Friday, 28 February 2020

A buncha World Wrestling Federation -- for over fifty years, the revolutionary force in sports entertainment!

I've been cherry-picking stuff on the Network the last couple days and today, hungover to hell and crippled with hamstring DOMS, I wrote about some of it. Here are words.


Ricky Steamboat v Bret Hart (Boston Gardens, 3/8/86)

Hokey karate WWF Steamboat is sort of a pale imitation of Mid-Atlantic Steamboat. At least that is what we have always been led to believe. I don't really give a shit if it's actually true but even if he's not a pale imitation you'd at least rather him lighting people up with chops than the hokey karate. But even at that he's pretty easily a few steps ahead of most wrestlers in the WWF at this point in time. Bret isn't setting the world on fire in 1986 but he's rock solid and this was basically that: rock solid. Bret jumps Steamboat at the bell, but before long Steamboat takes over and Bret does his awesome corner bump. It's Steamboat working the arm early and we know how that goes. He has some pretty, pretty good armdrags and Bret is a good base for it all. Jimmy Hart is a constant stream of gibberish on the floor and Steamboat tells him to shut up to a nice pop. Bret takes over by doing something I've forgotten about now and his control segment was decent. He works the back/midsection and even if WWF Steamboat isn't throwing mean chops he can still sell his butt off. He sells his butt off. Bret's offence and strikes always look nice and tight, his stompy punches are fine if not spectacular, he has good cut-offs, etc. Also has a killer backbreaker and I love that Steamboat sold the effect of it by writhing up on his shoulders right until Bret tried his next move (which was the elbow off the middle rope. Which missed). Did every Steamboat match in the WWF have him take a phantom pinfall? Bret gets one on him here and I don't remember any other babyface having so many matches where they were booked to look like, were it not for a ref' bump, they would have lost the match clean as a sheet. If one were the cynical sort then one might suggest this was intentional on the part of Vince in order to make former NWA darling Ricky Steamboat look WEAK and maybe sometimes PITIFUL but then Vince would never be so NEFARIOUS, would he? No no of course not. Anyway this was some fine professional wrestling.


The Rockers v Orient Express (Royal Rumble, 1/19/91)

Yeah, this still rules. It maybe took a little to get rolling and they probably overreached a bit on a couple of the double teams, but they're minor complaints. Structure is a little different as they sort of tease a couple FIP spells without going all in on them, which makes it it looks like it might end up being mostly heel in peril and that's not the best scenario even if it'd still work, but then the Express take over with the awesome double hot shot on Michaels and we get our proper heat segment. They work Shawn's throat which is always going to score some bonus points. Fuji jabs him in the throat with the cane and I love Tanaka's little karate thrusts right under the chin, which are almost as good as his Kabuki style leaping forearm. Man I love that move. He's also able to make a nerve hold somewhat decent because he'd slyly choke Michaels at the same time. A treasure of a wrestler, Pat Tanaka. Awesome spot where Michaels takes his upside down corner bump, ends up on the apron and Takana comes sprinting across to thrust kick him back into the ring. I also love the spot leading to the hot tag with Michaels jumping into the belt that causes the Orients to bump heads. They actually do a few really fun bits around the heels running into each other, one early on where Jannetty leapfrogs over both of them and they collide, then one later where they stop short of bumping heads again, take a bow because they've avoided making the same mistake twice, and as they're doing that Michaels runs over and gives them a double noggin-knocker. First few minutes were interesting because they work pretty clean and equal, and we even got Jannetty and Kato doing the Ric Flair headscissors into bridge into backslide spot. Midway in they kind of work a reset that leads to stereo dives and you can tell that they worked hard to come up with ideas for cool double teams and the like. Not all of them were perfectly smooth, but it's easy to appreciate the effort. Finish is pretty great as well. Ten years ago I'd have pointed to this as the best Rockers match ever, and even if I'd probably lean Rockers/Powers of Pain now it'll always be a personal favourite. The Rockers were great.


Ric Flair v Randy Savage (Wrestlemania VIII, 4/5/92)

I'll probably always love this on some level. At least one of their matches in WCW is probably better (the '95 Great American Bash?), but this one has the nostalgia factor as I remember taping this as a kid and writing "Hoosier Dome" on the label because I guess I thought that was the name of the event or something and kids are stupid. Savage is great in a hate feud because he'll often just grab someone by the face and try to yank their nose off. He did that several times to both Flair and Perfect. His bump over the ropes for Flair to take control was lunacy. He was full fucking vertical and because it came on the opposite side to the hard camera it looked like he got launched head-first into a volcano. Flair actually gets a longer run on top than I remembered and it's decent enough, but Savage selling the leg is where it's great and that doesn't come until later. Flair bleeds because of course he does and Heenan is apoplectic on commentary. I don't remember what did it now but Monsoon about snaps and I thought he was going to physically strike Bobby. Maybe it was when Heenan told him to take the bananas out his mouth. Great cheapshot from Perfect to set up Flair working the leg, and the leg work itself is good. I'll never tire of watching Savage try to punch a guy while hobbling around on one leg. I also like him grabbing Flair's tights at the finish because, honestly, Flair absolutely deserved it and Savage already had him dead to rights twice and Perfect saved his bacon. Savage is a man possessed after Flair puts the lips on Elizabeth and it takes all eleven of the Hebnar twins to restrain him. His post-match promo is wonderful Savage ridiculousness.


Bret Hart v British Bulldog (Summerslam, 8/29/92)

I've never loved this and think their In Your House match a few years later is much better, but it's one of those matches your Bret Hart fans will often point to as one of his definitive performances. With pretty good reason as well -- he was good in this and clearly carried the load because Davey - WHO WAS ON CRACK!!! - is fucked to bits after about six minutes. Bret works subtle heel and it was decent stuff. He grabs Davey by his hideous dreadlocks and yanks him up off the mat and I bet it hurt like a bastard because I don't think Davey was in any shape to cooperate with the bump. Bret's strikes look rock solid as they usually do, those stompy punches again and his European uppercuts were a nice addition, but he laid them in a little extra this time. Couple of his stomps to the face looked mean and he popped Davey with a real potato shot elbow. Heenan: "Right in the ol' fish and chips." Bret starts getting some nice heat after throwing Davey out the ring and Heenan ponders, "Why are these limeys booing? It was a good move!" Can we really argue with him? Bret's plancha looks way nastier on account of Davey being too gassed to know where he is and about getting his neck wrung when Bret needs to adjust. At one point Davey just chucked him from a military press position into the ropes and Bret landed all awkward and no wonder he talks about Davey being fucked up during this. They do lots of shots of Diana in the crowd showing ANGST and Heenan asks if it's Mike McGuirk. Someone please find that video of all the times Heenan tears into Mike McGuirk. Jeez Louise he was great; maybe the greatest. Match drags quite a bit in the middle, but it likely would've stunk outright if just about anybody else in the company at that point was in there with Davey Boy so absolutely fair play to yer Hitman. He's clearly trying his hardest to make a purse out of a pig's ear, and for a guy you'd never say was an obvious spot-caller there are points where he's obviously in Davey's ear (and I'm not saying that to knock him). Biblical reaction for the finish. They should run Wembley again. You know, the new one. Unless they're worried it starts pishing rain and everybody's fake tan gets streaky. 

Wednesday, 26 February 2020

Orihara and Ohtani hate each other very much. It is WAR v New Japan.

Shinjiro Ohtani v Masao Orihara (WAR, 1/16/94)

Man what the fuck? This was WAR v New Japan at its very best, delivering what might be the most under the radar classic of the entire feud. People who wound up being jaded with the direction of juniors wrestling will often point to that Ohtani/Samurai match from 1996 as an example of what it could've been (or what it SHOULD'VE been, by god! Prolly). It was less about the big moves and nearfalls and more about the strategy and limbwork that actually mattered and whatever. And like, I can get behind that because Ohtani/Samurai rules and lots of current junior heavyweight stuff kinda sucks. But at the same time fuck all that because Ohtani and Orihara TRULY reinvented the wheel two years earlier. This was bonkers. Orihara is such a great hate feud wrestler because he'll potato your skull in and blatantly stamp on your testicles, and pissed off Ohtani is my favourite Ohtani by miles so it's probably no surprise that he fits right in working a Tenryu fed. He spits in Orihara's face right at the beginning and for the next few minutes we get some back and forth niggliness punctuated by headbutts and slaps and mean mugging, two guys who do not like each other making it blatantly obvious. They trade missed elbows drops, do a rope running sequence, hit stereo dropkicks/spinning wheel kicks, and on the surface it's no different than your standard junior heavyweight parity exchange. Except you buy every move here as something that was intended to remove teeth. They never acknowledged the other's athletic prowess with a nod of respect, they got back up and started throwing crowbars or standing on the other's throat or hitting body slams that the other guy had very little say in taking. Then Orihara hits maybe the most insane piledriver I've ever seen. And then Ohtani responds with a completely ludicrous tombstone that Orihara takes on the side of his head like a psychopath. AND THEN Orihara responds to that with yet another piledriver, this time one of those Cactus Jack "snap" variations that about put Ohtani on his neck all Tiger Driver '91 style. I mean I guess the selling was ropey, but it wasn't like your fighting spirit no-sell rubbish and when have you ever seen someone give a shit about a piledriver in Japan anyway? There was at least DELAYED selling, like when Orihara collapsed after hitting the second piledriver like he had nerve damage. I'm willing to believe that the HATE carried them through and maybe this was in actual fact the pinnacle of selling in Japanese wrestling. Ohtani immediately spin kicking Orihara so hard he about caved in his temple was incredible so who even cares about selling a piledriver? Even the leg work in the middle of the match was fine. It probably wasn't ever going to go anywhere, but it was brief and they at least fought over it, and that usually consisted of them trying to pull each other's nose off or kicking each other in the throat. At one point Ohtani, lying supine on the canvas, slapped Orihara so hard I thought his eardrum exploded. The violence continued to escalate into the finishing run and at no point did it feel like they were just running through big nearfalls. There was a struggle over everything and it was all interspersed with nasty striking. None of the flying looked particularly graceful, it was sometimes messy, but it all landed with impact, like two guys trying to use their bodies as scud missiles rather than scoring points for aesthetics. Ohtani looked like he really wanted to take Orihara's head off with that springboard dropkick and Orihara's diving headbutt was just stupid brutal. Orihara moonsaulting off the top rope to the floor and landing on his feet is one of the craziest things I've ever seen. How he never crippled himself is beyond me and of course Ohtani spin kicked him clean in the face as soon as he landed. I'd take this easily over most of the heralded 90s New Japan juniors stuff.

