I was hoping he'd belly-to-belly suplex someone...and sure enough he did. Then we hit the part most people probably remember (other than the post-match), with Bret taking a spill out to the floor (because Polo held the ropes open as he was running off) and coming up clutching his knee. Bret is really awesome at selling the leg from this point on (not just in this match, but in the rumble match later). The only thing he manages to put together offensively the rest of the match is a half-assed sharpshooter that lasts about 3 seconds before he crumbles in a heap again. Other than that he just sells the crap out of the injury the whole time. There's a great segment on the floor where the Quebecers mug him and Owen keeps trying to come around and protect his brother. Jacques nails him in the knee with a chair, Pierre jumps off the steps and lands with his entire body weight on the leg, and Jacques sneaks all the way around the ring while everybody else has congregated at the other side so he can whack Bret in the knee with Polo's putter. Eventually the ref' throws the match out because Bret is borderline-crippled, and that's what sets Owen off. You can sort of see where he's coming from with this. He's RIGHT THERE for the tag, but Bret has other ideas even though he can barely stand up. Little brother is ready and waiting, but big brother tries to go it alone. All you had to do was tag, Bret. All you had to do was tag. I might've kicked his leg out of his leg, too.
Razor Ramon v IRS (WWF Intercontinental Title Match)
This was decent enough; certainly better than their King of the Ring match later in the year. This at least has a clear layout/direction, whereas the KoR match just kind of plodded along with stuff happening and then ended. Razor takes his cool over the top rope bump here and Irwin does the same spot he did against Savage where he comes off the middle rope, catches Razor's leg, tosses it aside and hits a regular elbow drop. Schmozz finish has Michaels run down and hit Razor with the "fake" IC belt, then Irwin pins him and wins, but then some other shit happens with a ref' bumped ref' and another ref' and Razor winds up winning in the end. This still has nothing on the finish to the next match.
Yokozuna v The Undertaker (Casket Match, WWF Title)
Man, the Undertaker promos leading up to this were great, all dark and ominous with Paul Bearer being awesome. Calaway (and Pringle) really nailed that shit. This starts out pretty well, with Undertaker being indestructible and Yoko bumping around and being all bug-eyed. He rams Undertaker's head into the steps, but Undertaker just whips his head back and Yoko sees the whites of his eyes and shits himself. Actually, everything leading up to the million run-ins was good. Not a spectacular brawl or anything, but I dig watching both of these guys do their thing. THEN we get the million run-ins. Tenryu and Kabuki run in and Tenryu throws chops at a zombie. I don't remember Kabuki throwing his awesome uppercuts, but one out of two ain't bad. Bigelow hits the scene at some point and he even looks great standing around directing traffic, getting hit with a salt bucket, not making it look blatantly obvious he's just WAITING there to be punched while the Undertaker fights off 60 people. Fatu completely crushes Undertaker with a splash off the top. I mean, God damn he has an amazing top rope splash. Once they finally stuff him in the casket (after the power of the urn has escaped or...some shit), they're wheeling him up the ramp when the lights go out. Undertaker talks about how he won't rest in peace (cuttin' a promo inside the casket) and then he ascends to the heavens. Where did he go? Nobody knows. It took Leslie Nielson 8 months to find him.
Royal Rumble Match
Not really one of the better rumbles, but it had its highlights. The stuff with Diesel worked really well and even got him a standing ovation and a Diesel chant when he eventually got eliminated. Michaels was really good here too. He's a guy that will hurl himself around endlessly in these matches and he's always a part of a few great near-eliminations. His elimination was probably the best of the whole match, just getting launched out right over the ring post and taking a really nasty looking spill. Bret is still selling his leg like a trooper, and by the end you get the sense the crowd are ready to take to him as the guy running with the ball. When they did the co-winner bit the reactions to him were far more favourable than they were to Luger. Plus him just being in there meant there was always something for someone to focus on. There'll be moments where you don't have anyone to pair off with, so just head over and start stomping on Bret Hart's knee. He won't mind; that's what he's there for. Samu takes an absolutely horrendous "bump" into the ropes early on that I'm sure he would've thought twice about if he knew it'd tear Mick Foley's ear off a few months down the line. He tries to clothesline both Steiner brothers and ends up hanging himself in the ropes, but the way he totally HURLS himself into it looked like it could've yolked his head clean off his shoulders. Just crazy. Still, Tenryu was probably my favourite guy in this. He wasn't necessarily the "best" guy in it, but the second he got in there my attention was focused completely on him for practically the entire remainder. He knows nobody at this party, but his girlfriend dragged him along and now she's disappeared somewhere and he's left to mingle with people he's never met. He's not much of a socialite and doesn't really fit in at these shindigs. His brand of humour might seem strange to these people. There are times where he walks around the ring with nobody to play with, and he's not exactly eager enough to initiate conversation himself, but whenever somebody ELSE does...like Greg Valentine. You'd think those two would get along swimmingly. Two of the stiffest bastards in wrestling history. Guess what they do? They chop each other really hard and at one point Valentine just fucking clubs Tenryu right in the face. I'd say that qualifies as swimmingly. Tenryu's coming in to this as one of Mr. Fuji's hired guns that was sent to take out Lex Luger, so naturally you get plenty of Tenryu/Luger interaction. Luger has wrestled Ric Flair several thousand times at this point in his career, so he's a guy that is used to having his chest lit up. Sure enough he lets Tenryu light him up good and often. Bob Holly is in this as a replacement for the 123 Kid. That bums me out because Waltman has looked awesome in all the '94 stuff so far, and Holly isn't...all that good. Tenryu chops him REAL hard and I'm wondering if this is what made him think it'd be fun to stiff the bejeezus out of rookies. Other than Valentine and Luger, Marty Jannetty was probably the most willing to mix it up with Tenryu, which was surprising but awesome. When he eventually gets eliminated he tries to scoot back in because he's Tenryu and belligerent as all Hell. I'm hoping there's a Tenryu/Valentine singles match out there somewhere.
1994 WWF Project
Bam Bam Bigelow v Tatanka
I remember this mostly for Bam Bam stopping Tatanka's war dance/Hulk-Up by blasting him in the back of the head with an enziguri and then mockingly doing a war dance of his own while the crowd boo him really loudly. On top of that one spot I remembered the actual match being good, and for once my memory held up, because this was indeed a good match. Bam Bam strikes me as clearly being one of the best guys in the company at this point. He takes a HUGE DDT bump here, has some great cut-offs, and generally comes across as a guy you don't want to fuck with. Plus his head is covered in tattoos. His enziguri looks real nasty, but there's another spot where they're both standing and he jumps up and squashes Tatanka's head between his ankles. Imagine a pair of giant hedge clippers closing on a rose bush. Finish is good too, with Bigelow crashing and burning on a missed moonsault and Tatanka following it up with a cross body off the top. Fine way to start a PPV.