Tuesday, 25 February 2020

Mid-Atlantic Boogie Jam '84 (3/17/84)

There's a decent amount of full shows from Mid-Atlantic, Georgia and various other territories on the Network now; lots of new stuff that had never seen the light of day before, as well as stuff that already had but obviously not with this remastered video quality. The Flair/Steamboat match from this show has apparently been around for ages, although I don't even know if I've seen it. So I just watched the whole thing. If nothing else it makes you ponder how much stuff WWE are sitting on. Just doing nothing in a vault somewhere. Wild.


Tully Blanchard v Dory Funk Jr.

Pretty fun Dory performance. I've sort of come around to enjoying Dory when he's in there with the right opponent. He worked this like a believable old-timey shooter type, where he'd randomly sandbag-but-not-ACTUALLY-sandbag in amusing ways and Tully would react in equally amusing ways. Tully would try to whip him from one corner to the opposite, but Dory would decelerate and sit on the mat, dragging Tully with him. Tully would be almost bemused and Dory would yank him into a headlock. Dory's abdominal stretch looked really tight as well, then he'd take Tully over and try to force his shoulder down, really making Tully work to make sure he kept at least one of them off the mat. His forearms were snug, the crowd were super into him; he brought what I wanted him to bring, basically. Tully ruled. He's one of the best ever at going from sniveling wee dickhead to just terrorising someone when he sees his chance. He was all over Dory at points and of course every single person in that arena hated his guts.


Ernie Ladd v Rufus R. Jones

Ladd is always an interesting watch. I'm not even sure I've seen anything from what you'd consider his prime, all of it has been late career when he's mostly broken down, but he's always fun and super charismatic and those legdrops are wonderful. Jones is fairly over and the crowd will pop for his shuckin' and jivin', although he's mostly broken down as well. So this was like five minutes of two guys who can no longer do a ton physically hitting the same notes these fans have seen for years. Ladd taking a bump off the top rope was surprising because I figured he was way past bothering with any of that shit in 1984 (and understandably so). Of course the legdrop still ruled.


Wahoo McDaniel & Mark Youngblood v Bob Orton Jr. & Don Kernodle 

This was real nice stuff. They went with the double heat segment and the crowd were red hot for all of it (a pattern with this show), but they also got pretty creative with how they filled the time. They could've worked a couple standard FIP segments, a couple hot tags, a few of your garden variety heel cut-offs and hope spots, and people would've gobbled it all up. But they ramped the surliness up to 11. Orton was a blast, hitting Youngblood with a military press slam in the ring and then later slamming him over the guardrail, which left him all mangled and contorted. He also makes a point of stopping the babyface from tagging out, making sure to grab Wahoo and keep him in his own corner after tagging in Kernodle. Even if it's not a big thing I always appreciate it when folks do that. Wahoo and Kernodle had a bunch of cool moments together as well. Wahoo gets thrown into the post to set up his heat segment early, then they run a great revenge spot later when Kernodle tries it again only to eat post himself. Wahoo was obviously chopping guys to bits and Kernodle was happy to bump around huge for all of them. At one point he basically did a full belly slide across the concrete outside. The second hot tag felt like a wee bit of an anticlimax, but it never fell flat with the crowd so it's hard to really complain. Crockett must've ran about eight million tags of similar quality throughout the decade and I could watch every single one of them no problem.


Great Kabuki, Gary Hart & Ivan Koloff v Angelo Mosca Sr., Angelo Mosca Jr. & Junkyard Dog

Perfectly solid six man tag, with the added bonus of Kabuki kicking people in the throat. His pre-match routine with the nunchucks, the ceremonial spitting of the green mist, the hair menacingly covering his face, even Koloff doesn't seem quite sure what to make of him. He threw two of his amazing thrust kicks and one of them was an absolute corker, right underneath Mosca Jr.'s chin. I'd never seen Mosca Jr. before but he was fine enough as your white meat babyface living off his old man's name. He was here to take a beating for a few minutes, hit a couple crossbodies, do a leapfrog and throw a forearm or three. I have absolutely no idea how long he wrestled or if he ever amounted to anything but I'm glad I can tick the Angelo Mosca Jr. match off the bucket list. Hart was what he needed to be on the heel end - a coward and a cheat, and in the end he paid for it.


Dick Slater v Greg Valentine (Cage Match)

This was quite literally a Greg Valentine slobberknocker, with all that entails, occurring within a metal cage that could be used as a weapon, with all that entails. It was fucking awesome. Babyface Valentine is a bit of a rarity and he totally ruled. He worked much the same as he would as a heel and was pretty reserved for the most part, at times almost embarrassed by the fact the people had adopted him as their own. But then as time went on he seemed to realise that it didn't matter how much of a mean bastard he was being; it just mattered that he was being a mean bastard to Slater. "Oh so I can punch him in the neck and elbow him in the ear and we're still good? Well hot damn, I'll do lots of that!" By the end he'd come to welcome the peoples' support and maybe even feed off it, though ultimately, when you get right down to the root of it, he was driven by the need to kick the living shit out of Dick Slater. Nine days a week I could watch Valentine beat the brakes off someone. It started almost immediately as Slater tried to trade body shots, and of course Valentine won that exchange and then just clubbed him in the throat because why the hell not. There was some headlock work early, but it was tight headlock work and more of a punctuation point between the fists and forearms. Slater was pretty great in this too. I'm not a huge Slater guy and sometimes his hamminess can be too much even for me, but he took his licks like a trooper and when it was his turn to dish out receipts he sure made the most of it. He took over with a fairly standard cage spot, where he grabbed Valentine's trunks and yanked him into it, but the set up for it was cool. Valentine was hammering away on him as was Valentine's wont, and Slater practically had to keep hold of those trunks just to stay on his feet. Eventually he goes down, but in doing so he can use his momentum and hurl Valentine into some steel. All of his headbutts looked nasty, his jab flurries, the way he'd just grab Valentine by the hair and repeatedly slam the back of his head off the canvas. The latter was one of those instances where he looked genuinely crazed, like he was trying to make an end of someone. Valentine's big revenge spots were home runs and I loved him choking Slater up against the cage, taking in the moment afterwards with a raised arm as the crowd went nuts. The finish also came across as something you'd get between two guys on their last legs, which was fitting considering how much they laid into each other in the last few minutes.


Ric Flair v Ricky Steamboat

This was probably the perfect litmus test for how much Flair I can handle these days. It's one thing watching him work a ten minute studio match with Sam Houston or twenty minutes with Magnum, but a full hour? Even if it's with Steamboat? in 2020? Who could possibly know?! Well he passed it pretty comfortably. I'm sure he definitely gives a shit, just as I'm sure you all do too. For about forty five minutes I thought this was excellent. I usually think of Flair as a broad strokes kind of guy, not really much of a details guy. He's more about the macro rather than the micro, but I thought this was one of his very best performances in terms of nailing the subtleties. When you take it as a whole it's still Flair doing what he often does when working long. He starts out sporting, begins to lose his composure, gets tetchy, gets nasty, gets desperate, and eventually sheds all the bullshit to be the man we all know he is deep down. He just went about that a little differently at points. We got the handshake at the start and then for about twenty minutes Steamboat controlled him utterly, first with a headlock and then with a front facelock. It was all nice and tight, especially the front facelock where you'd see Steamboat really grimacing, really looking like he was trying to unscrew Flair's head from his shoulders. Flair tried a few things, like driving Steamboat into the corner and then with some amateur wrestling of his own, but it got him nowhere and Steamboat was relentless. Even at a couple points where he could've thrown a chop he opted for the clean break, and one time he offered up another handshake in begrudging appreciation. The other subtlety in Flair's performance was how he sold and worked holds. I'd never call him a particularly special matworker and if we're comparing blond heel world champions then he's nowhere near as strong in that regard as Bockwinkel. This all had a real nice sense of struggle, though. Steamboat would crank on that facelock, take Flair down to the mat and try to pin his shoulders, Flair would try to use his own legs to hook Steamboat's in a cradle, they'd get back to a standing base and he'd try to grab Steamboat's head for a suplex, Steamboat would make a point of bobbing his head out of reach. They'd fight over a knucklelock, Steamboat would force Flair to the mat, Flair would have to bridge up on his neck to keep his shoulders up, he'd catch Steamboat in a body scissors, Steamboat would get back to a standing base with the body scissors still applied. None of the sequences were mind-blowing, but it was a really quick twenty minutes (as much down to Steamboat as Flair, obviously). Flair then started getting irritated and almost threw a punch before checking himself. He went in for a knucklelock and pulled back to do a strut instead, just to remind everybody who he is. I also liked how he sold Steamboat's Boston crab after the fact, how he'd do some quick stretches and try to loosen out the lower back. By the halfway point he hasn't acted like a prick once. By the forty minute mark he's only thrown one chop and that was a miss. Then he cracks and shoves Steamboat, backs him into the ropes...and everybody knows what's coming. When he connects on that first chop and chucks Steamboat through the ropes the whole atmosphere just picks up. Flair going to the ribs not long after that was some good stuff. Steamboat sold all of it like he's Steamboat, but I liked how Flair barely threw any more chops and instead kneed and elbowed Steamboat in the side. Some of his forearms to the head looked really nasty as well and I sort of wish he did more of them. His abdominal stretch also ruled and I loved how it looked like he was trying to rip Steamboat in half. Last ten-fifteen minutes were my least favourite of the match, as they kind of moved past all that awesome build and struggle in the first three quarters to go into your big Flair stretch run. There was good stuff in there. Steamboat staggering around like he'd been shot in the stomach was that guy in a nutshell and you know the crowd was biting on just about everything, but for all the work Flair did on the midsection it felt like they probably could've dropped the headlock-into-bridge sequence just this once. Still, the Flair staple spots are a horse long dead and beating on it at this stage is something neither of us can be arsed with. At its best this was terrific, at its worst it was good, and as a whole it was a remarkably quick sixty minutes. That in and of itself is impressive.


Jimmy Valiant v Assassin #2

This was what it was, which meant it was exactly what it needed to be. You'd think after a half hour cage match and an hour long title match this crowd might've been burned out, but then you'd be dead wrong because this was about as much sustained heat as you could want. The pop for Assassin #1 being escorted from ringside, Paul Jones' reaction to being tied to Dusty with no help, the Boogie Woogie Man beating Assassin #2 around the place, the people were through the roof for all of it. Once or twice Jones would try to scoot around and give his man some advice, but Dusty would yank him back with the bullrope and ring that cowbell like "oh no you don't." The pop for Valiant pulling #2 into the post by the balls, then the gasps of horror when #2 loaded up the mask and bonked Valiant with a headbutt. The finish, the set-up, the post-match. A great little spectacle to cap off a killer show.

Monday, 24 February 2020

More Hansen Being Very Hansen

Stan Hansen & Dan Spivey v Mitshuaru Misawa & Toshiaki Kawada (All Japan, 11/16/91)

One of the all-time great pissed off screwball Hansen performances. He was a riot in this, jumping Misawa before the bell and about planting him fully vertical with a back suplex. The amount of shit he gave Misawa early had Misawa as annoyed as I've ever seen him. This wasn't stoic Misawa who'd maintain his composure and strike when the moment was right -- Hansen had pushed the wrong buttons and Misawa was going to cave his face in. There was one point where he had Hansen tangled in the ropes and raining down holy hell with elbows. A couple of the Hansen/Kawada exchanges were up there with their very best, culminating with Kawada biting off more than he could chew and Hansen punching him dead in the cheek, which in turn led to an extended Kawada heat segment. Before that Kawada's aggressiveness had served him pretty well, but it was most effective in tandem with Misawa's and as soon as he tried to go it alone he paid big time. Spivey was mostly just there and his Boston crab was pretty loose, so Hansen would keep it interesting by coming in and stomping repeatedly on Kawada's head, and a little later applied one of his own where he sat across the lower back with the full beef of Borger, Texas. Best moment of the match was when he grabbed a chair and, completely unprompted, smashed it over Kawada's spine, then hurled it across the ring at Misawa who went fucking apeshit in response. The way he went for Hansen was amazing; Hansen chucking him over the barricade like a small child even more so. The first elbow Misawa threw at Hansen after the hot tag was truly jaw-shattering. I watched this about ten years ago and loved it, so I'm happy it held up. One of my favourite All Japan tags of the decade.


Stan Hansen v Kenta Kobashi (All Japan, 3/27/92)

More of a condensed, low-key version of this match-up, but then even the low-key version of these two is going to bottom out at pretty great. It's everything that makes it a timeless pairing. Kobashi is dogged and his refusal to stay down in the face of such a mauling is inspiring, while Hansen does what he always does and overwhelms Kobashi with redneck fury. Kobashi dips into his big bag of offence and once or twice it looks like he might sustain a real advantage, but then Hansen will outright punch him in the face or boot him in the throat and shut him down. We get the staple powerbomb on the floor and I love how Kobashi just stares dead at the ceiling afterwards like "why do I keep getting in the ring with this man?" Hansen going after the neck for a bit and sort of using the dragon sleeper as a base was a really cool wrinkle as well, one that I don't remember him using in their other matches. He's such a big guy that you can easily buy him smothering you with something like that. Incredible finish as well, with Kobashi seemingly coming up with a way to avoid having his head taken off, only to turn around and have his head taken off. There was also a moment in this at the very start that encapsulates everything great about Hansen. He drags Kobashi to the floor and tries to wade into the crowd for a chair. The barricade blocks his way, but in his haste to procure a weapon he doesn't seem to realise that the gate opens towards him. He tries to shove it the opposite way but of course that's not how it's supposed to open. So instead of stopping for literally one second to open it correctly, the way the gate was intended to be opened by design, he just boots it inward until the hinge no longer has any say in the matter. Bend to his will or be broken. The Hansen way.

Sunday, 23 February 2020

Hansen v Williams; Hansen v Funks!

Stan Hansen v Steve Williams (All Japan, 6/5/90)

There's been a fair bit of talk recently about what a "hoss fight" is and/or should look like. Among wrestling fans, obviously. Hoss fight isn't currently a topic of discussion on BBC Question Time. But in the wake of that last NXT TakeOver where Keith Lee and Dominik Dijakovic had the match they had, the question has been posed: can it really be considered a hoss fight when the two hosses are wrestling like cruiserweights? What constitutes a hoss fight in the first place? Does the mere presence of hoss-like individuals mean that, by definition, a hoss fight is in the offing? All very pertinent queries. I suppose, as my great grandmother used to say, one man's motherfucker is another man's fucker of mothers, so maybe each and every one of us has a different definition of what hoss fight truly entails. And this felt like a hoss fight to me. A couple brick shithouse bruisers being brick shithouses and leaving bruises on each other. Nothing fancy, everything messy, everything nasty. I think 90s Hansen is my favourite Hansen at this point. He isn't as much of a straight ahead whirlwind as he was in his physical prime, but he has that vulnerability in the 90s that comes with age and his body breaking down a bit. He feels more and more beatable, ever so slightly less like a force of nature but a human being you can strategize against. Doc's strategy was to clobber him in the head until he drew blood, then clobber him some more until he couldn't get back up. Of course you know the bit about a wounded animal and when it's most dangerous so there was always the possibility of Hansen decapitating him at the drop of a hat. The brawling wasn't always the most compelling because I'm not sure Williams in general was the most compelling yet, but they certainly never mucked around with anything elaborate. It was all close quarters, almost no ground given, everything that was come by required a struggle. It wasn't as chaotic as a Funk v Hansen or even Funk v Brody, but it had the feel of those Doc v Gordy brawls from Mid-South and there won't be many instances where I complain about that. The finish was also straight out the top drawer of your Western Lariat murder scenes.


Stan Hansen & Dan Spivey v Terry & Dory Funk (All Japan, 11/15/90)

The Funks feel so out of place in All Japan at this point. It's sort of charming and I wish there was more of it. And hey, this was a super fun ten minutes. Terry v Hansen is a GOAT level match-up so of course their exchanges were amazing. Terry gets clubbed about the head, falls out the ring, falls over the barricade, gets walloped with chairs and tries to throw a box full of drinks at Hansen. His flurry of jabs to Spivey late on popped the crowd something fierce and I love that he stopped mid-combo to hiptoss an onrushing Hansen. Even if you'll never get Dory being as expressive as his brother I liked him going right at Hansen with his uppercuts and forearms, and the bit where he grinds the sole of his boot into Hansen's nose was one of the meanest versions of that spot I've seen. He couldn't really do a ton physically, but the people went wild for the spinning toe hold and it was an awesome moment when he locked it in.