The Quebecers v Bret & Owen Hart (WWF Tag Team Titles Match)
I'm assuming most people remember this for the Owen turn and subsequent "That's why I kicked your leg out of your leg" promo (I know I did), in which case everything leading up to that has been lost in the shuffle, because this was a really fucking good match. Bret and Owen controlling things at the start is good, then Bret plays face in peril and that's good, then Owen comes in and throws the Quebecers around and THAT'S good. Owen has an awesome belly-to-belly, and as soon as he got the hot tag and started whipping the Quebecers into the ropes I was hoping he'd belly-to-belly suplex someone...and sure enough he did. Then we hit the part most people probably remember (other than the post-match), with Bret taking a spill out to the floor (because Polo held the ropes open as he was running off) and coming up clutching his knee. Bret is really awesome at selling the leg from this point on (not just in this match, but in the rumble match later). The only thing he manages to put together offensively the rest of the match is a half-assed sharpshooter that lasts about 3 seconds before he crumbles in a heap again. Other than that he just sells the crap out of the injury the whole time. There's a great segment on the floor where the Quebecers mug him and Owen keeps trying to come around and protect his brother. Jacques nails him in the knee with a chair, Pierre jumps off the steps and lands with his entire body weight on the leg, and Jacques sneaks all the way around the ring while everybody else has congregated at the other side so he can whack Bret in the knee with Polo's putter. Eventually the ref' throws the match out because Bret is borderline-crippled, and that's what sets Owen off. You can sort of see where he's coming from with this. He's RIGHT THERE for the tag, but Bret has other ideas even though he can barely stand up. Little brother is ready and waiting, but big brother tries to go it alone. All you had to do was tag, Bret. All you had to do was tag. I might've kicked his leg out of his leg, too.
Razor Ramon v IRS (WWF Intercontinental Title Match)
This was decent enough; certainly better than their King of the Ring match later in the year. This at least has a clear layout/direction, whereas the KoR match just kind of plodded along with stuff happening and then ended. Razor takes his cool over the top rope bump here and Irwin does the same spot he did against Savage where he comes off the middle rope, catches Razor's leg, tosses it aside and hits a regular elbow drop. Schmozz finish has Michaels run down and hit Razor with the "fake" IC belt, then Irwin pins him and wins, but then some other shit happens with a ref' bumped ref' and another ref' and Razor winds up winning in the end. This still has nothing on the finish to the next match.
Yokozuna v The Undertaker (Casket Match, WWF Title)
Man, the Undertaker promos leading up to this were great, all dark and ominous with Paul Bearer being awesome. Calaway (and Pringle) really nailed that shit. This starts out pretty well, with Undertaker being indestructible and Yoko bumping around and being all bug-eyed. He rams Undertaker's head into the steps, but Undertaker just whips his head back and Yoko sees the whites of his eyes and shits himself. Actually, everything leading up to the million run-ins was good. Not a spectacular brawl or anything, but I dig watching both of these guys do their thing. THEN we get the million run-ins. Tenryu and Kabuki run in and Tenryu throws chops at a zombie. I don't remember Kabuki throwing his awesome uppercuts, but one out of two ain't bad. Bigelow hits the scene at some point and he even looks great standing around directing traffic, getting hit with a salt bucket, not making it look blatantly obvious he's just WAITING there to be punched while the Undertaker fights off 60 people. Fatu completely crushes Undertaker with a splash off the top. I mean, God damn he has an amazing top rope splash. Once they finally stuff him in the casket (after the power of the urn has escaped or...some shit), they're wheeling him up the ramp when the lights go out. Undertaker talks about how he won't rest in peace (cuttin' a promo inside the casket) and then he ascends to the heavens. Where did he go? Nobody knows. It took Leslie Nielson 8 months to find him.
Royal Rumble Match
Not really one of the better rumbles, but it had its highlights. The stuff with Diesel worked really well and even got him a standing ovation and a Diesel chant when he eventually got eliminated. Michaels was really good here too. He's a guy that will hurl himself around endlessly in these matches and he's always a part of a few great near-eliminations. His elimination was probably the best of the whole match, just getting launched out right over the ring post and taking a really nasty looking spill. Bret is still selling his leg like a trooper, and by the end you get the sense the crowd are ready to take to him as the guy running with the ball. When they did the co-winner bit the reactions to him were far more favourable than they were to Luger. Plus him just being in there meant there was always something for someone to focus on. There'll be moments where you don't have anyone to pair off with, so just head over and start stomping on Bret Hart's knee. He won't mind; that's what he's there for. Samu takes an absolutely horrendous "bump" into the ropes early on that I'm sure he would've thought twice about if he knew it'd tear Mick Foley's ear off a few months down the line. He tries to clothesline both Steiner brothers and ends up hanging himself in the ropes, but the way he totally HURLS himself into it looked like it could've yolked his head clean off his shoulders. Just crazy. Still, Tenryu was probably my favourite guy in this. He wasn't necessarily the "best" guy in it, but the second he got in there my attention was focused completely on him for practically the entire remainder. He knows nobody at this party, but his girlfriend dragged him along and now she's disappeared somewhere and he's left to mingle with people he's never met. He's not much of a socialite and doesn't really fit in at these shindigs. His brand of humour might seem strange to these people. There are times where he walks around the ring with nobody to play with, and he's not exactly eager enough to initiate conversation himself, but whenever somebody ELSE does...like Greg Valentine. You'd think those two would get along swimmingly. Two of the stiffest bastards in wrestling history. Guess what they do? They chop each other really hard and at one point Valentine just fucking clubs Tenryu right in the face. I'd say that qualifies as swimmingly. Tenryu's coming in to this as one of Mr. Fuji's hired guns that was sent to take out Lex Luger, so naturally you get plenty of Tenryu/Luger interaction. Luger has wrestled Ric Flair several thousand times at this point in his career, so he's a guy that is used to having his chest lit up. Sure enough he lets Tenryu light him up good and often. Bob Holly is in this as a replacement for the 123 Kid. That bums me out because Waltman has looked awesome in all the '94 stuff so far, and Holly isn't...all that good. Tenryu chops him REAL hard and I'm wondering if this is what made him think it'd be fun to stiff the bejeezus out of rookies. Other than Valentine and Luger, Marty Jannetty was probably the most willing to mix it up with Tenryu, which was surprising but awesome. When he eventually gets eliminated he tries to scoot back in because he's Tenryu and belligerent as all Hell. I'm hoping there's a Tenryu/Valentine singles match out there somewhere.