Saturday, 22 February 2020

Low-Ki v Joe...and no honour in sight

Low-Ki v Samoa Joe (ROH Glory By Honor, 10/5/02)

Pretty spectacular US indie approximation of a Battlarts murderfest. It's billed as a fight without honour, which I guess at the time meant it was a street fight, or a match without any rules, or maybe just a match where they didn't need to shake hands first. Either way they absolutely leathered the tar out each other. Some of the striking was outrageous. Everything was nasty right from the start, but it was more niggly than full on in your face "why would you willingly be hit like that in a fake fight?" type stuff. They work the guard with some sharp elbows and headbutts, then Joe grabs a leg and applies a disgusting half crab where Ki's neck is trapped under Joe's knee. Then they stand up, slap each other really hard across the face and the violence continues to escalate from there. Ki was a cyclone of kicks and forearms and he made it his mission to chop every bit of skin on Joe's upper body. A few times he'd just latch onto Joe and try to secure an armbar or choke and Joe reversing a dragon sleeper into a death valley driver was incredible. I don't know if it was a conscious decision for Joe to sell exhaustion the way he did or he was legitimately being worn down (by the sort of punishment it very definitely would've sucked to be on the receiving end of), but I liked how it came across. Where his size would normally be advantageous, at least in that he could outhit most guys, nobody can outhit Low-Ki and so it almost ends up having the opposite affect. Can't outhit him, can't match his engine...what chance have you got? By the end he looked about on his last legs and you can't blame him for it one bit. I could've done without the ropey no-sell strike exchange towards the finish, but I guess it had a payoff, if you count Low-Ki unloading with about fifteen absurd punts to the face before dropping Joe with an overhand club the the back of the head as a payoff. And I mean, why wouldn't you?

Friday, 21 February 2020

Misawa/Kawada v Jumbo/Taue - The First Meeting!

Mitsuharu Misawa & Toshiaki Kawada v Jumbo Tsuruta & Akira Taue (All Japan, 9/30/90)

To nobody's surprise this was not a bad wrestling match. It had lots of really good stuff and some that was great. It's just that, at this point in my life as a wrestling fan, 45 minutes of a style I don't love like I once did was always going to be a bit of a bumpy ride. But it's these four so, you know. I thought Misawa was excellent in this. He was more assured here than in either of the Jumbo singles matches and best of all he was SURLY. Maybe it was because of Jumbo's general presence, maybe he was still pissed at Taue jumping ship, but either way he was about as grumpy as I can remember seeing him. Even in that very first exchange with Jumbo he looked like a man who was there to claim his rightful spot in the pecking order, and he carried that attitude with him the rest of the way. I'm not sure Kawada was all that great yet but he was certainly starting to look more like the Kawada we became accustomed to, at least in that he'd dropped the spinning wheel kicks and quasi-juniors offence for the short kicks and knees to the face. Taue really took a shit-kicking and I thought the strongest section of the match by a mile was his extended heat segment. Him and Kawada hated each other to death around this point and Kawada kicked him in the head many times, but Misawa was downright Tenryuish in how he'd just stomp his skull into the canvas. Taue getting opened up and it leading to some working of the cut naturally appealed to the vampire in me as well. That the proper heat segment came later, after they teased it early on when Taue started bleeding to begin with, is one of those cool bits of foreshadowing 90s All Japan did so well. I also thought the match hit a wall after Taue finally tagged out, which came at about half an hour in. It's not that it went off a cliff or anything, but it felt like they started to run out of ideas down the stretch. Even if I don't have much interest in going back to those '95 tags that went an hour or even the Kobashi/Kawada broadways, they had their formula down by then and the pacing and transitions were much sharper. Still, this was the first time anybody had gone this long in years so it's hard to be too critical. I suppose overall it held up pretty well. I think I'd need to watch 90s All Japan in small doses nowadays, but this did give me an itch to open that book again.

Thursday, 20 February 2020

Tenryu's Dirty, Mean and Mighty Unclean. He's a Wanted Man, Public Enemy Number One.

Genichiro Tenryu, Stan Hansen & Samson Fuyuki v Jumbo Tsuruta, Yoshiaki Yatsu & Great Kabuki (All Japan, 7/3/89) - SKIPPABLE 

Well you can add Hansen v Kabuki to the Whiskey & Wrestling dream match catalogue. I think this is the first time I've ever seen them together and it was easily my personal highlight of the match. When Hansen whipped Kabuki into the ropes I figured the latter was getting his arse handed to him and his offence in return would be close to nonexistent. But then Kabuki blasted him under the chin with a thrust kick and reeled off a flurry of uppercuts, and Hansen selling Kabuki's offence really was a thing of beauty. Hansen never even tried to murder him in response and the fact he immediately tagged out instead went a decent way towards putting over Kabuki as being dangerous. I imagine a seven minute singles match would've been great fun. Nothing else here was all that good, unfortunately. They had some okay ideas and a few of them landed initially, like Kabuki and Jumbo almost coming to blows, or Tenryu about getting concussed, or any number of times where it looked like a heat segment might break out, but it was sort of all over the place structurally and nothing really had time to  resonate. Lots of abrupt momentum shifts, a whole bunch of "okay I'll go on offence now because you've hit enough moves," an inordinate amount of times where one guy would just blow something off and tag out. It was all very strange. Tenryu had an off night as well, though his exchanges with Kabuki will always be fun and these were no different. Hansen constantly raving like a headcase about whatever was amusing. He'd often come running in just to take a swing at someone, maybe because the crowd were dead, maybe because he was bored standing on the apron. Kabuki was the MVP pretty easily, and even though it's not hard to see why he was never held in particularly high regard I would like to reiterate that people were wrong. This was like 22 minutes and not terrible by any stretch, but nothing you need to see.


Genichiro Tenryu, Toshiaki Kawada & Samson Fuyuki v Giant Baba, Rusher Kimura & Masa Fuchi (All Japan, 9/15/89) - EPIC

Now we're talking. If the last match was Tenryu on an off night, this was him reminding us that he might've been the best wrestler in the world. He was unbelievable here and all three of his match-ups ruled, as did pretty much every single exchange he had. In some ways his performance drove the direction of the match. In the beginning he was in grump mode, but he wasn't chopping anybody in the throat or doing anything untoward. For about ten minutes that was reflected in the overall tone. Everything ticked along nicely, nothing was blow away amazing but it was perfectly good wrestling. Then the longer it went the more Tenryu's temper flared, and that rubbed off on his partners, and that really opened things up. It established a clear face/heel divide, where in the second half Tenryu and Footloose were the heels and everybody decided Fuyuki was a real bastard and booed his every action. Tenryu was throwing shots at everyone, whomping Fuchi with chairs, threatening to launch a table at Baba, stomping on Fuchi's face, chopping Kimura even further into decrepitude, punting Fuchi in the spleen and kidneys and really Fuchi must've done something to him at some point because he got the living shit beat out of him. Fuchi as face in peril being abused by an irate 40 year old isn't a role you associate with him, in fact you associate Fuchi with being the irate 40 year old abusing everybody else, but man was he exceptional in this. Within the first few minutes he was dribbling blood from his mouth and his extended heat segment midway in was what really propelled this into that upper tier. Kimura can't really do much other than throw headbutts and get chopped exceptionally hard in the chest, but of course he did all that to the best of his abilities. Baba ruled, though. He's the oldest and probably most broken down of the lot but he never wrestled like it. Sure his overhand chops aren't the nastiest overhand chops you'll ever see, and sure his offence can look a bit clunky, but fuck it, the people lived and died with him and everything he did in this was money. The stuff with Tenryu was wonderful. I'm a broken record going on about how Tenryu is a master at showing vulnerability in believable ways, but almost nobody could make Baba's strikes at this point in his career look as believable. That the old man was refusing to accept Tenryu as the new king only pissed Tenryu off more, so he'd routinely cheapshot him while Baba stood on the apron minding his own business. There was an amazing moment where Tenryu tried to almost fake Baba out with a chop, but Baba didn't buy it and stood there completely indifferent to it all. It was like that GIF where Matt Barnes fakes throwing the ball at Kobe's face and Kobe doesn't even blink. Solid opening third, great middle third, shit hot closing third. Awesome match.


Complete & Accurate Tenryu

Wednesday, 19 February 2020

Anjoh's a Different Kind of Daredevil Than a Lot of Folks I Know, but He Still Walks the Tightrope with no Net Down Below

Yoji Anjoh v Kiyoshi Tamura (UWF, 9/30/89) - GOOD

This might be my favourite ever non-RINGS shoot style match-up, and even then it's pretty close to any of those. Young Tamura is a phenom and even if he was never winning against Anjoh at this point you know he'd try his best to make it a contest. Anjoh was far more assured in the stand up, but there was one awesome part where Tamura's temper got the better of him - as it often would in his early career - and he tried to stomp Anjoh's head into the mat. Anjoh responded as we all knew he would and those headbutts to the cheek bone were nasty as fuck. You could already see the signs of Tamura becoming a world-class defensive grappler. He never really managed to turn those escapes into any sort of advantage here, but but he was wicked slippery and a nightmare to pin down for very long. Though I guess Anjoh never needed very long in the end and it would still be a couple years before Tamura would take him to the wire.


Complete & Accurate Anjoh

Tuesday, 18 February 2020

NWA Classics 24/7 #28

Chavo & Hector Guerreros v The Fantastics (Houston Wrestling, 8/3/84)

The structure of this was a bit ropey. Rather than your traditional southern tag formula, where in a perfect world Tommy Rogers takes a beating a few minutes as very few wrestlers take a beating like Tommy Rogers, and very few teams are as good as the Guerreros at dishing one out, we got three mini heat segments on Bobby Fulton, who felt a bit off during this. He wasn't bad or anything, but there were a few miscues and it made some of the double team spots feel a little contrived, or at least less organic than they usually do. Of course the people still lost it for the double row boat, and the headlock noggin knocker, and basically everything else for that matter because it's these four and they are very good at what they do. You've just seen those things done a little smoother, or a little quicker, with a little less setup. Chavo and Hector putting cool spins on otherwise standard spots will always rule so obviously I loved the finish, which gave us a picture perfect Tommy Rogers dropkick as a bonus. Not their best match together, but of course it was good, and really, I'll take every new bit of footage involving these guys I can get. It'd be foolish to complain.

Sunday, 16 February 2020

I Got My New Boots Covered in Red Dirt, My "Don't Mess with Mid-South" T-Shirt

Ric Flair v Wahoo McDaniel (7/12/85)

Alright, so, I think the actual date for this is 7/26. I watched it last year after two Flair/Wahoo matches dropped via the Houston footage, and at the time I thought this was the one that didn't make the Mid-South set (as the footage wasn't available), but no, it's the one that did make it. So there's another Flair/Wahoo that's new and the date on that is actually 7/12. I think. It doesn't really matter anyway because it's not like anybody's using this stupid blog as a historical resource, so I'll just stick with the 7/12 date since that's what it's listed as on the set. Either way I'll copy and paste what I said about it last year. This was pretty great when they were lacing into each other. The arena isn't mic'd up too well so you don't always get to hear the thwack on strikes, but some of these Wahoo chops are audible regardless. Flair has great chops, he always has, but he can't swing that knife edge like Wahoo and he's never had anything close to the overhand, so for once he's basically outmatched. And that was kind of the story. Flair will try and go toe to toe, but not only does it never end well for him, it never even approaches level footing. He'll throw one chop, maybe two at a push, and Wahoo will shred him. Flair simply can't hang. So I guess he decides he'll use the ropes at every opportunity and just cheat his way to victory. Maybe it was deliberate on the wrestlers' part, maybe it was a story they were actively telling, maybe I'm just projecting, but Flair's best friend in this match was the ring rope and if not for that he'd have been fucked. He wasn't only using it to cheat either. There were a few points where Wahoo dropped him with a chop or a tomahawk and Flair only escaped by draping a foot over the rope. Late on he tried to take it to the floor, but that backfired as well and it was him who wound up with a bloody forehead. Still, the ropes weren't going anywhere and they were always there to bail him out. Flair winning via dodgy pinfall with his feet on the ropes wasn't exactly a rarity, but I don't remember it ever being built to quite like that. Maybe that "build" was coincidental. It probably was, honestly. Either way it worked and overall this was good stuff.


Ted DiBiase & Dr. Death v Jake Roberts & The Barbarian (7/14/85)

I think Jake and Barbarian are still technically heels at this point, but people are so nuts for the DDT that in a heel v heel match you can bet the team with Roberts ends up as de facto babyface. They still walked that line though, being more than happy to play the same games had that been a Rock n Roll Express or Fantastics across the ring. All of the early stuff ruled. There are a hundred million ways to incorporate a DDT tease into simple spots and this crowd bit on even a sniff of one. Jake and DiBiase are tentative to start because I guess they both know what depth the other is willing to stoop to, so they fake each other out with a few punches, Ted goes for a kick to the gut, Jake catches it and spins him around, and the place just erupts when he tries to grab him for that DDT. A bit later Jake is in there with Williams, sees an opening for the DDT, and everybody loses it the second he makes an attempt. It was absurdly over. Jake was also really fun working the apron, shit talking Williams and DiBiase, ruffling Williams' hair when he got close, always skulking about like a menace on the peripheries. Loved the big transition into the heel workover. Up to that point Jake and Barbarian had been far superior as a unit bending the rules to their advantage. Then Jake holds Williams so Barbarian can take a swing, but maybe this time they've bit off more than they can chew as the ref ejects Barbarian and Jake turns around into DiBiase's loaded glove. Jake is such an awesome face in peril here. We get plenty of nasty offence targeting the cut, like Williams grating the sole of his foot over it, some forehead biting and DiBiase hitting his killer fist drop, but Jake's sell of the blood loss is really tremendous. At one point he sort of staggered onto the apron, then got tangled up in the ropes as Williams and DiBiase clobbered away on his bloody forehead. Odds were never going to be good on a clean finish, but the brawl after the ref gets bumped went on longer than I remembered and felt really chaotic. You had Jake battering guys with a cowboy boot, Williams battering guys with a loaded cast, and of course the pop for the DDT was crazy. I think this is the last time we see heel Jake on the set and it was a heck of a swansong.


Mid-South Project

Saturday, 15 February 2020

Flair v Magnum

Ric Flair v Magnum TA (World Pro Wrestling, 2/23/86)

I haven't watched a Flair/Magnum singles match in forever. I couldn't even tell you at this point which ones I've seen. I know one of them made the AWA set but by the time I got to it the voting deadline had passed so I skipped over it. Maybe I should go back and give it a shot because this was pretty damn great. It was mostly your standard fare early, but Magnum looked really imposing in control. Flair tries a bunch of different things and all roads lead back to him being gorilla pressed or otherwise chucked about like a large child. The way he took over by using Magnum's own momentum to throw him out the ring was a nice bit of champion's smarts, and it led to a longer run of Flair in control than I'd have expected. His rabbit punches to open up the cut looked real nasty and he was super animated the whole time, jawing with folk in the crowd and looking about ready to punch Tommy Young in the mouth once or twice. Magnum's comeback ruled. He has this awesome quality during his comebacks where people truly buy his opponent being in deep shit. When he grabbed that chair leg from Tully you feared for Blanchard's life and when he roared like a big old lion here you knew Flair was in trouble. His slow turn to face up the champ, the way Flair backed into the corner, the look of horror as he knew he'd pissed off the wrong jeans- and leather-wearing biker, it was so great. Flair's going to do that against pretty much everybody anyway but this felt extra special. I dug Flair just trying to get himself disqualified by hurling Tommy Young by the shirt as soon as Magnum applied the figure four. Magnum pleads with him not to call for the bell, Tommy eventually acquiesces, and Flair realises that he's somehow only gone and made a bad situation even worse. Great spot where he's trying to crawl away after Magnum had pummeled him with a series of punches. Magnum stalks him down the whole time and Flair uses the turnbuckles to pull himself upright, then as Magnum grabs him by the trunks to drag him back into the middle Flair goes low with his heel. Ref bump at the end looked a bit crummy initially, but fair play to Tommy Young for producing a better sell job of the leg than most wrestlers. This also has one of my favourite dodgy Flair finishes and all in all I liked it a ton, despite it being something I wasn't massively excited for going in.

Friday, 14 February 2020

Some Mid-Atlantic TV

Jake Roberts & Ricky Steamboat v The Grappler & Super Destroyer (Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling, 11/18/81)

I thought this was an awesome little match. You know how these studio tags tend to go. Usually they'll be way more frantic than they'd be in an arena, less about milking the big spots and payoffs, more about working sharp and heated in the closer environment. Sometimes that'll mean the structure takes a hit because they'll only have four or five minutes to work with, but this had double that, none of the individual segments felt rushed, they built heat with a short and effective babyface workover, everything they did looked snug, etc. It was just really good stuff all the way through. Jake and Steamboat are such a fun unit and I'm not sure I've seen them pair up before. They were clearly the two young studs of the territory at this point and they worked like it. The early exchanges were great, the way everybody worked in and out of quick headlocks, lots of quick leg trips, how each team tried to make the quick tag and maintain the advantage before the other team could make their own tag. Jake's headlock on the Grappler was one of the best I've seen in ages and what made it better was how Grappler put up a struggle to get out of it. He managed to almost shift around onto his stomach and reverse it, so Jake bridged up to his feet in one motion and used his height to leverage Grappler back to the mat. It was an awesome spot, one I think I've seen Jake do before, but this felt properly organic and came off smooth as butter. He eventually takes a turn in peril and Grappler and Super D throw a bunch of tight forearms and elbows, nasty ones to the midsection, a couple right on top of the head, really cutting the ring off and working in tandem to keep him isolated. This also might be the first time Jake busted out the DDT on TV as even Caudle was taken aback by it (he referred to it as a "front bulldog of sorts"). Non-finish isn't surprising, but it leads to a nice heated brawl afterwards with Steamboat and Piper. Hard to ask for much more.


Tully Blanchard v Manny Fernandez (Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling, 2/9/85)

Bring back the TV title already. Seriously, it's such an easy way to build or put heat on wrestlers without actually requiring someone to outright lose. WWE have what, ten hours of content on television every week? More than that? In this workrate world that's surely enough time to throw out a fifteen minute time limit draw. Tully is really a master - maybe THE master - of working this sort of match. He can spend the first half on the back foot in a thousand different and satisfying ways, can take over through shenanigans, kill some more time working over the babyface, then when his back is up against the wall he can run down the clock to save his belt. The first six or seven minutes of this had Manny on top with Tully trying and failing to gain a foothold. We got some nice leg work, and there was this cool little moment where Manny took a bit too long to hook in a submission, so Tully just reversed it into one of his own and made Manny fight to regain control. Usually in those situations the person in Tully's shoes would lay there waiting for Manny to finish rallying the crowd, even if plausibly they could've done something to escape in that time. I love Fit Finlay because he'd never let your rest on your laurels like that and Tully has a lot of the same qualities. He won't let you forget that it's supposed to be a contest. I don't know if anybody right now is as good as Tully, but the framework for something like this isn't that difficult to replicate. In the end your heel escapes by the skin of his teeth while still looking smart and competent, while your babyface takes it right to the wire and might've pulled it off with an extra minute or two. Or in this case, had Tully not decided to just chuck him over the top rope.