1994 WWF Project
Sunday, 19 February 2012
Headshrinkers, Beef & BEEF
Randy Savage v IRS (RAW, 1/17/94)
This was the main event of the show leading into the Royal Rumble, and it was pretty good. Gets about 12 minutes. Savage is all hyper and shit before the match starts because Crush is on commentary, so when Irwin is getting in the ring Savage just pounces on him and we're off to the races. Savage's sell of getting his head smashed into the steps was great. He takes the initial shot and then kind of takes a bump where he deliberately falls onto the stairs and tumbles down them (all two steps) really loudly. Irwin looked way better here than he did in the King of the Ring matches I watched forever ago. Savage being Savage definitely helps make a control segment compelling, but Irwin was bringing it on his end as well. Cool spot where Savage is down and lifts the foot up as Irwin is coming off the middle rope, but Irwin clocks it before going face first into it, instead landing on his feet, throwing Savage's leg out the way and hitting a regular elbow. Crush gets involved at the end to the surprise of nobody and the match gets tossed, but it leads to a bunch of guys - including Luger, Bret and Yoko - hitting the scene for good old Rumble warm-up.
The Headshrinkers v Men on a Mission (RAW, 1/24/94)
We were supposed to get the Headshrinkers v Bret and Owen Hart here, which probably would've ruled it, but Owen kicked Bret's leg out of his leg at the Rumble so Men on a Mission sub in for them. There's like 4 Samoan Heads Are Made of Granite spots and the Headshrinkers throw a bunch of superkicks. Like, 12 or something. Mo plays FIP and he's not terrible. I don't remember a thing about the guy as a worker, and "not terrible" is generally enough to keep me relatively happy these days, so I was pleasantly surprised and give thumbs up all around. Mabel is a guy I remember having a somewhat okay spinning/rolling wheel kick, but he hits one on Samu here that was kind of crummy. Although he's gigantic so you can still buy a dude that size causing some damage with a fucking wheel kick. Samu lobs a GIANT gob of spit in the air upon contact. Fatu's splash off the top is such an awesome looking spot. Beefy guys splashing people from the top rope should look devastating (and, to be fair, most beefy guys who've ever done that spot HAVE made it look devastating), and Fatu's looks like it'd just crush your insides. JR dropping an internal bleeding line would've pushed this into 6 star territory. But he didn't so fuck him.
Yokozuna & Crush v Typhoon & Mabel (Wrestling Challenge, 7/31/94)
Came across this on DVDVR and thought it sounded interesting. "Interesting" is about as far as it got, although I dug it for what it was (7 minutes of three superbeefs and a big hoss clubbering and so forth). Typhoon and Yoko do a great shoulderblock spot early where Yoko does his awesome teeter-totter sell after two big BEEFY shoulderblocks before eventually going down on the third. Then he gets up and takes a swing at nothing before falling on his rump. Crush and Yoko take over when Crush hits a side kick on Mabel. Looks like he's trying to hit him in the head, but he's standing too close when he throws it and his foot gets swallowed up by Mabel's gut. It tickles me to hear Stan Lane commentate on "expert martial arts" that look even worse than his. Crush's kick to the back of Typhoon's head that sends him reeling into a big belly-to-belly from Yoko is a nice finish, but I'm watching this with the memory of Chris Adams obliterating Kevin Von Erich with a superkick to the back of his head fresh in my mind, so some piddly Crush version seems less impressive.
1994 WWF Project
This was the main event of the show leading into the Royal Rumble, and it was pretty good. Gets about 12 minutes. Savage is all hyper and shit before the match starts because Crush is on commentary, so when Irwin is getting in the ring Savage just pounces on him and we're off to the races. Savage's sell of getting his head smashed into the steps was great. He takes the initial shot and then kind of takes a bump where he deliberately falls onto the stairs and tumbles down them (all two steps) really loudly. Irwin looked way better here than he did in the King of the Ring matches I watched forever ago. Savage being Savage definitely helps make a control segment compelling, but Irwin was bringing it on his end as well. Cool spot where Savage is down and lifts the foot up as Irwin is coming off the middle rope, but Irwin clocks it before going face first into it, instead landing on his feet, throwing Savage's leg out the way and hitting a regular elbow. Crush gets involved at the end to the surprise of nobody and the match gets tossed, but it leads to a bunch of guys - including Luger, Bret and Yoko - hitting the scene for good old Rumble warm-up.
The Headshrinkers v Men on a Mission (RAW, 1/24/94)
We were supposed to get the Headshrinkers v Bret and Owen Hart here, which probably would've ruled it, but Owen kicked Bret's leg out of his leg at the Rumble so Men on a Mission sub in for them. There's like 4 Samoan Heads Are Made of Granite spots and the Headshrinkers throw a bunch of superkicks. Like, 12 or something. Mo plays FIP and he's not terrible. I don't remember a thing about the guy as a worker, and "not terrible" is generally enough to keep me relatively happy these days, so I was pleasantly surprised and give thumbs up all around. Mabel is a guy I remember having a somewhat okay spinning/rolling wheel kick, but he hits one on Samu here that was kind of crummy. Although he's gigantic so you can still buy a dude that size causing some damage with a fucking wheel kick. Samu lobs a GIANT gob of spit in the air upon contact. Fatu's splash off the top is such an awesome looking spot. Beefy guys splashing people from the top rope should look devastating (and, to be fair, most beefy guys who've ever done that spot HAVE made it look devastating), and Fatu's looks like it'd just crush your insides. JR dropping an internal bleeding line would've pushed this into 6 star territory. But he didn't so fuck him.