Thursday, 13 February 2020

The Alamo Busters (or the Original Guerreros)!

Chavo & Hector Guerrero v Shawn Michaels & Mike Jackson (11/8/84)

How about that for an all-star babyface team? Michaels was 19 here and looked 14. Mike Jackson was probably in his thirties and looked 44, like he always did. Was this the Midnight Rockers version of Eaton and Koko Ware's Midnight Express that never was? In an alternate universe did Michaels fling Mike Jackson through a barber shop window? This was the Guerreros' debut in Mid-South, though they'd been killing it in Houston for a while. You can figure out how this went; the Guerreros got four minutes to do their thing, the babyfaces landed a few hits, but ultimately the result was never in question. Jackson's rolling single leg crab looked slick as you like, at least. He strung together a few dropkicks, then in one of those cool little bits of attention to detail you get in Guerreros matches, his last attempt was thwarted when Chavo shoved Hector out the way. Hector's twisting splash always looks a million bucks and it's been a minute since I've seen that double team finisher. 


Chavo & Hector Guerrero v Brickhouse Brown & Master G (Mid-South, 11/22/84)

I obviously love the Guerreros. They're a huge personal favourite of mine and whether it's a three minute studio match or a twenty minute arena match, a tag match or they're working singles, I'll be interested in watching it. I love the Guerreros. But beyond that they feel pretty clearly and legitimately like one of the best tag teams of the 80s. They're creative as heck and it's fairly evident that they try to add fresh new wrinkles into everything they do. This time Chavo hit a headscissor takedown on Master G and that started off a sequence of G hitting several headscissor takedowns on both Guerreros. They underestimated his big tall fella agility! That then led to G holding onto the top rope as he had another headscissors on a standing Chavo, and as Hector came around on the apron G swung Chavo through the ropes and into his brother's kneecaps to knock him off the apron. Finish was cool as well, with Brickhouse grabbing Hector in an airplane spin and Chavo whacking him in the gut with a bandoleer. Just a super fun little four minute TV match, which is the Guerreros' bread and butter. Watts remarking that they don't look the way Americans would typically think Mexicans look because they're not itinerant farmers or labourers, and in fact own condominiums in Texas and drive a Porsche, was...well it was something, I guess. 1984 was wild as fuck.


Chavo & Hector Guerrero v Rock n Roll Express v The Fantastics v Midnight Express (Mid-South, 2/10/85)

What a frustrating thing this is. Not because of anything the wrestlers did -- that was about as good as you'd expect from everyone involved. I mean look at those names, you know what you're getting. We just have a deeply unfortunate big stupid bastard commercial break that cuts out not only what appeared to be a Tommy Rogers in peril segment, but a lengthy Ricky Morton in peril segment as well. And lots of Guerreros shenanigans as Joel Watts explains on commentary how Chavo and Hector bludgeoned Morton with their bandoleers! I'll assume this would've been top 20 on the Mid-South set if we had it in full. Maybe the uncut version is sitting pretty in a WWE vault somewhere. Anyhow the Guerreros are so good. Hector gets popped by a Morton right hand and takes an amazing face-first bump to the canvas, then gets up and popped again and takes an amazing bump onto his back. Chavo's horse shit on the apron ruled and at one point he dropkicked Bobby Fulton in the arse through the ropes. And then their offence is impeccable as Chavo fucking murders Rogers with the greatest delayed northern lights suplex we've ever seen. It goes to commercial right as Hector hits a butterfly suplex and you just know for a fact the Rogers beatdown would've been immense. Somehow this is Joel Watts' fault. Leading up to that we got lots of fun interactions between all four teams, everybody playing some chess, some guys trying to strategically effectuate certain match-ups. The RnRs and Fantastics are on good terms and bask equally in any humiliation of the other two teams. When Rogers and Morton end up in there together - which Cornette just gleams at - they have a nice respectful exchange. They trade a couple headlocks, a few snap armdrags, it was almost a precursor to your indie standoff of the future. Then they fist bump in acknowledgement and go punch a Guerrero or Midnight Express member, which of course counts as a legal tag. The Midnights/RnRs section at the end probably wasn't on the level of their absolute best stuff together, but it's these guys, it's a bloody foreheaded Ricky Morton getting pummeled, it's Dennis Condrey dropping knees on his throat, it's Cornette battering someone with a shoe. Come on, this was never going to be anything short of good. You just know there was an incredible part that we missed out on.



Wednesday, 12 February 2020

Flair/Arn v Dusty/Garvin (and the crowd goes wild)

Ric Flair & Arn Anderson v Dusty Rhodes & Ron Garvin (Worldwide, 2/22/86)

These Worldwide crowds are insane. It's consistent, ballistic heat; obviously more so when your Dustys and Flairs are in there, but it's not just a star power thing. Every episode from around this period has some of the best crowds ever in wrestling. It's very awesome. This was also a wonderful little five minutes. It's a hyper-condensed southern style tag and they make the absolute most of every second. Flair gets beaten from pillar to post in the first minute and I loved his spin on the Flop, the way he reached out to make the tag only to fall on his face. Then Garvin yanked him back up by the trunks, Flair's bare backside exposed to everyone, and swiftly chopped him back down to the mat. Dusty was outrageous in this. A complete whirlwind of charisma and his crowd connection was something otherworldly. He drops both Flair and Arn with an amazing double punch combo in their corner (after they try to hem him in there), runs over and leans out to give Baby Doll a kiss, then gives Garvin a kiss, then catches an onrushing Flair with an unbelievable flurry of jabs and elbows, then Flair turns around and sort of collapses in Tommy Young's arms. It's genuinely one of the greatest ten seconds I've ever seen in a match. I watched it six times in a row and I'll watch it six more times after I write this. Arn's look of sheer contempt when he finally gets in the ring is spectacular -- a man who is sick to the back teeth of this plumber's son. Add a great finish with maybe the biggest pop in recorded history and this is one of the best five minute matches there's ever been.


Tuesday, 11 February 2020

Tully and Arn! In Singles!

Arn Anderson v Sam Houston (World Championship Wrestling, 2/15/86)

Is it time we start a dialogue on Sam Houston? He'd been pushed as Dusty and Magnum's protege for about half a year by this point, they clearly had plans for him as he'd recently won the Mid-Atlantic title on TV...and then about a year later he was up in the WWF. And apparently he spent four years there but I would not have guessed that. He sort of faded into obscurity, basically. Which may have been a crying shame because he was starting to put it together nicely, really coming along as a fiery underdog babyface, and by golly he looked like the bee's knees here. Did somebody miss the boat big time on Sam Houston? This started out with Arn fully on his own bullshit, first mowing Houston down with a big shoulder tackle - which Houston awesomely flip bumped off of - then opening the ropes for him in case our young cowboy wanted to cut bait before being humiliated. Arn is obviously all googly-eyed when Houston cartwheels out the way of a punch and connects with his own, and I love how Houston held the ropes open in case Arn decided HE wanted to cut bait. The angle late in '85 where the Andersons and Tully break Houston's arm is tremendous, so I loved Arn taking control by just smashing the wrist off one of the turnbuckles (bonus points for some booking continuity and all that). Arn's arm work was obviously good stuff, but I was super impressed by how Houston made it compelling on his end. It was some really good babyface work, how vocal he was in selling the pain, how he'd keep trying to fight out of holds or create openings, how he was never content to just take a beating and only show some fire when it was his turn for a hope spot. He'd even sell the arm after or during moves where the arm itself wasn't actually the focus, like when he ducked low for a backdrop and Arn elbowed him in the neck. He went over selling the blow first, but then he'd quickly clutch the bad arm and draw it in close to his body. His missed crossbody bump at the end was fucking wild too. This was Dustin Rhodes before Dustin even laced up a boot and possibly even more reckless. I thought this was a legitimately great 10 minute studio bout. Who's doing the deep dive on Sam Houston?


Tully Blanchard v Mike Jackson (World Championship Wrestling, 2/22/86)

We are truly blessed that, nearly 35 years down the line, we can go back and watch Tully Blanchard and Arn Anderson wrestle on TV just about every week. Crockett was next level in '86. This was only about eight minutes but it was a ridiculously fun Tully performance, which was pretty much his average around this point. You knew 2002 Tim Duncan was giving you 25 and 12 on a nightly basis. It was an inevitability and at a certain point became an accepted part of our lived existence. Death, taxes and Timmy Duncan. That's basically Tully in 1986 (with none of the geniality or respectable disposition). Mike Jackson is always rock solid - the late-career Timmy Duncan of enhancement talent? - and if you stick him in there was a proper foil you're usually getting something decent. He wasn't in the mood for Tully's horse shit and I guess Tully noticed this and decided to be an even bigger dickhead than usual. After Jackson won the first couple exchanges Tully tripped him off a clean break, just a total high school P.E. bully move by a guy who can't stand things not going his way. Then Tully backs him into the corner and slaps him across the face. Jackson is pissed and rips the straps down like Lawler in the Coliseum, so Tully bolts outside and has a good laugh to himself. We always talk about Arn being a guy who can flip that switch and go from bumbling stooge to stone cold killer, but Tully is equally great at going from shit-eating weasel to relentless hunter. He's not as methodical as Arn, where he'll pick a body part and go to work. It feels more vicious though, in part because it looks like he's enjoying himself in a way Arn rarely seems to. Arn ripping your shoulder apart is a means to an end but Tully will splat you on the concrete because it's amusing to him. The way he lost the plot after Jackson kicked him in the mouth was sensational. The sneer, the way he checked his lip for blood, how you knew right there the fun was over. It was like a cat toying with a mouse, then the mouse bit back and had to be put out its misery.

Monday, 10 February 2020

Tully v Dusty! On the Superstation!

Tully Blanchard v Dusty Rhodes (JCP Superstars on the Superstation, 2/7/86)

Tully was so good in this. I've always sort of taken for granted that he was a step below your guys like Arn, Eaton and Morton, but these days I'd pretty comfortably stick him in that same bracket. He was a phenomenal pro-wrestler. This started out with Dusty working the leg, which is how many a Dusty v Horsemen match would start around this time. Flair and his cousins broke Dusty's ankle so it made for an instant revenge hook any time they matched up for months afterwards. His leg work is fine enough, nothing particularly special or compelling but he's Dusty and the crowd are always with him. It's the way Tully reacts to and sells all of it that makes it stand out. Dusty will throw on a spinning toe hold so Tully will roll onto his belly to prevent that spinning toe hold from turning into a figure four. Dusty will try and drag him to the floor so Tully will push his free leg against the bottom rope to stop him, or at the very least make it difficult for him. It wasn't anything mind-blowing in isolation, but it creates that sense of struggle. He takes over when Dusty hits an elbow off the top and tweaks his own bad ankle, and there was a great bit right away where Tully would drive his knee into the ankle, selling that knee at the same time as Dusty had just wrapped it around the ring post not but a minute ago. Tully jumping a guy is like Pat Beverley playing man defence. He gives you no breathing room, just completely swarms you and on top of that he was rolling out some mean looking inverted Indian deathlocks. Both guys' punches looked amazing in this as well. Dusty's left jabs were as good as I've ever seen them, right up there with the best Lawler jab combos. There was an incredible bit where Tully was peppering Dusty in the corner with rights and lefts and Dusty's jelly-legged selling was out of this world. And JJ's interference, while fairly low key, made for a couple great little moments. The first was when Dusty left the ring to stalk him down and Tully lunged between the middle and bottom ropes to get at him. A bit later Dusty went after him again, but when Tully dove for him this time Dusty was ready and caught him with a peach of a right hand. I liked this a bunch and it might actually be my favourite of all their matches together.

Saturday, 8 February 2020

Bushwhacker Saturday (and other 1994 WWF)

The Bushwhackers v The Quebecers (RAW, 3/21/94)

I always dig how the Quebecers use their bodies as weapons. They'll just chuck each other around and land full force on somebody, whether it's a powerslam or a back body drop or their awesome somersault senton. We never got the latter here, but the back body drop spot looked great, with Pierre crushing Luke like it was Dick Togo at his very portliest in there. WWF Bushwhackers are so completely unlike Portland/Houston/Carolinas Sheepherders, maybe the ultimate WWF cartoonification of a gimmick that had been famous elsewhere. Duggan went from a blood-drenched brawling machine in Mid-South to a cross-eyed goober in the WWF, but he was still super over and mostly worked as walking tall babyface, albeit toned way down. I don't think Dusty took a blade to his forehead once in the WWF and they had him dance around in polka dots, but he was still Dusty by god Rhodes and more or less worked like it. Heel Sheepherders were so despised in Puerto Rico that when they ran an angle where Carlos Colon nearly stomped them to death, fans tried to break into the ambulance they were being carried out the stadium in just to finish the job. I've seen heel Sheepherders almost incite riots just by waving a New Zealand flag in some trucker's face. Babyface Bushwhackers ate sardines and bit opponents in the arse. And absolutely fair play to all of them for it. Get that WWF money without having to bleed buckets or get stabbed in the neck by pissed off rednecks. That's called working, brothers. Anyway this wasn't good.


Lex Luger v Rick Martel (RAW, 3/28/94)

Five years earlier with the roles reversed this probably would've been real good. By '94 Martel was a little more broken down and heel Martel was never as fun as babyface Martel anyway, even if the Model character is one I'll always kind of love for nostalgic reasons. He was an amusing shithead in this, though his chinlock was terrible and never made for much of a control segment. Luger worked a headlock when he was on top too so as a match it was sort of dull for stretches. Luger did start out as if he was pissed off, though. He got screwed over at 'Mania and early on he carried himself like a guy you'd probably not want to be in there with. You might even feel sorry for Martel if he was less obnoxious. But then if a frog had wings it wouldn't bump its arse when it hops. McMahon calls Luger an "extraordinary physical specimen; a tremendous mesomorph" and if I ever put money on any WWF commentator throwing out a Somatotype reference it would've been a substantial amount on Monsoon. I love that in about thirty years of watching this stupid nonsense they can still surprise me. Anyway this wasn't very good either.


Earthquake v Adam Bomb (RAW, 4/4/94)

Fun four minute hoss fight. Lots of missed elbow drops that landed with thuds, elbow drops that looked like they'd have busted up ribs had they connected, then when Earthquake finally hit on one it fairly squashed our man Adam into the canvas. Bomb always had a nice slingshot clothesline; always looked really impressive for a guy his size. His clothesline off the top is great as well as he'd get real height on it and land like a cruiserweight. Kane would do that top rope clothesline and he'd land on his feet, which is understandable because he's massive and like, go be safe out there, you know? But Adam Bomb is truly the lost worker of the 90s and hits it like a man half his size and weight, his body going full horizontal as he connects with it. Vince on commentary gets a bit ahead of himself at one point as Bomb covers Earthquake and McMahon tells the ref' to turn around and count. He'd only do that for the babyfaces, never the heels, so we know it's only a matter of time before Bomb chucks Wippleman and branches out on his own, redeemed in the eyes of gods and men.


1994 WWF Project

Friday, 7 February 2020

Is babyface Flair...the best Flair???

Ric Flair & Angelo Mosca v Greg Valentine & Hussein Arab (Maple Leaf Wrestling, 9/6/80)

Man, this absolutely ruled. What the hell? Why is this never talked about when one of the guys in it is the most talked about wrestler in the history of our great sport? How is there a Flair match this good that hasn't had eighty six thousand words written about it? Pre-world title babyface Nature Boy is so awesome. I never thought I'd get properly excited about Flair again, not after all this time when I thought I'd seen all I ever possibly needed to see from him, but I couldn't believe how impressive he was in this. His babyface energy was startling. This wasn't like when he'd work babyface after he'd won all those world titles. It wasn't even like that brief period in '85 when he worked babyface against the Russians, and that was him at the absolute peak of his powers. I've said this before, but a lot of babyface Flair still felt like heel Flair only dialed back a bit. He'd still do a bunch of the things he'd do as a heel, they'd just get the babyface pop because of who he was. In fact he could practically work heel opposite an actual heel, but if he was presented as a babyface and the fans were supposed to cheer him then the fans would cheer him. He was Ric Flair and could do whatever the hell he wanted. This, though, was a babyface who worked 100% like a babyface. In an alternate reality he took this act and paired up with a Ricky Steamboat and they became the greatest babyface tag team that ever lived. He strutted and woo'd but there was no arrogance to any of it. There was none of that veneer where you knew deep down he was still that same guy who'd pat you on the back then brag about your wife waiting in line for Space Mountain. At one point Mosca had Valentine in a bearhug and Flair strutted along the apron, started the crowd clapping along, then grabbed the house mic and folk just went apeshit wooing along with him. He was hitting running dropkicks instead of knife edge chops. Nothing was methodical; he was all energy, whether he was working the apron or coming in off the hot tag. The Valentine feud was in full swing so he was after him the whole time, getting super nasty by grinding his knuckles right into Valentine's nose (Valentine had broken Flair's nose not long before this) and popping him with elbows, rapid punch flurries to the gut, it all ruled. And man was he an awesome face in peril. He took two stints being beat on and both were great, but the second was where he got cut open and that was the strongest run of the match. Valentine was obviously being a nasty fuck, and the Sheik was a ton of fun throwing cheapshots and biting the open wound, but it was Flair's selling and sympathy-garnering that really made it. There was a great spot where he came in off the hot tag earlier and went for a big elbow on Valentine, really stopping to measure him before landing it, then when Valentine rolled out the way Flair just took an extra step in his direction and dropped it on him anyway. They repeat that spot during Flair's second heat segment, except this time Valentine drops four elbow attempts and Flair moves out the way each time, eventually scrambling into a neutral corner and leaping off the middle turnbuckle with a big Dusty style elbow of his own. It was as good a hope spot, with as perfect a sense of timing, as you could've asked for. Even the finish was great. After all those times we've seen him almost get caught out with a backslide, who'd have guessed he had the best backslide in his locker all along? Killer match. Everybody did their bit in it, but this was a Flair performance even the most jaded of us can appreciate.