Yokozuna & Crush v Typhoon & Mabel (Wrestling Challenge, 7/31/94)
Came across this on DVDVR and thought it sounded interesting. "Interesting" is about as far as it got, although I dug it for what it was (7 minutes of three superbeefs and a big hoss clubbering and so forth). Typhoon and Yoko do a great shoulderblock spot early where Yoko does his awesome teeter-totter sell after two big BEEFY shoulderblocks before eventually going down on the third. Then he gets up and takes a swing at nothing before falling on his rump. Crush and Yoko take over when Crush hits a side kick on Mabel. Looks like he's trying to hit him in the head, but he's standing too close when he throws it and his foot gets swallowed up by Mabel's gut. It tickles me to hear Stan Lane commentate on "expert martial arts" that look even worse than his. Crush's kick to the back of Typhoon's head that sends him reeling into a big belly-to-belly from Yoko is a nice finish, but I'm watching this with the memory of Chris Adams obliterating Kevin Von Erich with a superkick to the back of his head fresh in my mind, so some piddly Crush version seems less impressive.
1994 WWF Project
Saturday, 18 February 2012
Tonight Down Here in Mid-South I Watch the Cars Rushin' by Home From the Mill. There's a Beautiful Full Moon Rising Above the Mansion on the Hill
Brad Armstrong v Ted DiBiase (1/16/85)
This was super solid stuff; not spectacular, but I can get behind a nifty 10 minute TV match no problem. Armstrong is pretty bland, but he works the headlock well and they do some neat stuff around it. He also takes a nasty bump into the middle turnbuckle where it looked like he smashed his nose off the middle rope (which would've hurt like a bitch). Ending is good with DiBiase wrapping Brad's leg around the ring post and slapping on the figure-four for the submission. I remember really liking their arena match that's coming up soon, but this was a fine "lead-in."
Kevin Von Erich v Chris Adams (1/18/85)
This was a really bossy 5-6 minute brawl. I get the sense I would've liked it even more if I hadn't seen them have longer, better, crazier matches on the Texas set, though. Not necessarily a criticism of the match in front of me, but still, it is what it is. There's a few brutal superkicks here. Someone grabs a chair early and the ref' seems content to just let it fly, so as Kevin is charging Adams with the chair, Adams pulls up and superkicks it back in his face. A little later Kevin is chasing Adams around ringside, Adams slides in, and as Kevin comes in behind him Adams fucking WASTES him with a superkick right under the chin. The third one at the finish is just the meanest bastard of a superkick you'll see, square in the back of the head. I'm surprised it didn't blind him. This basically feels like the starter in Houston for the main course in Dallas, but it's a Hell of a starter.
Buddy Landel, Chavo & Hector Guerrero v Rock 'n' Roll Express & Joe Lothario (1/18/85)
I definitely liked this one less than the elimination match with Dundee and Porkchop in the RnR's place, but it was still a lot of fun. The Guerreros' bumping and stooging wasn't quite as transcendently great here, but Lothario punches them in the face and they still fly around for every shot, so you can't complain too much. After a while it looks like the heels are going to take over on Gibson, but then he just kind of rolls away and tags in Ricky. I was grateful, because Ricky Morton playing Ricky Morton is better than Robert Gibson playing Ricky Morton. Chavo hits an awesome delayed belly-to-belly in this; he just snaps his hips around and really plants Morton. Landel was pretty much a non-factor here other than doing his multiple missed elbow drops spot that he liked to do, but these matches have mostly been about the Guerreros and Jose Lothario, anyway. I'm wondering how many guys could make 98 year old Jose looks as good as the Guerreros do...I'm not coming up with very many names.
Mid-South Project
This was super solid stuff; not spectacular, but I can get behind a nifty 10 minute TV match no problem. Armstrong is pretty bland, but he works the headlock well and they do some neat stuff around it. He also takes a nasty bump into the middle turnbuckle where it looked like he smashed his nose off the middle rope (which would've hurt like a bitch). Ending is good with DiBiase wrapping Brad's leg around the ring post and slapping on the figure-four for the submission. I remember really liking their arena match that's coming up soon, but this was a fine "lead-in."
Kevin Von Erich v Chris Adams (1/18/85)
This was a really bossy 5-6 minute brawl. I get the sense I would've liked it even more if I hadn't seen them have longer, better, crazier matches on the Texas set, though. Not necessarily a criticism of the match in front of me, but still, it is what it is. There's a few brutal superkicks here. Someone grabs a chair early and the ref' seems content to just let it fly, so as Kevin is charging Adams with the chair, Adams pulls up and superkicks it back in his face. A little later Kevin is chasing Adams around ringside, Adams slides in, and as Kevin comes in behind him Adams fucking WASTES him with a superkick right under the chin. The third one at the finish is just the meanest bastard of a superkick you'll see, square in the back of the head. I'm surprised it didn't blind him. This basically feels like the starter in Houston for the main course in Dallas, but it's a Hell of a starter.
Buddy Landel, Chavo & Hector Guerrero v Rock 'n' Roll Express & Joe Lothario (1/18/85)
I definitely liked this one less than the elimination match with Dundee and Porkchop in the RnR's place, but it was still a lot of fun. The Guerreros' bumping and stooging wasn't quite as transcendently great here, but Lothario punches them in the face and they still fly around for every shot, so you can't complain too much. After a while it looks like the heels are going to take over on Gibson, but then he just kind of rolls away and tags in Ricky. I was grateful, because Ricky Morton playing Ricky Morton is better than Robert Gibson playing Ricky Morton. Chavo hits an awesome delayed belly-to-belly in this; he just snaps his hips around and really plants Morton. Landel was pretty much a non-factor here other than doing his multiple missed elbow drops spot that he liked to do, but these matches have mostly been about the Guerreros and Jose Lothario, anyway. I'm wondering how many guys could make 98 year old Jose looks as good as the Guerreros do...I'm not coming up with very many names.
Mid-South Project
Friday, 17 February 2012
Pirata Morgan -- YOUR One-Eyed Psycho Motherfucking GOD
El Hijo Del Santo v Felino (CMLL, 4/5/96)
I had no idea this even happened, so I was pretty psyched when I came across it on the '96 yearbook. Unfortunately, it wasn't nearly as good as I was hoping. I mean, I wasn't expecting it to hit the heights of their '98 Monterrey match, but I still figured it could've been really good. Definitely wasn't terrible, but still disappointing. First two caidas are pretty short, but the matwork in the primera was solid enough. Felino isn't a guy I think of as one of the all-time great lucha mat workers - nor is Santo for that matter...maybe - but I always dig these two working the mat against each other -- Felino is always someone I can buy being genuinely petrified of being caught in the camel clutch. Third caida is really what makes the match, though. Santo has had some of the most spectacular dives in lucha for the last 20+ years (shit, it's closer to 30 now), and he hits a couple corkers in this. You can see about three rows of spectators scatter as he's gearing up for his tope, and when Felino crashes into the fixed seats and almost tears an entire row off the floor, you understand why. And sure enough Felino fights and fights and fights, but Santo WILL have that camel clutch. Not the classic they're capable of having, but plenty good. Still, it's all background noise to what I really wanted to talk about...
Pirata Morgan v Masakre (Hair vs. Hair) (2/28/92)
THIS was the fucking greatest. Pirata Morgan is pretty much a God when it comes to working hair matches. He punches you right in the face, takes outright insane bumps, bleeds like a fucking faucet, and generally brings everything you'd want someone to bring in an apuestas match. He jumps Masakre at the start, and the first fall, which lasts only a few minutes, is basically him opening Masakre from ear to ear and drinking his blood. He bites him in the open cut and gets right in there for a mouthful of it, then he spits the blood in the air like Masakre's head was a water fountain. He doesn't half ass this -- it's Gangrel drinking out of that goblet and spitting it everywhere, except Pirata is actually doing it with real blood. When Masakre fights back in the second fall Pirata takes one of the nastiest postings I've ever seen (you audibly hear the THUD) and bleeds all. over. the. place. I'm not sure anybody takes a posting like Pirata Morgan. There's a post in the third fall where Masakre is repeatedly drilling his head into the post and Pirata is taking all of them completely unprotected. He also takes a crazy bump from the apron to the floor that was pretty unnecessary in amongst all of the other mutilation he'd inflicted upon himself already. Masakre is a capable brawler, mostly stumbling around selling the blood loss when he's not beating someone up, and Pierroth plays a Hell of a second to him, but it's Parata's performance that makes this so awesome. He really looked like one of the best wrestlers in the world here.
I had no idea this even happened, so I was pretty psyched when I came across it on the '96 yearbook. Unfortunately, it wasn't nearly as good as I was hoping. I mean, I wasn't expecting it to hit the heights of their '98 Monterrey match, but I still figured it could've been really good. Definitely wasn't terrible, but still disappointing. First two caidas are pretty short, but the matwork in the primera was solid enough. Felino isn't a guy I think of as one of the all-time great lucha mat workers - nor is Santo for that matter...maybe - but I always dig these two working the mat against each other -- Felino is always someone I can buy being genuinely petrified of being caught in the camel clutch. Third caida is really what makes the match, though. Santo has had some of the most spectacular dives in lucha for the last 20+ years (shit, it's closer to 30 now), and he hits a couple corkers in this. You can see about three rows of spectators scatter as he's gearing up for his tope, and when Felino crashes into the fixed seats and almost tears an entire row off the floor, you understand why. And sure enough Felino fights and fights and fights, but Santo WILL have that camel clutch. Not the classic they're capable of having, but plenty good. Still, it's all background noise to what I really wanted to talk about...
Pirata Morgan v Masakre (Hair vs. Hair) (2/28/92)
THIS was the fucking greatest. Pirata Morgan is pretty much a God when it comes to working hair matches. He punches you right in the face, takes outright insane bumps, bleeds like a fucking faucet, and generally brings everything you'd want someone to bring in an apuestas match. He jumps Masakre at the start, and the first fall, which lasts only a few minutes, is basically him opening Masakre from ear to ear and drinking his blood. He bites him in the open cut and gets right in there for a mouthful of it, then he spits the blood in the air like Masakre's head was a water fountain. He doesn't half ass this -- it's Gangrel drinking out of that goblet and spitting it everywhere, except Pirata is actually doing it with real blood. When Masakre fights back in the second fall Pirata takes one of the nastiest postings I've ever seen (you audibly hear the THUD) and bleeds all. over. the. place. I'm not sure anybody takes a posting like Pirata Morgan. There's a post in the third fall where Masakre is repeatedly drilling his head into the post and Pirata is taking all of them completely unprotected. He also takes a crazy bump from the apron to the floor that was pretty unnecessary in amongst all of the other mutilation he'd inflicted upon himself already. Masakre is a capable brawler, mostly stumbling around selling the blood loss when he's not beating someone up, and Pierroth plays a Hell of a second to him, but it's Parata's performance that makes this so awesome. He really looked like one of the best wrestlers in the world here.
Saturday, 11 February 2012
If You See Her, Say Hello, She Might be in Tangier. She Left Mid-South Last Early Spring, is Livin' There, I Hear
Butch Reed & Ernie Ladd v Magnum TA & Master Gee (Ghetto Street Fight) (11/4/84)
I'm not really sure what the difference between a regular street fight and a ghetto street fight is. Maybe you need black people to be involved for it to be "ghetto." I mean, Ernie Ladd is black, but he looks about as un-ghetto as possible. Wearing chinos and a polo shirt to a ghetto street fight? Ghetto? Not really. Awesome? Fuck yes. He looks like he just played a round of golf. My memory of this was that it was great, but I was in full on Reed man crush mode when I first watched it so I figured that probably made it seem better. This time...honestly, I might have liked it even more. Master Gee is still pretty crummy (although there's a cool moment where he gets down off the apron and stands eye-level to Magnum to try and rally behind him as he's getting worked over, which I thought was a nice bit of apron work), but the other guys more than carry the load. It still has the annoying tendencies that most no DQ tags in Mid-South seemed to have, in that they don't necessarily work it "clean," but they don't go full on Duggan/DiBiase level violent. The ref' still tries to enforce the rules, but when Reed throws Magnum over the top rope or repeatedly whips him with a belt right in front of his face, he can't exactly throw the match out. There seems to be a ton more leeway when these no DQ matches/street fights are 1-on-1. Magnum takes another first class ass stomping here, like he has just about every time he's shown up on the set. He also bleeds and bleeds, then he bleeds some more. Reed was probably my favourite guy in this, though. He catches Magnum with a big forearm that knocks him loopy and he does this dance after it because he's so happy with himself. Fergie tries to stop him from whipping the skin off Magnum's back with a belt so Reed gets right in his face and says "Motherfucker, you want some of this?" Then he goes back to whipping the skin off Magnum's back. He and Ladd also bump around like crazy. Shit, Ladd might have even eclipsed Butch fucking Reed as your #1 bump machine of the night. LOVED the finish to this. Magnum has made the hot tag and all Hell has broken loose, but as Ernie is trying to put a figure four (or maybe it was a spinning toe hold) on Magnum he winds up coming away with Magnum's cowboy boot. You just see his face light up as he's lucked his way into this new toy, and sure enough he winds up blasting Master Gee in the back of the head so Reed can score the win. Crowd is outraged and start chucking stuff at the ring, but Reed and Ladd don't care; they're off to the clubhouse (although Reed had better change first).