Thursday, 6 February 2020

RINGS Battle Dimension 1: Osaka Metropolitan Circuit (3/5/93)

Masayuki Naruse v Nobuaki Kakuta

This was about a thousand times more spirited than I was expecting. Then again this is the second Kakuta fight in a row that's turned out to be good so maybe he is no longer the pits? Has Kakuta managed to put it all together as a master of the fake shootfighting? It was a pretty basic fight all in all; nothing particularly slick on the ground -- in fact, not much of anything was actually done on the mat because Kakuta is lost at sea as soon as he gets there, but that'll add to the drama when he's against someone capable and Naruse really played up that advantage. Kakuta isn't the most compelling striker as his stuff will tend to look like he's doing a demonstration, but he was more dangerous during the stand up than Naruse so it settled us into a fine striker v grappler story. His palm strikes were better here than pretty much any other time I can remember so that was a plus. Crowds are always bonkers for him as well and I'm still not really sure why, but you can't complain when they're rocking like this. Some nice drama down the stretch with both guys running low on points, Kakuta trying to score that winning knockdown, Naruse trying to grab a takedown and go for the tap. A fun bout is all I can really ask for out of Kakuta, so I was happy with what I got.


Sirra Fubicha v Kalil Valvitov

Man what the hell? I have no clue who either of these guys are, couldn't tell you where they're from, have never seen nor heard of them before and don't know if they ever grace the Fighting Network RINGS at any other point. And hey, this totally ruled. I was skeptical at first because it's fought over six three minute rounds and those bouts aren't usually the best, but they shut me up straight away as Fubicha heaves the much bigger Valvitov across the ring with a uranage. This had some hyyyyuge throws, including a couple super impressive deadlift Germans, an awesome powerslam, a sort of death valley driver, many a uranage and at one point Fubicha even did a headscissors takeover! Neither are great on the mat but we all appreciate Valvitov's determination when it comes to locking in an STF. I'm not sure he knew how to do anything else. Either way he sensed that it was his route to victory and he wouldn't be swayed. Fubicha was pretty wild with his striking, at least in that he would kind of shriek before unloading a flurry of palm strikes, backhands and a pump kick or two. By the end they'd run out of ideas and both were clearly knackered, but it might've been the best fight using the rounds system so far. A bit ugly, a bit sluggish, a bit awesome.


Yoshihisa Yamamoto v Pieter Oele

This was another spirited little contest. I'm not familiar with Oele, but you could tell pretty early that he was a kickboxer and not long after that you could tell this was going the striker v grappler route. Even though Yamamoto has nice stand up (or would come to have nice stand up. It wasn't fully developed at this point) he wasn't likely to have much joy on the feet here. Oele was absolutely drilling him with leg kicks that had to just suck being on the receiving end of. I mean these were hellish. Then he'd celebrate each knockdown by sitting up on the turnbuckle like "c'mon, what's the hold up here?" That sort of behaviour along with his punchable Jerry Seinfeld face had me rooting for our boy Yamamoto, and sure enough I thought he was pulling it out the bag when he hooked in a gnarly STF (there have been some killer shoot style STFs on this show). I feel like Oele would make for an interesting Maeda opponent. He hits enough like a truck that you can buy him as a threat standing up, and also because Maeda would be way less receptive to having his legs chopped to bits and might throw professionalism out the window. Not that it'd be like him.


Willie Peeters v Sergei Sousserov

Short and nifty. Both these guys are fun and Sousserov looks like he could end up being really good, so I had some expectations for this. Even thought it barely went five minutes they were pretty well met for what it was. Sousserov's engine is ridiculous and he's constantly moving forward in fights, which led to a couple cool moments where Peeters caught him shooting in for takedowns with a high kick. The stand up wasn't the most crisp, but it was active and they made use of their time. Awesome finish as well.


Dick Vrij v Mitsuya Nagai

Also spirited! This show is fairly bringing it with the fun five minute bouts. Vrij caught Nagai in the face with a closed-fist punch early on and apologised deeply for it, but then someone in Nagai's corner must've said something to piss the big fella off and from that point on he just tried to unleash holy murder. I've said a bunch of times that Vrij has presence and when he's in the mood to cave someone's face in you truly feel for the person whose nose is getting splattered across their coupon. Nagai would shoot in for leglocks and a couple times he forced rope breaks, Vrij would respond with brutal kicks and palm strikes, the crowd ate all of it up. I'll take five minutes of that twelve times out of ten, thank you very much.


Volk Han v Andrei Kopylov

This was way more one-sided than their last bout. Han comes out the gate firing and drops Kopylov with a knockdown, then forces him into a rope break shortly thereafter, and I wonder if anything is quite as terrifying a prospect as pissed off Volk Han out to avenge a previous loss. Kopylov is fun as hell but he was strangely passive in this. There were times where you could see him almost waiting for Han to set stuff up, like he knew this was a fight where Han was going to look great, but didn't know how to create that sense of struggle at the same time. On the one hand it means you get to see Han do a bunch of preposterous shit on a blank canvas. On the other hand it's not nearly as compelling - or impressive - as when he'd do a bunch of preposterous shit against an opponent trying to prevent it with a little more endeavor. But it's Han doing his wizardry so it's hard to complain too much. His reverse figure four was a thing of beauty but his set-up for the rolling armbar was just as great, the way he threw that kick to the midsection to buckle Kopylov over and create his opening. Obviously this was good.


Complete & Accurate RINGS

Wednesday, 5 February 2020

Hot Rod!

Roddy Piper v Jay Youngblood (Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling, 10/17/81) - GOOD

Really cool ten minute bout. Piper's best quality in the ring might be his unpredictability. He'll do a bunch of shit off the cuff that makes all of his matches feel uncooperative. Going for an armdrag? Nope, you're getting flung on your arse. Collar-and-elbow tie-up? Here's a headbutt. Punch exchange? You're getting dragged by the hair into a headlock and a thumb's getting jabbed in your throat. It might look messy sometimes, but I'll take that a hundred times out of a hundred over something that looks like a pre-planned choreography session (yes I am an old man yelling at clouds. I've made peace with it). This started great with some real quick scrambling. Piper would take Jay's back, Jay would take Piper's and muss up his hair, so Piper would grab a handful of Jay's and swing him around. He'd take powders because maybe he underestimated Yougblood, then he'd shit talk Caudle for making that point. He even suggested a death match with Yougblood when Jay made the challenge earlier on the show, now he's having to regroup. This of course annoys him further and it leads to them trading snug headbutts and chops. Last couple minutes are a race to beat the clock, Piper going off on the ref' when he can't put Youngblood away with the sleeper. And of course a draw isn't an acceptable result so he beats on Jay some more after the bell. Piper really feels like one of the great studio match wrestlers of all time.


Complete & Accurate Hot Rod

Tuesday, 4 February 2020

Steamboat v Tully...and the No Run Rule!

Ricky Steamboat v Tully Blanchard (Starrcade, 11/22/84)

Man do I love this match. On an individual level it's some of the best stuff both guys have ever done, or at the very least it's some of my favourite. It's different from your typical awesome Steamboat performance (awesome being typical for yer man Ricky). When you talk about the best of Ricky Steamboat you usually think of the theatrics and the emoting and the selling all the way to the back row. In contrast, this was more subtle and probably came off better to those of us watching through the screen. I actually haven't seen any of the build up to this, which could easily be rectified given how much of the surrounding TV footage is on the Network, but Steamboat comes in with a hip/rib injury on his left side. That injury is the crux of the match, but rather than being on the back foot because of it, where he's selling a beatdown with the ribs as Tully's target, it's more about him trying to put Tully away before the injury completely debilitates him. It's Steamboat as offensive dynamo, which isn't really a role you associate with him. He was hitting all sorts of big offence though; a swinging neckbreaker, huge powerslam, his strikes were crisp (including this awesome ax kick out the corner), a big back suplex, even Tully's own slingshot suplex. You still get the selling, it's just a bit more understated, more from the front foot. He looks great during the early flurry where he just swarms Tully, but then he needs to catch his wind and the adrenaline wears off a bit. You can see right there that he isn't 100% by the way he grabs the hip. Love how he'd circle Tully by keeping his left side turned away from him, always trying to shield it where possible, how he'd stop and catch a pained breath, which plausibly gave Tully a chance to recover a little each time. Tully's first dig to the ribs is perfection. Steamboat tries to hide how much it stung, but Tully isn't stupid and sees exactly where his opening is, doing his little strut after his route to victory's been presented to him. At one point Steamboat stopped, clutched his side and looked at Tully like "you are such a little prick." And we were all with him because Tully truly is the ultimate prick. He was amazing in this. The rules are that he can't run away or be disqualified to keep the belt through bullshittery and early on his first instinct is always to bolt. There are three instances in the first thirty seconds where he wants to roll out the ring to break Steamboat's momentum, but then it dawns on him that he can't and has to head back into the eye of the storm. His offence comes in spurts, mostly opportunistic, but when they do come it's relentless. Even off a rope break he'll just lunge at Steamboat and elbow or knee or drive a shoulder into Steamboat's side. If Steamboat leaves himself open too long you know Tully's throwing a jab in there, which led to Steamboat having to go for a chinlock a couple times to contain him. Then when Tully can't string together any offence he opts for the shithousing. He spits at Steamboat's face and does this goofy Ali shuffle, strutting away as Steamboat looks at him with pure venom. That obviously led to the perfect revenge spot with Steamboat spitting point blank in Tully's bloody face before chopping him to bits. Tully being desperate and going to the foreign object isn't surprising and I like how Steamboat kicked out of the first shot, so you think he's survived it, only for Tully to be Tully and find himself a second chance. You make your own luck after all and there's a reason Tully so often had a title around his waist. I do wish they played up Steamboat's injury a bit more in the back half, but it's a small gripe overall and both guys were incredible. Maybe my favourite Starrcade match ever.