Buddy Landel, Chavo & Hector Guerrero v Brickhouse Brown, Bill Dundee & Jose Lothario (Elimination Match) (11/16/84)
God damn, the resemblance between Hector and Eddie is unbelievable. They're the SAME fucking person. You can just tell Eddie got so much of his shtick from Hector, because if you sub out Hector for 1997 Eddie, this match turns out basically the exact same (although I think Eddie could crawl across the ring faster). The way they bump off backdrops is even identical (and they both get ridiculous height on them). The Guerreros were amazing here. Match starts out with Lothario decking Hector with a punch, and Hector's sell of it was just indescribable. Then he decks Chavo and Chavo tries to top Hector (he doesn't quite do it, but he comes pretty close). Lothario is borderline immobile, but he throws good punches and has a nice backbreaker, and that's really all the Guerreros need to work with. Speaking of good punches, Bill Dundee was in this match and threw GREAT fucking punches. There's a spot where Hector tries to sneak in and blindside Jose, so Billy comes in and cuts him off with a corker of a right hand. Hector sells it like he's Hector and/or Eddie Guerrero. The whole first stretch consists pretty much entirely of heel horseshit and stooging and it was just awesome. Match does sort of dip at a few points, and after the first elimination it doesn't really hit the highs of the first section, but I was having a blast practically the whole time regardless, and this is another match that was way better than I remembered. The Guerreros were SO fucking great, man.
Rock 'n' Roll Express v Midnight Express (Scaffold Match) (12/2/84)
Yeah, so the Bill Dundee v Koko Ware scaffold match on the Memphis set has basically ruined every other scaffold match in history on account of how fucking good it was. It's hard enough to reach "decent" territory in a match like this, never mind what Dundee and Koko managed. I mean, this was perfectly fine for a scaffold match, and probably the second best in history, but even Eaton taking a backdrop off a reversed piledriver and landing face first isn't going to propel it to Dundee/Koko levels. It's not like it's "disappointing." How can a match that is pretty much destined to suck in the first place regardless of the participants be disappointing? Shit, this was probably BETTER than it had any right to be. But...every scaffold match that isn't Dundee/Koko just...well, they're not Dundee/Koko. These are two of my favourite teams in history...but they're not Bill Dundee and Koko Ware. It's like if Bruce Springsteen sang 'Tangled Up in Blue.' Half the posts in this blog are titled with lines from Springsteen songs, so you can probably guess that I'm a Springsteen fan. He's hands down my favourite artist in the history of music. He could probably do a mean rendition of 'Tangled Up in Blue.' I can imagine him singing "THE ONLY THANG I KNEW HOW TO DO WAS KEEP OWN KEEPIN' OWN LIKE A BIRD THAT FLEEEEEEEW, TANGLED UP IN BLUEEEEEE" and I'd no doubt dig the absolute shit out of it. But he's not Bob Dylan, and if you're not Bob Dylan, you're not nailing 'Tangled Up in Blue.'
Adrian Street v Terry Taylor (Loser Leaves Town) (12/7/84)
I liked Street quite a bit in this, but for a loser leaves town feud-ender, there wasn't really any urgency or...anything to set it apart, really. Still, Street had a bunch of great stuff when it came to working holds. He does this super nasty looking takedown where he hammerlocks Terry's arm and at the same time twists his neck around before just dragging him down to the mat. Then he grabs an armbar and starts bending his fingers, sitting with a knee across his throat and pulling his hair while the ref' is giving him a talking to about something else. He also does all of his fairy shtick and prances around and pinches the ref's butt. Terry gets about 40 seconds of offence the whole match and Boesch says "Terry Taylor is setting the pace." Boesch is basically 'Crazy Ralph as pro-wrestling commentator' from this point forward. "This place is cursed...cursed...it's got a death curse."
Mid-South Project
I'm not really sure what the difference between a regular street fight and a ghetto street fight is. Maybe you need black people to be involved for it to be "ghetto." I mean, Ernie Ladd is black, but he looks about as un-ghetto as possible. Wearing chinos and a polo shirt to a ghetto street fight? Ghetto? Not really. Awesome? Fuck yes. He looks like he just played a round of golf. My memory of this was that it was great, but I was in full on Reed man crush mode when I first watched it so I figured that probably made it seem better. This time...honestly, I might have liked it even more. Master Gee is still pretty crummy (although there's a cool moment where he gets down off the apron and stands eye-level to Magnum to try and rally behind him as he's getting worked over, which I thought was a nice bit of apron work), but the other guys more than carry the load. It still has the annoying tendencies that most no DQ tags in Mid-South seemed to have, in that they don't necessarily work it "clean," but they don't go full on Duggan/DiBiase level violent. The ref' still tries to enforce the rules, but when Reed throws Magnum over the top rope or repeatedly whips him with a belt right in front of his face, he can't exactly throw the match out. There seems to be a ton more leeway when these no DQ matches/street fights are 1-on-1. Magnum takes another first class ass stomping here, like he has just about every time he's shown up on the set. He also bleeds and bleeds, then he bleeds some more. Reed was probably my favourite guy in this, though. He catches Magnum with a big forearm that knocks him loopy and he does this dance after it because he's so happy with himself. Fergie tries to stop him from whipping the skin off Magnum's back with a belt so Reed gets right in his face and says "Motherfucker, you want some of this?" Then he goes back to whipping the skin off Magnum's back. He and Ladd also bump around like crazy. Shit, Ladd might have even eclipsed Butch fucking Reed as your #1 bump machine of the night. LOVED the finish to this. Magnum has made the hot tag and all Hell has broken loose, but as Ernie is trying to put a figure four (or maybe it was a spinning toe hold) on Magnum he winds up coming away with Magnum's cowboy boot. You just see his face light up as he's lucked his way into this new toy, and sure enough he winds up blasting Master Gee in the back of the head so Reed can score the win. Crowd is outraged and start chucking stuff at the ring, but Reed and Ladd don't care; they're off to the clubhouse (although Reed had better change first).
Buddy Landel, Chavo & Hector Guerrero v Brickhouse Brown, Bill Dundee & Jose Lothario (Elimination Match) (11/16/84)
God damn, the resemblance between Hector and Eddie is unbelievable. They're the SAME fucking person. You can just tell Eddie got so much of his shtick from Hector, because if you sub out Hector for 1997 Eddie, this match turns out basically the exact same (although I think Eddie could crawl across the ring faster). The way they bump off backdrops is even identical (and they both get ridiculous height on them). The Guerreros were amazing here. Match starts out with Lothario decking Hector with a punch, and Hector's sell of it was just indescribable. Then he decks Chavo and Chavo tries to top Hector (he doesn't quite do it, but he comes pretty close). Lothario is borderline immobile, but he throws good punches and has a nice backbreaker, and that's really all the Guerreros need to work with. Speaking of good punches, Bill Dundee was in this match and threw GREAT fucking punches. There's a spot where Hector tries to sneak in and blindside Jose, so Billy comes in and cuts him off with a corker of a right hand. Hector sells it like he's Hector and/or Eddie Guerrero. The whole first stretch consists pretty much entirely of heel horseshit and stooging and it was just awesome. Match does sort of dip at a few points, and after the first elimination it doesn't really hit the highs of the first section, but I was having a blast practically the whole time regardless, and this is another match that was way better than I remembered. The Guerreros were SO fucking great, man.
Rock 'n' Roll Express v Midnight Express (Scaffold Match) (12/2/84)
Yeah, so the Bill Dundee v Koko Ware scaffold match on the Memphis set has basically ruined every other scaffold match in history on account of how fucking good it was. It's hard enough to reach "decent" territory in a match like this, never mind what Dundee and Koko managed. I mean, this was perfectly fine for a scaffold match, and probably the second best in history, but even Eaton taking a backdrop off a reversed piledriver and landing face first isn't going to propel it to Dundee/Koko levels. It's not like it's "disappointing." How can a match that is pretty much destined to suck in the first place regardless of the participants be disappointing? Shit, this was probably BETTER than it had any right to be. But...every scaffold match that isn't Dundee/Koko just...well, they're not Dundee/Koko. These are two of my favourite teams in history...but they're not Bill Dundee and Koko Ware. It's like if Bruce Springsteen sang 'Tangled Up in Blue.' Half the posts in this blog are titled with lines from Springsteen songs, so you can probably guess that I'm a Springsteen fan. He's hands down my favourite artist in the history of music. He could probably do a mean rendition of 'Tangled Up in Blue.' I can imagine him singing "THE ONLY THANG I KNEW HOW TO DO WAS KEEP OWN KEEPIN' OWN LIKE A BIRD THAT FLEEEEEEEW, TANGLED UP IN BLUEEEEEE" and I'd no doubt dig the absolute shit out of it. But he's not Bob Dylan, and if you're not Bob Dylan, you're not nailing 'Tangled Up in Blue.'
Adrian Street v Terry Taylor (Loser Leaves Town) (12/7/84)
I liked Street quite a bit in this, but for a loser leaves town feud-ender, there wasn't really any urgency or...anything to set it apart, really. Still, Street had a bunch of great stuff when it came to working holds. He does this super nasty looking takedown where he hammerlocks Terry's arm and at the same time twists his neck around before just dragging him down to the mat. Then he grabs an armbar and starts bending his fingers, sitting with a knee across his throat and pulling his hair while the ref' is giving him a talking to about something else. He also does all of his fairy shtick and prances around and pinches the ref's butt. Terry gets about 40 seconds of offence the whole match and Boesch says "Terry Taylor is setting the pace." Boesch is basically 'Crazy Ralph as pro-wrestling commentator' from this point forward. "This place is cursed...cursed...it's got a death curse."
Mid-South Project
Thursday, 9 February 2012
Stay Hard, Stay Hungry, Stay Alive if You Can, and Meet Me In a Dream of This Mid-South Land
Terry Gordy v Hacksaw Duggan (8/3/86)
Kind of in the same vein as Gordy/Doc -- just two big surly motherfuckers charging at each other to see who budges first. Ross is in full hyperactive FRUITY DELICIOUS FRUITY FRUITY SKITTLES mode on commentary, which some will hate and some will love. I'm still a fan of ol' JR though, so I thought his call of the whole thing was pretty great. I'm trying to think if there are any regular 1-on-1 Duggan matches I like more than this. The DiBiase series is amazing, but their matches on this set all have stips. The Sawyer barfights are incredible, but I have a hard time calling them "regular 1-on-1" matches, even if they don't necessarily have a stip (well, there's the dog collar match, but I'm pretty sure the November '85 match is stip-less). Did he have anything in the WWF that's even close to being this good? Whatever; point is this fucking rules. I really liked how it was structured, especially. Gordy never quite "takes over" and has a real control segment. He kind of works on top for a large stretch, but Duggan is constantly fighting back through sheer fucking willpower and refuses to stay down for any length of time. It's pretty back-and-forth, but it doesn't feel like they're working "my turn/your turn". It leads to Gordy using the sleeper and the oriental spike just to ware him down, and Duggan is all cock-eyed and stamping his feet while trying to get to the ropes or break the hold some other way. TV time limit finish is annoying, but I'm used to shitty 80s finishes at this stage in my wrestling fandom.
Terry Taylor v John Tatum (8/17/86)
"Tatum...he gets the darndest looks in his face." I remembered nothing about this, but the Tatum stuff on the Texas set and the Fantastics six-man I watched last week had me geared for some more Tatum, and I wasn't disappointed. He just stooges to the fucking moon here. He pouts and makes AMAZING whiney faces early, then when he takes over it looks like he's about to start crying after ever pin that doesn't keep Terry down. He's like a kid that REALLY wants that video game, but his parents won't buy him something with such an abundance of titties and curse words, no matter how much he begs. Shit, he actually kind of looks like Ohtani when he used to do the whole crying after ever nearfall thing, except Ohtani wasn't out and out TRYING to make people want to punch him in the nose. They have an awesome exchange towards the end where Taylor is lighting him up with punches and Tatum is practically dead on his feet, basically swinging out of instinct before finally falling flat on his face. Taylor hotshotting himself on the top rope off a missed cross body looked nasty, and his flying forearm looked great, but this was pretty much a Tatum show.
Hacksaw Duggan, Terry Taylor & Bill Watts v The Fabulous Freebirds (8/17/86)
Oh man, the pre-match of this totally rules. Watts is out with a baseball bat and calls it his "wing clipper". Hayes is irate and wants no part of this shit, calling Watts a maniac and refusing to compete. Watts says they have no guts and that he'll show them where Badstreet really is and Gordy is losing his shit. Hayes and Gordy are up on the stage where Ross is doing his announcing and Watts says he doesn't care where he has to fight them, whether it's in the ring or up there. Jim is all "Oh I don't like this situation one bit." Watts heads up to the stage with a ball bat and Ross is caught in the middle of it all so he just JUMPS off the fucking stage to get away. Eventually Buddy Roberts comes out (I think this was supposed to be Watts & Taylor v Gordy & Hayes initially) and then the locker room half empties to try and talk Watts out of murdering someone with a baseball bat. Eventually Duggan talks him down and the match becomes a six-man tag, which is then a shit ton of fun on top of the awesome pre-match stuff. Hayes is such a great scuzzy shithead, mocking Duggan's puffed out chest with hands on hips pose and bolting out of dodge when Duggan gets in the ring. Taylor is no Ricky Morton, but the Freebirds do a fine job playing your Midnight Express and constantly running distractions and double teams. Watts coming in off the hot tag and blasting Gordy with a right had was fucking great. Out of control DQ finish was unsurprising, but otherwise this was a blast. They also play Born in the USA for like 3 minutes while showing a bunch of crowd shots of people with no teeth or shoes. That was awesome.
Ted DiBiase & Dr. Death v Michael Hayes & Buddy Roberts (Lumberjack Match) (8/31/86)
After coming out of the Texas set thinking Michael Hayes was the king of the ten minute out of control brawl I was pretty psyched for this. Maybe my expectations were too high, but it never really did anything for me. I mean, on paper this shit is way up my alley, but I thought it was "just okay." They do some cool lumberjack spots where Hayes and Buddy try to bail only to be tossed right back into the thick of it, and Hayes trying to lynch DiBiase looked super nasty and awesome, but I'd forgotten most of the rest of it 10 minutes after watching it. Which is strange since ten minute out of control Michael Hayes matches don't tend to fall into that category (at least not after the Texas set).
Mid-South Project
Kind of in the same vein as Gordy/Doc -- just two big surly motherfuckers charging at each other to see who budges first. Ross is in full hyperactive FRUITY DELICIOUS FRUITY FRUITY SKITTLES mode on commentary, which some will hate and some will love. I'm still a fan of ol' JR though, so I thought his call of the whole thing was pretty great. I'm trying to think if there are any regular 1-on-1 Duggan matches I like more than this. The DiBiase series is amazing, but their matches on this set all have stips. The Sawyer barfights are incredible, but I have a hard time calling them "regular 1-on-1" matches, even if they don't necessarily have a stip (well, there's the dog collar match, but I'm pretty sure the November '85 match is stip-less). Did he have anything in the WWF that's even close to being this good? Whatever; point is this fucking rules. I really liked how it was structured, especially. Gordy never quite "takes over" and has a real control segment. He kind of works on top for a large stretch, but Duggan is constantly fighting back through sheer fucking willpower and refuses to stay down for any length of time. It's pretty back-and-forth, but it doesn't feel like they're working "my turn/your turn". It leads to Gordy using the sleeper and the oriental spike just to ware him down, and Duggan is all cock-eyed and stamping his feet while trying to get to the ropes or break the hold some other way. TV time limit finish is annoying, but I'm used to shitty 80s finishes at this stage in my wrestling fandom.
Terry Taylor v John Tatum (8/17/86)
"Tatum...he gets the darndest looks in his face." I remembered nothing about this, but the Tatum stuff on the Texas set and the Fantastics six-man I watched last week had me geared for some more Tatum, and I wasn't disappointed. He just stooges to the fucking moon here. He pouts and makes AMAZING whiney faces early, then when he takes over it looks like he's about to start crying after ever pin that doesn't keep Terry down. He's like a kid that REALLY wants that video game, but his parents won't buy him something with such an abundance of titties and curse words, no matter how much he begs. Shit, he actually kind of looks like Ohtani when he used to do the whole crying after ever nearfall thing, except Ohtani wasn't out and out TRYING to make people want to punch him in the nose. They have an awesome exchange towards the end where Taylor is lighting him up with punches and Tatum is practically dead on his feet, basically swinging out of instinct before finally falling flat on his face. Taylor hotshotting himself on the top rope off a missed cross body looked nasty, and his flying forearm looked great, but this was pretty much a Tatum show.
Hacksaw Duggan, Terry Taylor & Bill Watts v The Fabulous Freebirds (8/17/86)
Oh man, the pre-match of this totally rules. Watts is out with a baseball bat and calls it his "wing clipper". Hayes is irate and wants no part of this shit, calling Watts a maniac and refusing to compete. Watts says they have no guts and that he'll show them where Badstreet really is and Gordy is losing his shit. Hayes and Gordy are up on the stage where Ross is doing his announcing and Watts says he doesn't care where he has to fight them, whether it's in the ring or up there. Jim is all "Oh I don't like this situation one bit." Watts heads up to the stage with a ball bat and Ross is caught in the middle of it all so he just JUMPS off the fucking stage to get away. Eventually Buddy Roberts comes out (I think this was supposed to be Watts & Taylor v Gordy & Hayes initially) and then the locker room half empties to try and talk Watts out of murdering someone with a baseball bat. Eventually Duggan talks him down and the match becomes a six-man tag, which is then a shit ton of fun on top of the awesome pre-match stuff. Hayes is such a great scuzzy shithead, mocking Duggan's puffed out chest with hands on hips pose and bolting out of dodge when Duggan gets in the ring. Taylor is no Ricky Morton, but the Freebirds do a fine job playing your Midnight Express and constantly running distractions and double teams. Watts coming in off the hot tag and blasting Gordy with a right had was fucking great. Out of control DQ finish was unsurprising, but otherwise this was a blast. They also play Born in the USA for like 3 minutes while showing a bunch of crowd shots of people with no teeth or shoes. That was awesome.
Ted DiBiase & Dr. Death v Michael Hayes & Buddy Roberts (Lumberjack Match) (8/31/86)
After coming out of the Texas set thinking Michael Hayes was the king of the ten minute out of control brawl I was pretty psyched for this. Maybe my expectations were too high, but it never really did anything for me. I mean, on paper this shit is way up my alley, but I thought it was "just okay." They do some cool lumberjack spots where Hayes and Buddy try to bail only to be tossed right back into the thick of it, and Hayes trying to lynch DiBiase looked super nasty and awesome, but I'd forgotten most of the rest of it 10 minutes after watching it. Which is strange since ten minute out of control Michael Hayes matches don't tend to fall into that category (at least not after the Texas set).
Mid-South Project
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